Page 69 of Goddess of Light

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

DEATH

A hush drapesover Castle Syntri’s corridors, a quiet unlike the tense silence that ruled before the battle. This hush is heavy with exhaustion and grief, but also with a fragile sense of relief. It has been three days since we drove the Old Gods and Louhi’s undead legion back, long enough for the numbness of shock to wear off. Now, the pain settles in: the loss of General Pekka and so many troops who trusted me, the wounds that may never fully heal, the knowledge that victory was only a reprieve, not the end of our struggle.

I stand at a narrow window in one of the castle’s smaller towers, looking out over the courtyard. Snow still clings to the ramparts, though the storms have calmed ever since Hanna reclaimed her mortality, and in turn, her personality. I have a fucking wife again, which is the only thing that soothes me in this uneasy aftermath.

The Star Swamp beyond lies quiet, its surface crusted with new ice. We fractured the enemy’s forces here, but they will return, stronger, and if I know Louhi, with newfound vengeance and brutality. I can feel it. It will not be long before she unleashes another horror upon us, making sure to really makeit hurt this time. There’s nothing worse than a demon woman scorned—I should know.

The morning light filters through thin clouds, casting a cool glow over my gloved hands. Three days past, those same hands gripped a blade that sliced through Old Gods’ flesh, directed gunmen, tried to hold our fragile alliance together. Today, they tremble slightly; not from fear, but from the weight of what lies ahead. Even though my role as God has been to welcome and steer the souls of the dead, I find myself burdened with their fragile hopes. It’s not just the dead of the whole world, this one and the one above, but these troops I have manipulated into being here. I wonder if that makes me no better than Louhi.

But desperate times…

I glance up at the sky and wonder if the snowbird will ever return. So far, I haven’t seen any sign of my sister Ilmatar. I wonder if the bird got as far as Shadow’s End or if it met its demise along the way. Another soldier lost.

Footsteps sound out from behind me, and I turn to see Hanna entering the room. She halts in the doorway, her eyes scanning my face. For a moment, I see the fear in them, and it cuts me to the core. She might be her old self, but the cost of invoking her sun-gifted powers still haunts her. She has told me how, in that blazing moment of unleashing solar wrath, she nearly lost herself for good. How she’d looked at us with no recognition, how the world had become alien. Now, restored to herself, she’s terrified that using her powers again might erase her memories once more. She says the powers are still there, burning inside her like coals, ready to burn.

I beckon her closer. “Hanna,” I say softly. Her name carries a thousand emotions. Just a few days ago, I feared I’d lost her forever. Now, she’s here, her expression anxious but determined. So damned beautiful.

“My queen. My little bird,” I add. “Be with me.”

She steps forward, her hand tightening around the doorframe before letting go. She has regained her dark hair, her eyes their familiar chocolate brown.

“Where have you been?” I ask.

“I’ve been trying to think,” she whispers, voice low. “I know what we have to do next, but I’m…” She hesitates, words catching in her throat. “Well, I’m fucking scared, Tuoni.”

I reach for her hand, and she lets me hold it. I feel the tension thrumming in her fingertips. “I know,” I answer gently, curling her fingers between mine. “Your powers saved us, but they took something from you as well. No one expects you to wield them lightly again.”

Or at all.

She swallows, nodding, her eyes glistening like dark pools. “It’s like a living nightmare. I can’t stop seeing it play out like some bad movie. I remember looking down at you all and feeling nothing. It was as though the sun’s power scorched away my ties to this place, to you, to even my own father. That can’t happen again. If I forget myself, if I forget you…” Her voice trembles. “Well, I think I’d rather die than face that emptiness.”

My little bird has always had a flair for the dramatic, but I don’t like how grave she sounds.

“You won’t lose us again,” I promise, though I feel it’s a promise that might not be kept. “We will find another way. We have new allies to consider, remember?”

I gesture down to the courtyard, where soldiers re-pack supplies. Further down in the armory, Torben and Ilmarinen refine the sampo, their device to purify the ley lines and take down the rest of the Old Gods. If that works, maybe we can fight without relying so heavily on Hanna’s solar wrath.

She nods, biting her lip. “Yes, the sampo thingy. Whatever the hell that is. And the trolls, right?”

“That’s right.”

Her eyes dance with disbelief. “Like, for real? Actual trolls? Like straight from the Hobbit, or…?” She pauses. “Wait, you’ve probably never seen that one.”

“I have seen all three Hobbit movies, thank you very much,” I tell her. “That was a whole day I’ll never get back. And yes, like those ones. Maybe a little less ugly, and certainly not dumb. They’ll be good to have on our side.”

She laughs, a sound I’ve missed so terribly much. “Well, that does make me feel better about not being able to go full Goddess for you when you need it. So where are these not-ugly trolls?”

I smile wryly. “They arrived earlier. I have word they’re in the war room currently. We’ll go meet them together.”

The Keskellis are twenty-foot-tall trolls who once roamed lands beyond the Star Swamp. They got our message late, or so they claim, having sheltered in ice caves within the Frozen Void. Now, they come to offer their help. I’m curious what shape that help will take.

Hanna and I leave the tower, walking side by side through the halls, torches sputtering in drafty corners. Soldiers salute quietly as we pass. Some smile at Hanna with relief and respect—she is the one who turned the tide of the battle, after all. Others still show fear in their eyes, awed by her brief transformation. She acknowledges them with a nod, face carefully composed.

Such a queen, especially with her wearing one of Louhi’s leftover dresses, this one black with silver trim that matches my eyes. They look a million times better on Hanna. Everything does.

I sigh internally.

---