Page 16 of Always Heated

“Like?” I shriek. “It was like two decades of pent up sexual tension that exploded! I can’t marry Zack when I’m fucking myself thinking of Travis.”

“Serious question: Did he touch you?”

I think for a minute. “No. Well…” I wince. “He sucked my fingers after I was touching myself.”

“Cass!”

“You asked!”

There’s a moment of silence before she carefully inquires, “Do you love Travis?”

“No,” I answer honestly. “I love both of them like I love you. I’d give you my kidney if you needed it, but I don’t think we should get married.”

“Good, because I’m already married to your brother. It would be quite an awkward conversation to have with him,” she laughs.

“You know what I mean! I don’t love Travis in some big consuming way. But I also don’t love Zack that way. Oh. Fuck. I’m in some sort of messed up love triangle! Is it too late to move to another state and change my name?”

“You arenotmoving. Go home, sleep on it, and in the morning you need to tell Zack what’s going on.”

After several deep breaths, I begin to slip on my ring, but promptly take it off. As I nod to no one, I agree, “Sleep. Talk to Zack in the morning.”

I can’t help repeating Travis’ words in my head. “Show me you’re mine, Cass. Come for me and I’ll give you everything.”

I’m an asshole. I may not have fucked another man, but letting this afternoon happen was just as bad, if not worse. I’m worse than the men who cheated on me in the past. I have two men who want me and I’m out here like a floundering fish.

“No matter what, you know I love you. And, no, that’s not an invitation to fuck me,” she jests. Ingrid is hopeful that I’ll choose Travis. I’m sure Caleb is as well, making his best friend his brother-in-law. But would Travis make me happy? Or am I caught up in the idea of a man I always wanted but never wanted me?

“Thanks, babe. I’ll call you later.”

“Love you!”

“Love you too.”

I hang up and drive to my house, finding two trucks and an SUV in my driveway. After throwing the truck into park, I turn off the ignition and rub my hands down my face. My sweet Zack is inside with no idea what I did earlier.

My door is unlocked, which irks me, but I brush it off. Tossing my purse and keys onto my counter, I make my way to the backyard. The four of them are on my patio laughing about something as I open the screen door.

“Cass!” Zack’s smile is wide, meeting his eyes and furthering my guilt.

“Hey, guys. So, how did it go?”Why do I sound like someone waiting for a patient to come out of surgery at my hospital?

“Sorry, sis. I know how much your garden meant to you, but none of it was salvageable.” Caleb grips the back of his neck. “The pipes were pretty bad. We fixed it up so they won’t leak or freeze in the winter, but you’ll have to start from scratch in the spring with your flowers and vegetables.”

As much as I’d love to crumple to the ground in tears, I stuff it down and take a deep breath. “Old houses, right?”

“Yeah,” Pop replies, standing to wrap me in a half hug. “Next spring, we’ll plant anything you want.”

“What about a she-shed?” a sultry voice purrs behind me.

I spin to face Travis. “What?”

“Hey man. When did you get here?” Cay asks and Travis only shrugs. “There isn’t enough space for a she-shed. It would be a she-den with four books and a kiddie chair.” Travis chuckles, shaking his head, but Caleb’s eyes narrow. “Don’t you normally sleep for two days after coming back from a fire?”

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he rocks back slightly on his heels. “I woke up and felt like a dick; there wasn’t a trace of Cass coming by my house after I offered. Figured I could help here if she wasn’t home yet.”

While it isn’t technically a lie, his reply is a half-truth. I pierce him with a glare and grit out, “They have it covered.”

“She’s right.” Zack gets up and slings his arm around me, kissing my temple. The gesture isn’t sweet, it feels possessive. “We finished a long time ago.”

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