Page 57 of A Kingdom so Crimson

"I'm so relieved you're awake," she said, squeezing me tightly before hurrying away, leaving Calum to regard me with apparent disapproval. I shot him a pointed look, silently conveying that I had managed perfectly well without him thus far. He only raised his eyebrows in response, looking me up and down as if to say, 'Really?'before brushing past me to follow Elise.

Suppressing my annoyance, I forced myself to stride towards Levon, suddenly feeling awkward in the lingering silence.

"Are you going to continue gawking at Kaizen, or should I leave?"

"No," he quickly replied, his head turning slightly, revealing only a glimpse of his warm hazelnut face. "Please, I—We…" he faltered.

We lingered in silence, the weight of unspoken words hanging heavy between us. Unable to bear it any longer, I stepped forward and grasped his muscled arm.

He didn't resist as I tugged on the sleeve of his white tunic, coaxing him to face me. My breath caught in my throat as I beheld the left side of his face, marred by bruises of varying shades. Some had begun to fade into a sickly yellow, while others retained a deep, angry purple hue. A small stitch traced along his jawline, and his once-swollen eye now blazed with redness, starkly contrasting his vibrant eyes.

He reached out to me tentatively, but I instinctively stepped back, a mix of shock and concern flooding me. I brought a hand to cover my open mouth, struggling to find the right words to express the tumult of emotions swirling inside me. I felt a wave of guilt, knowing I had done that…somehow.

"It's that bad?" he somberly teased, easing some of the tension burning inside me.

"Levon," I rasped, my hand twitching as if to reach out and touch his face, but I stopped myself, recoiling at the reality of what I had done. He swiftly grasped my hand in his own. "I did that to you," I whispered, unable to meet his gaze, overwhelmed by the guilt and regret that washed over me.

His calloused fingers brushed against my knuckles while his other hand gently tilted my chin upwards.

"Look at me, Eliah," he urged, his voice carrying a mix of command and desperation. I resisted, keeping my gaze fixed downward, feeling increasingly guilty.

"Eliah, look at me," he repeated, his grip on my chin tightening, compelling me to meet his gaze. Reluctantly, I raised my eyes, locking onto his brilliant gaze. His eyes widened as he scanned my face.

"You scared me," he confessed, a faint, sorrowful smile playing on his lips. His words pierced through me, stirring up a whirlwind of pain and sorrow. "I wasn't sure how long I could go without seeing your eyes or hearing your voice," he admitted, swallowing hard.

I shuddered, averting my gaze and taking a sudden step backward. He let his hand fall to his side as I shook my head in disbelief. His words from our walk echoed in my mind—this was his doing, and I couldn't ignore it. He bore the responsibility for all of this.

Sensing the change in tension, he shifted on his feet, teeth gritted in frustration. "Eliah… I had to do what I did to get you.If I hadn't—" he paused, locking his gaze with mine, the silver flecks in his eyes seeming to burn brighter. "Something else would have, and I couldn't bear that thought."

"But you could bear the thought of me possibly dying in this Match that you agreed to?" I snapped, the tension escalating as my anger simmered beneath the surface. "And what do you mean by something else?" I spat, knitting my brows together.

He rubbed his jaw, shaking his head in disbelief.

"What?" I lamented, frustration lacing my words. "You asked me to look at you, and I am. Perhaps for the first time, I'm truly seeing you." I took a deep breath, attempting to rein in my anger. "I'm sorry for this," I said, gesturing to his face. "But you cannot expect me to be fine with knowing you were the cause of all my pain. You were the one who betrayed me to Jesri. You orchestrated this entire ordeal.I was just a child, Levon!You took what little I had left and gambled it away for some lucrative ambition of a haughty Lord and never once spared a second glance for the child left bloodied in the training match." I stopped, huffing out a deep, seething breath that thundered inside me, reminding me to collect myself, my anger, and my all-too-loud voice now echoing throughout the room.

"I don't expect your forgiveness, nor do I want it," he muttered, his voice barely audible over the roaring rage in my ears. "But I do expect you to fulfill your purpose." He met my gaze with an intensity that sent a jolt of fury coursing through me. "And I will not apologize for doing what I did."

My breath caught in my throat, igniting the simmering rage inside me, urging me to unleash all the pent-up anger I had spent a lifetime suppressing onto him. I clenched my fists, gritting my teeth, and poised to strike out like we did that first day before I felt a warm, familiar hand on my shoulder, pulling me back—pulling me back into that life of submission, where Ionly obeyed, where I sat and listened, waiting for that wretched tree to make my dreams a reality.

One where he did pull all the strings.

Tears welled up in my eyes even before I saw the pain reflected in his own eyes. He quickly strode past me and out of the dining room, his footsteps a mere whisper against the ornate polished floors. Calum's hand tightened on my shoulder, seizing the opportunity, and pulled me into an embrace.

"Let's go home, El," he murmured into my ear, his words leaving me stunned and still grappling to comprehend every rutting thing. "I miss you. I can't bear to live without you by my side. Let's run away. Anywhere. Everywhere." He cupped my face in his hands, his breath mingling with mine. "I'll go wherever you lead. Just take me, and I'll follow. You shouldn't be here with these fools."

My heart swelled at his words, Levon's, and everything I was never meant to have. Believing that perhaps darkness was the only thing I was ever destined to feel—a never-ending stream of shadows that consumed me and my bleak life.

With a heavy breath, I pushed him away, knowing his game.

"No," I breathed, my hand still resting on his chest. He cocked his head, scowling at me, his frustration palpable. "A part of me will always love you, Calum, but I'm done. What you have to offer is something I could never accept." I knew that staying with him would only leave me vulnerable to Jesri's venomous schemes, coiling me back into his grasp and make me his puppet forever.

He grabbed my chin, his grip firmer than before, and forced me to meet his gaze. His eyes blazed with an intensity that mirrored the turmoil in my own heart.

"El,please," he begged, desperation creeping into his voice.

"You should go," I uttered, my grip tightening on his wrist until he relented and let go. "Give your report to Jesri. I'll finish what I started, but tell him Iwon'tbe coming back."

The words tasted bitter on my tongue, knowing it meant leaving Aoife and Darius behind and possibly never seeing them again. But I couldn't return, no matter how much it pained me. I couldn't.

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