Page 36 of Play It Sinful

I’m bummed that I didn’t have a chance to talk to Kenzie alone to ask her why she really moved back to Boston. I suppose I can talk to her later on the phone, and if she keeps evading me, I’ll corner her in a couple of weeks when Sean and I go to Boston for her birthday.

Shit. I wonder what that road trip will be like. I don’t even know if we’ll still be screwing like bunnies by then. Ourrelationship has an expiration date, after all. I’m not sure how I feel about that certainty. I didn’t expect I’d keep coming back for more, but every time we’re near, I can’t resist the attraction.

I don’t know if I’ll see Sean later today. He said he was due at the training facility, and I couldn’t ask in front of everyone what he was doing later. The old Ashley wouldn’t care, and she most definitely wouldn’t be checking her phone every five minutes to see if Sean texted her.

I’m so mad at myself. I’ve never allowed any guy to have that kind of power over me, and I’m not about to start with Sean.

I grab my sketchbook and start to doodle random shit. But the exercises aren’t distracting enough. I put on my headphones and listen to Halsey, one of my favorite singers, then I flip to a blank page and start to sketch a scene.

I get in the zone while singing “Bad at Love,” but after half an hour, I realize in horror what I drew. Sean in his hockey uniform and me. He’s holding me in place with his hockey stick.Fucking hell. I drop my pencil and close the sketchbook almost violently.

I can’t stay in my room. I need to be around people, but not my friends, because I don’t want to chat. The library it is. It’s one of my favorite places on campus. If I can’t focus while surrounded by books, then there’s no hope for me.

I never bothered changing into my comfortable clothes when I got back to my room, so I just shove my laptop in my bag and head out. I consider renting one of the campus bikes, but it’s getting cold, and I’m not in the mood to exercise, so driving it is.

It’s past eleven, and the Percy Library isn’t empty anymore. All the individual tables by the windows are taken, but there are spots available at the larger tables in the middle. I spot one where I won’t have shoulder to shoulder neighbors and make a beeline toward it, but halfway there, a soft giggle draws my attention. I turn… and freeze. Sean is sitting next to a girl, leaning toward her with a big smile on his face. She’s totally intohim. They’re engaged in full flirtation mode, and the sight is akin to being sucker punched in the stomach. I can’t breathe.

He said he needed to train, and it’s been only an hour since we left the restaurant. I’m not into hockey, but I was a cheerleader, and I know very well that practice for any sport doesn’t last only thirty minutes. That asshole lied. I could pretend I didn’t see him, but perversely, I want him to know I caught him.

I pull my cell phone out and send a text.

ME: Your idea of practice is very different than mine.

I put my phone away and wait for him to check the text. If he doesn’t right away, I’ll just... what? I don’t know what to do. I could march up to him and say something snarky, but do I really want to let him know I’mthatbothered he’s flirting with a random chick?

His phone is on the desk, and it lights up. He reads the text, then, frowning, he looks for me. We stare at each other for a couple of beats, then his companion touches his arm, and he switches his attention back to her.

My stomach bottoms out, and my heart feels heavy and small. I’m not sure what I was expecting from him, but it wasn’t total indifference.

When tears prickle my eyes, I turn on my heels and stride toward the exit. I’m hurt, and I have no one to blame but myself. I’ve known what a dick Sean is for years. Why would he change now?

I’m distraught and don’t notice it’s now raining cats and dogs until I’m about to walk out of the library. “Shit.”

My car isn’t parked near the building. If I make a run for it, I’ll get soaked, and my laptop will probably be ruined.

“Don’t have an umbrella?” a male voice asks.

I turn and find a tall and attractive guy standing next to me. He has longish, tousled brown hair, and bright blue eyes. He looks familiar, but I can’t place him.

“Nope. Don’t I know you from somewhere?”

He smiles. “You came to my masquerade party.”

I widen my eyes. “You’re Blair’s brother.”

His eyes twinkle, and his grin remains in place. “I’m Ryder. Nice to officially meet you.”

Man. Heisa hottie. Too bad Sean found me first at the party.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Ashley. I can’t believe you recognized me. My hair was pink then.”

“I didn’t forget your face.”

And said face must be turning all shades of red. I turn my attention to the downpour outside. “Well, it seems we’re stuck here until that passes.”

“Not necessarily. I have a big umbrella.” He shows me what’s in his hand. “I can walk you to your car, if you don’t mind getting close to me.”

Like an idiot, I glance in Sean’s direction. He and his study buddy are gone. Maybe they went to find a nook to hookup in.Jerk.

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