Page 61 of A Kingdom so Crimson

He was lying.The tension in the air was suffocating, thick with unspoken resentment and awkwardness.

Straightening my back, I forced a strained smile as he extended his arms, his cuffs unbuttoned. He cleared his throat, "Help me with this, will you?" His request sounded hollow but sincere.

Suppressing a sigh, I complied, assisting with one hand and the other. His touch felt like a branding iron against my skin; I sucked in a breath. The atmosphere grew even more uncomfortable.

"Eliah," he breathed, his voice heavy with regret, his eyes searching mine as he grasped my hand. "I was unkind to have treated you as I did the other day and all the days following."

His gaze dropped to our intertwined hands, a fleeting moment of vulnerability. "I don't know how to earn your forgiveness, but I'll keep trying. I hope one day you'll trust me. I'll make things right…and perhaps it will all make sense one day."

His words tumbled out, but the sincerity in his voice only stoked the fire of my anger.

Trust?I scoffed inwardly. The word landed in my gut like a punch. There was no trust here. Our entire relationship was built on a foundation of secrets I wasn't allowed to know. Only empty promises ofone day.

"When I was asleep, I saw things I can't describe. It felt real,too real,and for the first time, I trulyfeltfear, Levon…and I was fearful for my life," I confessed, gripping his hands tighter, searching desperately in his bright eyes for some kind ofunderstanding. They seemed so distant, so unreachable. "I was scared to die, knowing that I never had the chance to truly live."

I sighed heavily, feeling the weight of my words pressing down on me, and continued. "Let's not pretend anymore, Levon. I don't want to keep playing this role. I'm not fearless or heroic by any standard, and I know you truly cannot trust me enough to give me any source of information. You're keeping secrets from me." I released his hands, gesturing towards it with frustration. "I don't know if I'll ever beableto trust you."

The hurt in his eyes cut more profoundly than I expected, and I turned away, striding towards the door, unable to bear the weight of the emotions swirling between us.

"Your dream," he demanded abruptly, his tone tinged with urgency. "What was it?" The image of the shadowy figure flashed through my mind, the icy grip of chains tightening around my wrists and ankles.

"It was just a dream," I replied curtly, meeting his gaze head-on. "You should focus on getting ready."

"Later, then?" he asked.

I walked to the door, not caring to meet his eyes. "The guests are arriving, and the host shouldn't keep them waiting," I said, opening the door.

He sighed, rubbing his temples in frustration before stooping down to lace up his shoes and don his dark blue overcoat. But I stormed out before he could finish, my anger simmering with escalating irritation.

The clatter of voices and the scent of food filled the air, drowning out the urge to yell in frustration.

"Eliah," Levon hissed, his footsteps echoing behind me. "Eliah, stop."

I skidded to a halt, knowing there was nowhere to run. I straightened my back and sharply turned to him, folding my arms.

"What Levon?" I sneered. "Stop so I can go on with your little schemes and lies that you so fully parade in front of me?"

His face was a mixture of confusion, anger, and despair, mirroring my own.

"I'm tired of thisact,complying and conforming toyour needs when no one tells me a bloody thing!"I raged, trying so very hard to keep my voice low. "You're a coward," I rasped, beginning to walk away.

"From the moment I witnessed your fiery spirit in that wretched dining room Jesri never let you eat at," his voice quivered with raw emotion, stopping me in my tracks once again. "To the time I found you bloodied after your evaluation or your ruffled hair after waking up next to you in the inn—I knew," he stopped, holding back his emotions. "You have been more than I could have ever imagined." His confession was raw and vulnerable.

"I've made mistakes, Eliah. Horrible things that haunt me every waking moment," he confessed, his voice heavy with remorse. "But I'm trying. Trying my best. All I've ever known is heartbreak and duty. I'm trying to forge a life my mother would be proud of, to honor her memory, and to give you the freedom you deserve."

He gave an airy, frustrated laugh, palming his eyes. "If being desperate for redemption makes me a coward in your eyes, then so be it."

His words stirred a whirlwind of emotions within me, a tumultuous storm of doubt and longing. Darius's last plea echoed in my mind, urging me to trust him and embrace his guidance—a choice that held the promise of freedom, of finally becoming who I truly wanted to be.

I pressed my fingertips against my temples, attempting to quell the rising tide of doubts and fears that threatened to overwhelm me.

Taking a deep breath, I locked eyes with Levon, finding a storm of emotions mirrored in his gaze, reflecting the turmoil raging within me.

"How can I trust you," I whispered, my voice barely audible over the tumult of emotions swirling within me. "When you keep me in the dark about matters that shape my life?" The words hung heavy, burdened with unspoken pain and betrayal.

His expression darkened as he glanced towards the festivity in his home, the noise of his guests a jarring contrast to the heaviness of our conversation. With somber steps, he approached me, a solemn aura enveloping us like a blanket of mourning.

"Tomorrow," he promised, his voice thick with emotion, uncertainty shadowing his features. "I'll show you." His breath hitched, betraying an uncertainty that seemed to gnaw at him.

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