Page 39 of But I'm Still Standing

Savvy

34 Weeks

Iwatch as Joe stands in the corner looking back from me to Shelby. I nod, knowing he is asking if I’m ready. Everyone agreed that I get to take part, but not until Shelby makes him pay for taking something so precious from her! She held onto her virginity because she wanted to, not because she was made to! She is catholic and was raised with certain values. She told me how excited she had been to give herself to Joe and had decided on it the night she was taken.

Shelby has been crushing on Joe since the first day he walked into her wedding boutique to plan my proposal. She never made a move on him until he went into her shop right after he found out about all the Saint stuff, and he realized her name was on the list. They have secretly been seeing each other since and she just knew that he was the one! Shelby has had her fair share of men falling at her feet, but because the one she was promised to died, they gave her some leeway given her willing sacrifice.

Max lays strapped to his favorite toy, very much how he would strap me in with my ass hanging off the bench with his legs spread and knees up. The black leather sex bench, that he had so many helpless women strapped down to, is now his own personal hell. The Saints found all of his sex tapes, including mine, in Max’s office safe at the house that I was kept in. He always had a phone orcamera recording. He loved taking pictures as I cried. There were surveillance cameras throughout the house showing footage of all the women he and Mark groomed and tortured as his pets going back at least fifteen years.

I hit play on Sins phone starting a song that Shelby wanted to hear. I look up at her as, “lifes’s a bitch,” by TAELA, fills the silence, and watch her let out a breath. No special outfit, just black leggings, and a black sweatshirt. She isn’t in there to look pretty; she is in there to take back what Max took from her! She glides her hand over the table of objects, settling on a large pink dildo and a large machete type knife! She holds the dildo out for Joe to add lube, he does and moves back over to his corner, watching as Shelby looks Max in the eyes as she slides the rubbery dick in his ass. He screams through the O ring gag holding his mouth open. I smile, knowing why that particular gag was chosen!

“This is my world now bitch!” She yells.

Once Shelby maneuvers the pink cock in his ass all the way, she starts to fuck him with it. She is yelling at him in between strokes, “Your ass is so tight! If you would just relax like I told you, it wouldn’t hurt so much! Be a good pet and moan my name whore!” She holds the knife up to his dick making little knicks on it as she fucks his ass! A sense of peace washes over me, little by little with every scream he lets out. Vivian watches, not showing an ounce of care. Shelby moves the knife to his thigh, cutting it open, “Bleed for me bitch! Just like I bled for you!” She screams as she cuts down his other leg. She stops, looking back at me.

Sin helps me up and holds my hand as we walk into the room side by side. He takes a knife from the table, lets my hand go, and goes to stand with Joe in the corner as I move next to Shelby. I grab Max’s dick, yanking it up and pulling it tight. I watch his eyes go wide as Shelby slices straight through at the base, removing it completely as she yells. His screams fill the room as I hold his skinny little dick up in front of him, before silencing his cries by shoving it down his throat. I grab his face, squeezing his cheeks as he chokes on his owndick. Blood bubbles out of the corners of his mouth as I hold his head still and grab his nose to cut off his air supply. I finally let go when his body goes slack under all the straps holding him down.

I look back to Sin who in turn nods and moves over to his mother. Vivian starts to say his name, but he swiftly cuts her throat with the knife he took from the table, spraying the clear glass she is held up against with blood before she gets more than the first syllable out. Her lifeless body hangs from her collar still chained to the wall as blood trickles down her naked body to the cold cement floor beneath her feet. Sin turns his back on her quickly moving back to me, wrapping me in his arms. Joe takes Shelbys hand, and we all walk out and go back to the couch without a word.

Knowing he died in the same way they killed my sister gives me more satisfaction than I could have imagined. I feel like I have avenged my sister’s death. Knowing she was murdered and being able to give Sin the closure of knowing what happened gives me peace.

I sit on the couch, cuddled into Sins arms as we watch the guards move the lifeless bodies out of the room and over to the incinerator towards the back of the cave.

Sin motions for the guards to bring Mark in. Cami walks in with MJ as moral support only if she needs it. Cami moves over to the corner and lets MJ choose what she wants to do to him. Alec comes running down from the back of the caves, coming in through the courtyard entrance. He enters the room with MJ, kissing her cheek before moving over to the bench to help the guards finish strapping Mark to the chair, face down and ass up. Alec whispers something in Marks ear, but not loud enough for us to hear, making him jerk and yell through the ball gag. He can’t move much, which makes me laugh a little. I will say that particular chair is useful for versatility.

