Page 44 of The Blood Moon Hunt

“Oh,” he says finally, the single word cutting through me like a blade.

I blink, my stomach twisting. “I mean, I’ve just never been ready before. But I trust you, and I?—”

“Yeah, uh...” He cuts me off, running a hand through his hair. He looks uncomfortable now, like he’s trying to figure out how to escape. “I’m just... I’m not really into that.”

The words hit me like a slap. My chest tightens, my breath catching as I try to process what he just said. “What?”

He stands up, avoiding my eyes. “I’m sorry, Selene, but I don’t think this is going to work. I thought you were... I don’t know, different.”

“Different?” My voice cracks, tears already welling in my eyes. “What does that even mean?”

He shrugs, his expression almost apologetic. “I don’t want to deal with all that... inexperience. It’s just not my thing, you know?”

I don’t know. I don’t understand. All I can do is sit there, frozen, as he grabs his jacket and heads for the door. “Ryan, wait,” I choke out, my voice breaking. “Don’t—don’t do this.”

He pauses, his hand on the doorknob, but he doesn’t look back. “You’ll find someone else,” he says, like it’s supposed to be comforting. And then he’s gone, the door clicking shut behind him.

The dream shifts again, pulling me deeper into the memory. I’m still sitting on the bed, staring at the door, my whole body trembling. The tears come slowly at first, and then all at once, until I’m sobbing into my hands, gasping for air.

The ache in my chest is unbearable, a crushing weight I can’t escape. His words replay over and over in my mind, each one sharper than the last.I’m not into that. I thought you were different. I don’t want to deal with your inexperience.

I curl up on the bed, hugging my knees to my chest as the shame sets in. Shame for trusting him, for thinking I could be enough. Shame for believing that someone like him could actually want me—not the girl who’s awkward, inexperienced, and more comfortable with books than people.

The candles burn down, their flames flickering out one by one, leaving me in darkness. Alone.

Chapter

Twenty-Four

SELENE

Iwake with a start, my body trembling, the echoes of the nightmare still clinging to my mind like cobwebs. My chest is tight, and for a moment, I can’t tell if it’s the ache from the dream or the lingering aftershocks of last night that make it hard to breathe. The room is still, the faint rustle of the forest outside muted by the weight in my chest.

I press a hand to my heart, as if I can calm the frantic rhythm beneath my palm.It was just a dream.But the sting of it still lingers—the memory of Ryan’s rejection, the shame, thecrushing weight of feeling like I wasn’t enough. And now, the fresh wound of Adrian’s choice layers on top of it, sharp and raw.

The pleasure he gave me is still there, humming faintly beneath my skin, but it feels hollow now. Unfinished. I shift under the blankets, trying to chase the sensation, but all I find is frustration.Why didn’t he finish it? Why didn’t he claim me fully?I was so close, desperate for him to take me, to make me feel something real, and instead... instead, he left me aching.

And worse—he drugged me into sleep, like I was some child to be pacified.

The thought twists something inside me, a mix of anger and confusion.Was it me? Did he think I wasn’t worth it? That I couldn’t handle him?The insecurities from my nightmare creep in, the ghost of Ryan’s voice whispering in the back of my mind.I’m just not into that.

I close my eyes, my fists curling in the sheets. For a moment, I let myself spiral, let the echoes of rejection and inadequacy swirl together into a storm that threatens to consume me.

But then, something shifts. A spark flares deep inside me, cutting through the haze of doubt.

I’m not that girl anymore.

The realization is quiet at first, a soft murmur beneath the noise of my insecurities. But it grows, gaining strength, steadying me. I’m not the girl who sat on her bed, begging a boy to stay. I’m not the girl who let herself be defined by someone else’s choices, someone else’s judgment.

I sit up, the luxurious sheets pooling around my waist as I let the events of last night swirl in my mind. Adrian’s command—“You will obey me”—still sends a rush of heat through me, but now it’s mixed with something else: determination. He knew exactly what he was doing. He wanted to leave me wanting, to remind me of his control.

But I won’t beg. Not for him. Not for Ryan. Not for anyone.

I am more than their games. I’ve survived rejection. I’ve survived shame. And now, I’m starting to realize I might be capable of more than I ever imagined. Whatever Adrian’s reasons for holding back, they don’t define me.I define me.

As the first light of dawn creeps through the window, I throw the blankets off and swing my legs over the side of the bed. My body still hums with the remnants of last night, my skin flushedwith heat, but my mind is clear now. If Adrian wants to play games, let him.

I’m done waiting for someone else to decide my worth.

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