Page 85 of Go Cook Yourself

“I’m not a scaredy cat, I just—” Suddenly, a car coming along the road sounds, and I jump through the door.

She lights the space with her phone’s torch. We’re in a kitchen. I gasp louder than I intended, and it echoes throughout the room. Light bounces off the marble countertops. “It’s bigger than my old place,” I murmur.

And it’s beautiful, too. Everything is laid out like it should be, with easy access to the ovens and enough space so that staff wouldn’t trip over each other. That was the problem with Clive’s place. He wanted to cram in older bulky, clunky equipment to save money, but that meant it was often breaking down, so we needed more mixers and even an extra oven just in case.

I brush my hand over one of the ovens. It’s grimy, which is no surprise, as no one’s cleaned it in a while, but it comes alive in my head as I envisage preparing millefeuille and tiramasu with it.

“This is state-of-the-art equipment. Why did the owners leave?” I whisper as if the ghosts of the building might find us.

“The owner had a heart attack, which isn’t unusual in the chef business when people are overworked.” Her comment reminds me of how I used to live. “His wife made him move to Spain with the whole family. His heart went out of the business a couple of years before. He cared about the place, though.”

“But why hasn’t anyone bought it?”

Next to me, she shrugs while shining her torch across the room. “I think he was looking for someone who wanted to make it a restaurant again, not a housing development or anything like that, and because it borders the cookery school, they can’t expand.”

“But it’s beautiful. If I had the money, I’d…” My thoughts battle. If I had the money, I couldn’t live next to Ruby, knowing we can’t be together.

“I know, right? But wait until you see the restaurant part.” She fumbles through the drawers, looking for goodness knows what. “There’s the badger.”

“Please tell me you’ve not found a badger in here.”

Her chuckles don’t fill me with confidence.

She slips through another door. Darkness surrounds me, and the chill that was missing due to my excitement permeates my coat.

A flash catches my eye, and suddenly, Ruby is bathed in candlelight. My arms bracket the doorframe as she lights candles, filling the room with a golden glow. Soon, the whole room is revealed. A fireplace in the corner brings to mind cosy winters and lights hanging from the ceiling. The tables need a good scrub and some love, but the wood is good quality, with a perfect dark-stained finish. The original bricks of the building aren’t hidden. Instead, they add a feature to the room. I turn in circles, visualising ivy along the beams and bottles on the walls so people can choose the wine they want with their meal.

All the aspects I chose for the restaurant with Clive that he’s since gotten rid of would make this place even more impressive. I’d combine all my wants with the beautiful things already here to make an Italian restaurant so unique that people would want to come here to sample the atmosphere and food. It’d be a cosy hideaway for delicious moments and family gatherings.

“You look like you’ve fallen in love,” Ruby says, drawing my attention to her.

I smile back at her. I have fallen in love, but I daren’t tell her. Because the feature that makes this room more perfect is her. I’m honoured that she showed me this place, although it can’t be mine. It’s given me hope. She’s gifted me hope. An intensitypropels me to share this as I sweep her into my arms and kiss her. I prop her on one of the empty tables.

Her moan is instant, and suddenly, I need to act on this emotion before I lose it. My kisses are soft and frantic, which has as much to do with the cold as my need for her.

“Garett,” she whimpers as I push her hair to the side and kiss her neck. She thrusts something into my hand. It’s a condom. I don’t need to ask why it’s in her pocket. I love that I’m on the same page as this woman. “But be quick. I don’t want to get frostbite.”

My deep chuckle echoes as she tries to undo my belt, but I still her hand with mine. The glow from the candles shows her eyes pinched in confusion. “This first,” I murmur as I shove up her skirt and push her knickers to one side. She’s wearing hold ups again, which must be enough to make her shiver, but it’s all heat against my fingers as I rub her clit. Her wetness quickly covers my thumb as I continue to brush her skin with my lips.

Her coat tries to thwart my access to her chest, and she giggles as my kisses find the zip rather than her cleavage. The giggle dies quickly when I suck her wetness off my fingers and slide them into her soaking sex. She grabs me by the back of the neck and fixes me with a stare so full of need and intensity that it takes my breath away. I thrust one finger, then a second, hard and fast inside her as she demands more with hungry kisses. Her tongue is in my mouth, ramping up the heat until I’m boiling, all while we shiver together.

She pulls back. Her lips are rosy red from the fervour of our kisses. “Fuck me, baby,” she demands.

My breath catches in my throat, but not because of the animal in her—I’ve seen that many times when we’re in my bed—but because the power she’s harnessing pulls a pain from my heart.

I think I love her.

She challenges me, makes me laugh, and makes me feel things I didn’t think possible. She’s more than I deserve, yet she lets me share in her sunshine for precious moments. I didn’t know this was what it was like to fall for someone. If I see something funny, I want to share it with her to hear her cheeky laugh. If I know she’s sad, I’m desperate to be there for her in whatever way she needs.

Ruby is the most incredible woman who has existed.

She should be with someone who gives her every piece of joy she deserves. I try, but I can’t change that staying with me will hurt her family. She promised her brother that she’d keep them happy, but being with me pulls her in two directions, and she needs someone who keeps her whole. She needs a guy who fills her entire heart and looks after it. That’s the only way she can be truly happy. It’s also why I have to leave. If I stay here, this thing between us won’t stop. It’s like a snowball that keeps tumbling down the hill, growing each day. If she’s going to have the things she wants, then I need to remove myself from her life.

But I must make the most of our last days together, too.

“There’s my Rubes,” I reply as she undoes my jeans and shoves them and my boxers out of the way. I slide the condom down my erection quickly and penetrate her with one quick movement. Her leg wraps around me to pull me in deeper. She’s ferocious with her fucking. Tonight, when we get home, I will cover her in kisses, but in this cold restaurant where my woman is bathed in candlelight, we fuck quickly and without thoughts other than how good it feels. All previous sexual experiences pale in comparison to when I’m inside her. She owns my body with loving, feral care. I didn’t know it was possible to crave intimacy as much as sex, but with her, I feel that and everything more.

Her moans and whimpers echo around the room. My balls tingle with expectation. Everything is on fire, and my need to come is already closer than expected. She senses it, too, becauseshe says the words I gave her the week before when she played with her vibrator under my instruction. “Come for me, baby.” That gravelly whisper shoots arousal straight to my dick.

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