Page 20 of Beyond Reason

In my mind, you come home and decide you love me.

I know, I know, you probably think I’m rushing things but I have been your wife for seven years. LOL.

Anyway, you come home and decide you can’t live without me. I, of course, am finally going to tell you that I love you and I have for a long time. Then we’re going to have kids. I actually have thought about this a bit and there’s nothing I want more than to have kids with you but I also want to spend some time together, just the two of us. We can go on vacation together, heck we can just sit on the front porch and watch the days go by, I don’t care. I just want to do life with you, hand in hand.

Anyway, I’ll see you in 3 days. Be safe and I love you.

Yours forever (if you’ll have me),

Jane

She loves me.

After everything… talking her into this marriage and then leaving her for seven years, and she still loves me. I’m not sure what I did to deserve her, but I can’t screw this up.

I grab the book and walk out of the bedroom. I take the stairs two at a time to get to her, and when I walk into her bedroom door, ready to tell her how I feel, I stop suddenly when I find her asleep on her bed. I tiptoe the rest of the way into the room and hover over her, watching her sleep peacefully. How this beautiful woman has come to love me is beyond me. It’s more than I ever could have imagined, and I know I need to do everything I can to earn her love.

I move to the chair in the corner and open the book again, scanning over the pages she’s written to me. When exhaustion takes over, I hold the book against my chest and close my eyes. I should go down to my room, but the need to be near Jane is overwhelming, so I sink farther into the cushions and let sleep take me away.

CHAPTER11

JANE

Something wakes me up,but I’m not sure what. I lift up and immediately wonder if Grant is having another nightmare. I stayed up for as long as I could last night, hoping after Grant’s therapy appointment he would come talk to me, but he never did. I stayed in my room to give him space. I feel as if I’ve hovered over him this last week, and I’m not sure if that’s what he wants or not.

I try to listen to the sounds of the house, and it’s jarring to realize there’s someone in the room with me.

When his soft snoring sounds in the room, I can’t help but smile. I climb quietly out of bed and make my way over to where he’s sleeping.

He has my notebook held against his chest, and he looks completely at peace. My palms itch wanting to wake him up, but I resist. I know he’s not been sleeping well. I grab a blanket off the foot of my bed and then tiptoe back over to him. I lay it gently across him, and I think I’ve succeeded in not bothering him until his eyes open and he reaches out from the cover, grabbing my wrist.

“Hey. I’m sorry for waking you up.”

He leans up, staring at me. “You mean hey, husband?”

I refuse to be embarrassed. “Yeah… hey, husband. I’m sorry for waking you up.”

He pulls me down onto his lap, and instead of resisting, I tumble on top of him. It’s not graceful, but I don’t think he cares. He holds me to him like I’m precious to him, and I burrow against his heat. He kisses the top of my head and then rests his chin there. “I love you, Jane.”

I can’t contain the gasp. I pull away and search for his eyes in the darkness. But before I can say anything, he continues. “Don’t doubt it. We’ve already wasted so much time, and I don’t want to waste another second. I love you, and I think I knew it the first time I laid eyes on you and demanded you marry me. There’s going to be hiccups, and I know I’m going to mess up along the way, but I promise to make sure to show you every day that I love you and you are the most important person to me.”

I hug him tightly and then pull back to search his face. “I love you, too. I know you’ve read it already, but I have to tell you. I love you.”

He caresses my cheek with his hand, and I lean into him. “So I need you to promise me one thing.”

He nods and blurts out, “Anything.”

I move the cover between us and flatten my hands to his chest. “No more sleeping apart.”

He starts to shake his head, and I put my hands on each side of his face. “Husband…” I start.

He grips my shoulders. “I need you safe.”

I shrug, feeling the warmth of his words. “Yeah, I know, and do you know where I always feel the safest? In your arms. Don’t deny me. If you have a nightmare, I promise you that I’ll make sure I’m safe before I wake you.”

He doesn’t want to, that much is obvious, but it looks like he’s giving in. “I’ve dreamed of you sleeping in my arms.”

I put it all on the line. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

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