Page 108 of Play It Sinful

“It’s not your fault.”

“I never had any doubt in my mind you were mine, but still, I should have done a paternity test to be sure.”

“So, you aren’t going to be against our relationship now?”

He frowns. “God no. If you still love Ash after all this time, and she still loves you, I won’t stand in the way of your happiness. I’ve messed up your lives enough.”

I stare into the distance. “I’m not sure if she still loves me. I never told her why I had to end things, and I hurt her terribly.”

Dad squeezes my shoulder. “You were protecting her. She’ll come around.”

I let out a derisive laugh. “You don’t know that. But I’ll do anything to get her back.”

ASHLEY

When I finally wake up, everything hurts. A doctor tells me I was in an almost fatal car wreck. In fact, I did flatline a couple times during surgery. I lost a kidney, and they’re monitoring the one I have left. In case it fails, Kenzie is on standby and ready to offer me one of hers. I feel like I’m having an out-of-body experienceas the doctor dumps all that information on me under the watchful eyes of Mom and Chris.

The last thing I remember is, ironically, a deer’s eyes shining in my headlights. I hit the poor animal, and in retribution, it almost killed me.

I’m in a lot of pain, so the doctor gives me more painkillers and I pass out again. I’m not sure how long I sleep, but when I wake up, I’m not alone in the room. Sean is sleeping in a chair in the corner. His hair is tousled, and he’s in need of a shave, but he’s still the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen. It’s fucking unfair. My heart squeezes tight, and it hurts. The last time we were together, he kissed me, then rejected me again.

God, why does he have to be in my room now? It’s possible he’s covering for Mom, Chris, and Kenzie. Maybe I’ve been sleeping for too long. But I can’t deal with Sean’s bullshit and remorse. Knowing him, he probably blames himself for my accident.

I could pretend to be asleep and wait until his shift is over, but I’m parched. I try to find the button to call a nurse, but my coordination is shot, and I ended up fumbling with the control for the bed. It’s the kind that’s attached to a cord, and when I drop it, it bangs against something made of metal.

Sean jerks awake, and his eyes immediately find mine, which are wide open. Fuck. I can’t pretend to be asleep now.

“Ash… you’re awake.”

“Thanks for that helpful observation,” I rasp. “I wouldn’t have known otherwise.”

He stands and walks closer. “How do you feel?”

“Like a deer hammered into me at eighty miles an hour.”

His lips curl into a grin. “Your tongue is as sharp as ever. That’s a good sign.”

“Whatever. Why are you here?”

He frowns. “Where else am I supposed to be?”

“Uh… at school or the arena?”

“Do you think I could focus in class or play hockey when you almost died?” he replies in a choked voice.

I try not to react, but yearning hits me hard, making me angry. I don’t want to feel this intensely about him still. “You say that as if you didn’t spend the last three years ignoring me.”

He pushes his bangs back. “I didn’t ignore you. Trust me, I tried, but I couldn’t.”

“Wow. You can’t spare me your assholery even when I’m recovering in a hospital bed.”

Guilt flashes in his eyes. “That came out wrong. That’s not what I meant.”

I close my eyes and sigh. “Honestly, I couldn’t care less about what you meant. I’m tired and in pain.”

He takes my hand, making my eyes fly open. He’s watching me with such raw emotion that it robs me of air. “What are you doing?”

“I was going to wait until you were dischar?—”