Page 83 of Go Cook Yourself

“Number two,” I counter, “although Mary Berry is—”

“More of a baker,” Wicksy, Kath and Ruby say in chorus.

“Have I mentioned that before?”

Ruby replies, “Only once.”

“Twice!” Kath shouts.

“A billion times!” Wicksy hollers as Kath dips him before spinning him around the room.

“I don’t know why I put up with you all,” I grumble, but the corners of my mouth tug up into a smile, betraying me.

“Grab Ruby and dance. She’s waiting.”

I gaze at Ruby, who shrugs. She presses her lips together and taps her feet. My lady is indeed waiting to dance. I bow in front of her and hold out my hand. “Would you be kind enough to dance with this penniless, imbecilic, second-to-many chef?”

She holds her chin as if she’s debating it.

“Rubes,” I warn. Her cheeks flush.

“Of course I’d love to dance with the man whose skills pale compared to Mary Berry.”

I roll my eyes as I grab her hand and twirl her. Her girlish laugh fills me with light. Her eyes dip, and her eyelashes flutter. This cookery school is my home, and Ruby has quickly become my world.

“All I want for Christmas is you,” she sings along to the chorus while wrapping her arms around me. It’s safe to say that Ruby is no singer, but as she wails, I long for her to sing those words for me alone.

My phone vibrates in my pocket. It’s the scheduled call with Ciara. I haven’t given her an answer, but she wanted to share her plans for next year. She said it’s for my professional opinion, but I suspect she’s using it to convince me to move.

Ruby radiates the scent of passion fruit mixed with brandy, ginger, and other Christmas spices. It’s a bizarre concoction, but it smells like home. I breathe her in, ignoring the vibrations. I want to immerse myself in this fantasy future for a little longer.

“Is your phone buzzing in your pocket, or are you enjoying watching Kath and Wicksy dance a little too much?” Rubes teases me.

I can’t answer it in front of her. “I’m sure they’ll call back.”

“It might be Flora. I called and invited her to our family Christmas meal in a couple of days. She sounded keen but nervous. You’ve spent all this time with me, and I worry she’ll hate me for taking her big brother away.” Ruby’s concern for Flora and her desire for her to join the family makes hairline cracks in my heart. If I leave, which is more likely than not, unless Ruby tells me she wants to do the couple thing, then I’ll hurt this family I’ve grown to love.

At least Flora will have them when I desert her. The phone stops, and I continue holding Ruby close, but then it starts again.

“Garett.”

“Okay, I’ll take it. Maybe you should meet me at home.” I step away. “As much as there’s been a lot of laughter today, we’re all tired.”

“I won’t get any rest at yours.” My blood burns with prospects of what we might get up to tonight.

We’ve continued to be fuck buddies, but I want to be the boyfriend that I pretended to be weeks ago and not just the man she wants for sex.

“Besides,” she adds, “we need to do the next part of the baking. I need to get that last technique down for the competition. I’ll be here when you’re done. Now go answer that phone before Flora kicks off.”

I force a smile. “Hey,” I say to Ciara. I shake away the weird image of the hairline cracks in my heart, frothing with guilt. I lie to Ruby every day that I don’t tell her the truth about Clive and this job offer, and I lie to her whenever I don’t tell her I want more—a lie of omission but still a lie.

“You okay, mucker?” Ciara asks. “Is this still a good time?”

I stare warily at Ruby, who’s dancing with Kath, hercheeks pink from laughing. In five days, it’s Christmas, and my decision will be made.

“Yeah, all good,” I say with a throat that’s sandpaper dry and emotion welling up. “Tell me about these plans.”

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