Page 13 of The Sleight Before Christmas

Serena looks between us in confusion as Gracie gawks. “Dad, I didn’t mean to—”

“Yes, you did,” I state, taking another mouthful as my wife sounds up in support.

“My parents watched us like hawks all night,” she says, tightening her hold on my hand. I hadn’t told her that my daughter had humiliated me and utterly degraded me during checkout last week. Just as Serena hadn’t told me that Peyton had bitten her. Pathetically, and seemingly before last night, I think we were too embarrassed to admit these things to each other. Which only adds more ammo to our growing pile. A silent understanding passes between us as I nod.

“We were probably so obvious,” I utter.

“I loved your name,” Serena chimes in. “Is that weird?”

“Only because I still hate it,” I shake my head.

“Can Ipleasehave the money?” Gracie asks, panic clear in her voice.

Serena and I continue our banter. “You looked so beautiful that night.”

“It was jeans and a sweater,” she drawls.

“One that showed your navel,” I wink. “And your belly button ring.”

“Er my gawd,” Gracie sighs. “Fine, please, I’m sorry, okay? I’ll take out the trash and do extra chores when I get home. I’ll even watch Peyton.”

Another honk sounds.

“It was your name and the red in your hair. I never saw myself with a redhead. But I’ve never seen hair like yours before or since.”

“I have hair like Daddy’s,” Peyton says, feeling ignored. “... Daddy, pour me more milk,” he orders when neither one of us acknowledges him.

“I don’t take orders, Son.”

“What?”

“You have to ask politely,” Gracie states. “And Rudolph didn’t come last night, Peyton.Daddytook the tree down,” she spills in contempt.

“Bye bye Bum Bum cream,” I spit dryly as Peyton gapes at me.

“Great, so I get nothing for Christmas,” Gracie scoffs.

“That’s up to you. And for a smart girl, you sure are acting pretty stupid.”

“You can’t say that to me,” she gasps.

“I just did, daughter dearest.”

“All right, fine, Daddy, fine. I get it. I know you got mad last night when Mom got so upset, and I’m sorry. Peyton is, too, but you didn’t have to take down our tree and take our presents back. We can be sorry, can’t we, Peyton?”

“Yeah, Daddy, we can be sorry,” Peyton echoes promptly, nodding. “Reallysorry.”

“Uh huh,” I say, taking another bite. “I’ve got to run, babe. I’ve got to get that check from the Rasors to cover payroll.”

Serena nods as I stand. “Love you.”

“Love you,” she answers as I turn to ready myself and do a one-eighty, stalking over to my wife and taking her mouth in a borderline inappropriate kiss. When I pull away, she stares up at me, slightly stunned.

“We made out for weeks,” I murmur, “kissed and talked for hours andhours.”

“I wouldn’t exactly call it talking,” Serena shakes her head as if dazed.

Have I really been so silent all these years?

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