Page 76 of Play It Sinful

“You can talk to me.” She steps closer.

Clenching my jaw, I sit on the edge of the bed with my shoulders hunched forward. I can’t make eye contact. I’m too ashamed.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” I grit out. “And I don’t it anymore.”

She sits next to me and takes my hand. “I get it. I suffer from anxiety, and I don’t want anyone to know.”

My heavy heart skips a beat. I glance at her and get lost in her earnest gaze. “Did you tell me just to make me feel better?”

“No. I told you because I trust you. You can lean on me, Sean. Maybe not right now, but whenever you’re ready.”

My eyes burn, and a lump gets stuck in my throat. I start shaking all over as a storm of emotions surges through my body. Words form on my tongue. I’m about to blurt out the truth, but I’m not ready to say it out loud. I cup her cheek instead and crush my lips to hers—a desperate attempt to silence myself.

Ashley’s mouth parts, and I delve into her sweet taste. My pulse is racing. I’ve never felt so unraveled and at the mercy of anyone before. I need her like I need air.

She leans back, or I nudge her—I’m not sure. All I know is that we’re both lying in bed now with me on top. I’m shivering with desire, burning for her. Blindly, I push her leggings and underwear down, and Ashley helps with the pants I didn’t take off. We’re seem to be caught up in the same urgency.

When I finally slide into her, a sense of peace washes over me. With Ashley, I’m safe. She’s home to me.

CHAPTER 32

ASHLEY

I’m a pile of nerves, hence why I’m pacing back and forth in the green room. The art expo has already started, but I’m trying to stop the panic attack that’s brewing. My chest is tight, constricted by fear. I can’t make my body move toward the exit and face the crowd. I’ve been working on a small collection of paintings since I started my arts program here at Hannaford U, but I had no idea we’d have to showcase our work so soon. What if they say my work sucks, and I don’t belong in the arts program?

I’m alone with my thoughts because my peers have long gone out to mingle.

“Ash? There you are.”

I whirl around and the pressure in my chest decreases as giddiness takes over. I always feel this way when I’m in Sean’s presence. We’ve come a long way since our days of feuding, and finding out his secret made us closer. He’s not ready to talk about his scars yet, but now I understand him better. He’s fighting invisible demons just like me.

“What are you doing here?” I ask through a smile.

He walks over holding a square white box. “Looking for you. Why aren’t you out there, bragging about your art?”

I bite my lower lip. “I’m not sure if there’s anything to brag about.”

He shakes his head. “Tsk, for someone so talented, you sure sound silly. I don’t remember you ever being shy of your accomplishments as a cheerleader.”

“Cheerleading was easy, and it was never my lifelong goal. But art... that’s going to be my career. If I suck, then what?”

“You don’t suck. Here, I brought something for you.” He hands me the white box.

It’s clear on top, and I see the pink glazed donut inside, covered in rainbow sprinkles. My heart does a backflip. I look up. “How did you know?”

He touches my face, making me melt. “How did I know Ditzy Donuts is your happy place treat? Wild guess.”

I don’t eat a lot of junk food, but whenever I’m stressed about something, a donut from my favorite shop calms me down. But I don’t recall eating any in front of Sean. Then it dawns on me. I had a bag from Ditzy Donuts at orientation.

“I can’t believe you remember.”

“I remember everything about you, gorgeous.” He smiles, and I’m officially in liquid form. “Now eat your donut, and let’s go out there.”

“Okay. But I’m not eating it by myself.”

“Don’t worry about me. I’m more than fine watching you eat.”

Heat spreads across my cheeks. The way he spoke sounded like a caress. I’m getting turned on already, so I drop my attention to the donut. I open the lid and take out the gooey sugar ball. When I take a bite, it melts in my mouth, and I moan. “So good.”