Page 67 of Modern Romance Collection May 2024 Books 1-4

‘Thank you,’ said Erin absently.

And then, as if manifested by her imagination, she looked up and saw Ajax walking across the lawn to them with a determined look on his face. Erin felt like running—and also too weary to run...as if she’d been running for a long time and wanted to stop.

He was dressed in jeans and a shirt—untucked, sleeves rolled up. He’d been working from home today. Ashling saw him and clapped her hands and stood up unsteadily. Ajax crouched down a few feet away and held out his arms, Ashling had no hesitation and ran straight into them, squealing with glee when he lifted her up high into the air, twirling her around.

Erin envied the simplicity of the relationship between them.

Ajax came over and kneeled down, putting Ashling back on the ground, where she pounced on her toys again. He looked at Erin. ‘Can we talk?’

Panic flared. A sense of nausea gripped her at the memory of earlier that morning.

‘I told Damia I’d help her with an English essay she has due—’

Ajax reached out and caught her hand gently, stopping her from standing.

She stopped and pulled it back.

He said, ‘I’d prefer to talk elsewhere, but you keep running away from me every time I try to talk to you.’

‘I was in your bed last night,’ Erin said, almost accusingly—as if he was responsible for some witchcraft that got her to come to him like some kind of automaton.

Ajax snorted. ‘As if that’s where we’ll get any talking done! Maybe in another ten years, when I don’t want you as much as I—’

‘We won’t be together in ten years.’ Erin cut him off, panic rising. The net was closing around her.

‘Yes, we will, Erin Murphy. Because I love you, and I’ve been trying to tell you for days now, and you keep avoiding—’

But she was already on her feet, galvanised by a force deep inside that she couldn’t fully understand. All she knew was that she had to leave...get away—now.

She started walking blindly up the garden. Ajax called from behind her. ‘Dammit, Erin, would you just—? Where are you going?’

She turned around but kept walking backwards. Ajax was holding Ashling in his arms. She was looking confused, putting out her hand. Erin felt emotion rising, threatening to consume her.

‘I’m sorry... I can’t do this,’ she got out, and she fled.

The driver had dropped Erin in the Plaka area of Athens. It was crowded with tourists and locals. She walked blindly for a long time, trying not to think of what Ajax had said.

‘I love you.’

He didn’t mean it. It was a platitude to get her to agree to stay with him...to create a life that would fall apart once he lost interest.

Erin recognised a doorway and stumbled to a halt. She went in and was greeted by a doorman, who pressed a button on the elevator for her. She stepped into the dark space, only then recognising it as the restaurant where Ajax had taken her on one of those first nights.

She wanted to turn around and get out, but it was too late. The elevator doors were opening again and a waiter was leading her to a quiet table. There weren’t many people. It was between lunch and dinner time. The staff changeover was happening.

A glass of water and a glass of wine materialised in front of her—she didn’t even remember ordering them. She took a big gulp of water, but ignored the wine.

‘I love you.’

Erin shook her head. But then she thought of Ashling, her face confused, in Ajax’s arms, her little hand held out.

A memory rose up, unbidden, of herself as a child, a toddler...crying and pleading, hanging on to her mother’s skirt, her hands being prised away, her father lifting her up. And how it had felt to stretch out her hand towards her mother, watching her as she disappeared behind a closed door.

Even at that young age, Erin realised now, she’d believed that somehowshe’dcaused her to leave. Because she’d loved her mother too much and wanted her to stay. So she’d left.

Erin only realised she was crying when she looked up and saw Ajax standing there. He was immediately concerned, coming to her side.

‘What is it? Is it really so bad if I love you?’

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