Page 60 of Ira

Harlow’s reaction was somewhat promising though. Her shock was wearing off, and now she was starting to pace the kitchen excitedly, drumming her fingers against the sides of her thighs. “Oh my god, can you imagine? This is going to be insane. I need to have cameras on all of their houses—I need footage of this. Do you think they’ll get dragged out of their beds in the middle of the night by the police? I hope it’s on the news. Come back from the shadow realm after they get arrested. We’ll have movie night. Popcorn and federal charges.”

“I don’t know if you’ll have time. If the Hunters clean house, you might end up next in line to take charge,” I pointed out, onlyhalf joking. The existing Council members had been clinging on to their positions for years—the only young person who’d been tapped for leadership in the whole country was Astrid, before she’d turned on them. Clearing out the old guard would leave a power vacuum for a Sebastian-type candidate to swoop into. He wasn’t quite as awful as the ones who were there now, I supposed.

Harlow wrinkled her nose. “Fuck that. I don’t play nicely with others. Then again, I might have to, because there are a bunch of assholes I don’t want anywhere near positions of power who’d be more than willing to jump in.”

“You can see why the others might have mixed reactions to what I’ve done,” I sighed. “Better the devil you know, et cetera, et cetera…”

Harlow snorted. “I hope they’re not that short-sighted. This is exactly what I’ve been telling Astrid we needed. A fresh start. A clean slate. Pages and pages of leverage that we can hold over them for the rest of their lives.”

She loaded my plate into the dishwasher while I washed my hands in the kitchen, acutely aware that I couldn’t put this off any longer.

“I wish I could come back with you,” Harlow said wistfully. “I wish I was down with off-grid living and could hack it in the shadow realm full-time. I’ve been trying to retrain my dopamine responses and be less, you know, chronically online, but it’ssohard. Do you know what I mean?”

“Not really,” I admitted with a sympathetic smile. “Part of avoiding everyone and everything after I was kicked out wasnotgoing online, which I appreciated even more when I got the shadow realm and didn’t miss it. If it helps, one thing Tallulah is really pushing for in the negotiations is for Hunters who want to spend time in the shadow realm being able to move between the two at will. You could work here during the day and get yourinternet fix, then go to the shadow realm at night. Join us for dinner in the dining hall—”

“Get a shadow daddy boyfriend?” Harlow cut in, eyes wide. “Oh my god, could I do that? I guess I’d have to find someone who was cool with me coming back here during the day. But it wouldn’t have to beeveryday. I could live like it was the Middle Ages every so often.”

“Absolutely. Why not? And I’m sure you could find someone who was cool with it—every Shade is different. So are all of the relationships between ex-Hunters and Shades.”

I could have sworn I could sense Verner silently letting me know that he wouldnotbe cool with it. That he absolutely wouldn’t be fine with me commuting between the human realm and the shadow realm.

Then again, we weren’t a couple. Were we?

No, we were friends. Friends who’d kissed and gotten naked together. And who maybe had feelings for each other.

Well, I definitely had feelings for him. But I’d already explained to him that I couldn’t be a loving, supportive partner. I didn’t know how. Plus, I’d dragged him on a spontaneous, multiday revenge mission in an incredibly dangerous environment for him, when he hadn’t even been able to communicate with me.

Verner was a gentleman, and he’d put up with a lot of my shit. But he wasn’t an idiot. At some point, he had to put himself first, and I would support that entirely. I wanted him to be happy above anything else. Far above my own happiness. I wanted his life to be beautiful, and meaningful, and easy.

Whatever it took for him to have that, I would do it happily.

Was that… love? Did Ilovehim?

“I think it’s time to go home,” I said awkwardly, looking at his hovering form. Verner immediately cupped my face in agreement.

“That’s so fucking cute,” Harlow whispered.

It was. If only it was forever.

Chapter 21

My head spun as we entered Harlow’s closet again, and I shadow walked Meera back into the darkness. The in-between materialized blessedly fast around us, and I gripped her shoulders tightly as a wave of dizziness came over me. I’d never spent so long in that form, and suddenly my own limbs felt odd and heavy.

“You need to feed,” Meera gasped, spinning to face me, her dainty hands gripping my forearms.

Did I?That seemed unreasonable. It hadn’t beenthatlong since I’d last fed from her—I usually went far longer than that without needing to visit the energy stores.

“Verner, you’re stumbling. Sit down.” I let Meera pull me down to the ground, though she suddenly seemed stronger than she usually did. Or perhaps I was weaker. If we returned to thehuman realm for any further quests, I was going to ask that we made more frequent trips home. “You need to feed,” she repeated more firmly. “I’m going to take care of you.”

“You don’t have to,” I mumbled. “Someone might find us.”

They had to have realized we were missing and started properly looking by now. Weak as I was, I might have to kill someone if they saw Meera in a state of undress.

“I’ll tell them to go away then. You are more important, Verner.”

Meera climbed onto my lap, her arms around my neck helping keep me upright. My hands flexed at her sides, desperate to hold on to her, but not wanting to overstep. When my Meera wanted me to touch her, she would tell me.

“Touch me, Verner,” she whispered. My palms immediately landed lightly on the sides of her thighs, wanting the closeness with her more than anything. How far could I go? What exactly did she mean? To my surprise, Meera briefly released her hold on my neck, gripping my wrists and shyly pulling my hands back to cup her ass. My cock throbbed almost painfully.

---