Page 60 of Break

Wait. I only see male limbs everywhere with no sign of Mina’s leaner, more feminine ones in the mix. There’s a lump of blankets between Ethan and Vince that shifts slightly, then remains motionless again.

Moving forward quietly, I’m surprised to find a tuft of Mina’s hair poking from the top of the blanket. She’s completely buried in there.

Reanalyzing the situation, it becomes obvious that she had a rough night, and they laid with her. A bubble of jealousy starts to boil inside me, but I don’t think it’s because they’re in bed with her. Admitting to myself that it’s because I’m not in there too isn’t something I can do at the moment. She’s the least comfortable with me, and I don’t blame her.

Nudging Ethan, I don’t speak for fear of waking up the woman who’s been battling this fucking flu for two days now. He cracks his eye open, then closes it again to rub a hand over his face, scratching the stubble on his neck that’s grown overnight. Once his eyes open again, this time more awake, he sees the dog I’m holding in my hand and looks at me with his silent question.

I’m not fucking embarrassed about it, and I’ll continue to remind myself of that if either of them gives me any shit about it. “It’s for her,” I hiss out, keeping my voice low. “The hell are you guys doing in her bed?”

His voice is like rocks, scratchy from just waking up. “Nightmares.”

Shit.

“Were they bad?” My voice rouses Vincent on the other side and I watch as he reaches under the blanket. He moves his hand around until he stills a moment and then sighs with relief.

“Her fever finally broke,” he whispers as he pulls his hand back out. I can tell Ethan is just as relieved by that news as I am.

Ethan answers my previous question. “It was pretty bad last night, but she settled down once we got in here.” Lifting his arms to stretch, he winces when his back cracks. “You need to replace this bed. It’s hard.”

Narrowing my eyes at him, I step back so he can get out of bed. “Noted.”

Ethan slips out of the room for a moment, returning with a couple of fresh bottles of water for her side table. Then, he collects the empty ones and leaves after informing me he’s going to shower. Vincent is slower to leave her bed, but eventually he’s standing and adjusting himself under his sweats. “I’m gonna shower, too. You good in here? She’s due for another round of meds in about half an hour.”

Nodding, I check over Mina, whose face has been unburied after the guys left, still sleeping peacefully. Her color looks like it’s coming back, and she seems more at ease than she has been in the last two days.

I’ve done a lot of thinking as I spent hours sitting in here. Remembering as many interactions I’ve had with her over the years. I kept going back to that day in her room when Danny and I destroyed her paper house. I remembered when Danny tore apart that stuffed rabbit laying alone in the center of her pristinely made bed.

There hasn’t been a good opportunity to talk to her and apologize, but that’s probably partly an excuse because I’m dreading it. Not that she doesn’t deserve to hear it, but because I’m nervous. Getting her something to replace what I destroyed felt like a good ice-breaker. It’s not a rabbit, but a Dane that looks like mine. She seems to really love Walter.

Just thinking about him was enough for him to come into the room, then jump up at the foot of the bed like he belongs here. Holding back a laugh when he flops to the side and falls right to sleep, I slip the stuffed dog in next to Mina’s hand so she’ll see it when she wakes.

Going back out to the hall, I pick up another bag of items I got for her this morning to replace the rest of what I ruined. There’s a small desk in the room where she’s left the rest of the paper that Ethan gave her when she first arrived.

Setting a stack of multi-colored paper, some solids, and some with prints, I lay them in neat piles. I look them over to make sure they’re presentable before stepping back.

“What’s this?” her sleepy voice calls out.

Turning around quickly, I love that she’s tucked her new gift against her chest. She eyes me warily before darting back to the papers I’ve arranged. “How are you feeling? You look better.”

Her deep breath confirms that she would agree. “A bit, yes. Max… what is this?” she asks again.

“I didn’t know,” I admit, then kick myself for not thinking before I spoke. Guess I’m gonna do this now, then.

“Didn’t know what?”

Holding out a finger, I point at the stack of papers and beg her to understand what I’m trying to say. “I didn’t know this was your thing. It doesn’t excuse what I did, not in the slightest, but I need you know that I didn’tknow.”

I watch her struggle to sit up for only a few seconds before I’m moving to help her. I stuff an extra pillow behind her back so she can be more comfortable. “Max, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She sets the dog in her lap and runs a slender finger down the nose, petting the plush fur. “Where’d this come from?”

Gripping the back of my neck, I look to the ceiling, pleading with my body to not blush right now, and failing. Maybe I lied to myself before and I am a little embarrassed about buying it for her. Clearing my throat, I mutter, “I got it for you. To replace the one we ruined. That’s what all of this is, trying to give you back what I took away.”

Please don’t make me say anymore. Please figure out what I’m referring to.

She’s confused as she tries to decipher what I’m telling her, but then understanding dawns on her and her face crumples, gutting me to the core.God, I was such a fucking piece of shit to her.“You’re the one that did it?”

Nodding, I can feel the shame rising, lifting my shoulders to my ears. I try to cover it by shoving my hands in my pockets, digging my nails into my palms. “I’m sorry, Mina. I was a stupid kid, and I didn’t think about what I was doing at the time.”

She’s silent for a long moment before finally speaking. “Why are you telling me this now?”