MJ picks up a dildo with a spear attached at the tip, and a cigar cutter before moving over to Mark and setting the spear dick on his back and slapping his ass. She slowly walks up to his head. She pulls Sins sister’s picture out of her back pocket, holding it in front of his face.

“We are going to find her. I’ll end it faster if you tell us her name and where she is.” She holds up the cigar cutter and laughs as mark screams through his gag, what sounds like, fuck you.

“Don’t worry, just the tip, remember.” Her smile is anything but cute as she hands the picture to Alec, then reaches down underneath the bench, grabbing Marks dick as she gets on her knees to pull it more to the side as she slips the tip of his dick into the cigar cutter, snapping it closed. Sin gags a little as we watch the tip of Marks dick roll on the floor up by his face. Blood trickles out of his dick onto the floor beneath the bench as he wails.

“Wow! That’s bleeding more than I thought it would, I better hurry!” MJ bounces as she grabs the spear head dildo and gets directly behind Mark. “Good girls don’t need to be all lubed up to take it in the ass do they Marky, they should always be willing and ready to take it however her Saint sees fit! Take this and rot in hell you sick son of a bitch!” MJ rams the spear into his asshole shoving the dildo all the way in. Blood pours out of his ass as she pulls it out and stabs him over and over again.

I can’t tell where his asshole was when she finally stops, staggering back. I’m fairly sure he was dead a few minutes ago, but we let her have whatever she needed to get out. She is covered in blood and just stands there, taking deep breaths through her nose and exhaling abruptly out of her mouth, over and over. Alec moves quickly to MJ, steadying her before lifting her into his arms, taking her out of the room.

“You know where her room is. Cami, will you go help her get cleaned up please? Alec, help her and keep your hands to yourself or Cami will stab you in the dick next.” I yell after Alec. He tries not to crack a smile, but can’t contain his laughter when MJ says, “Yes auntie, we know!” with a huff. At least I know she hasn’t lost her attitude.

I can’t help but laugh a little under my breath. I look to Sin and the rest of my friends who have become the family I never knew I needed. We all look like shit, yet we are all smiling, some of usthrough the tears, not for the loss of who we killed, or the thoughts of what we all just did, but happy tears to finally be able to let go of all the hate we have had stored up for way too long.

“Can Charlie and I smudge the room with sage? I don’t want their tortured souls lurking around!” Cami moves over to a cabinet in the corner grabbing out two sage bundles and a lighter.

“Yeah, just let me get out of here first, last time you did that I coughed for a week!” Mia shakes her head as she gets up moving quickly to the stairs.

SIN

I take another drink from my glass and let the amber liquid sit on my tongue for a moment as I flip through my mother’s journal. My sisters’ green eyes taunt me as I stare at the picture I have sitting on the bar. I have gone through this stupid journal a hundred times in the last two weeks and still have no clue who my mother was. I don’t remember a lot about her but what I do remember was good, but I was four and my dad didn’t want us to hate our mother, so he told us what to remember. Now that’s been diluted to nothing. I also have no clue who or where my sister is. Fuck, I don’t even know her name.

Dr. Cowan let us in on protocols with Saint babies. We all have the mark of the Saint right after we are born. A chip is implanted in the heel of the left foot of every Saint baby born. You just have to have UV light to see the tiny chip in the shape of a fleur-de-lis. All of us born to Saints have the mark. Savvy and Shelby also have it. We all had to check to see if he was shitting us, but they are there. Too small to even feel. It amazes me that we have all walked around with a chip in our foot our entire lives. The Saints say it is to keep us safe and be able to track us if ever needed, but only if needed. No one questions the Saints, especially when it comes to our children.

We are born to lead and to serve. Whether from birth or mid-life, when you are called, you do your duty. The small odd shaped fleur-de-lis tattoo I received after taking my oath, you only get once youare married. I should have taken my oath and been tattooed on our wedding night, right before our reception. It signifies your duty to take a covenant and replenish the earth with your seed, which should only happen under the covenant of marriage. It’s laughable to me that they have all these rules with chastity and marriage, but only if the Saint wants that! They can have their pets and do what they please. What about the covenant? From what Shelby said, she only has a choice because her Saint died before they were married, and she was a virgin by choice. She basically got a good girl and stay while we find you another owner. Women are pets in their eyes. It terrifies me to think that Savvy could give me a little girl someday. I wouldn’t let anything happen to my daughter, but she also would have a choice as well. Apparently here in New Orleans there is a much stricter process than in most other areas because The Saints were founded here and have to keep their image as unwavering. Most of the families have abandoned the old ways of keeping a covenant or pet. Seems our generation taking over wants to change things.

One of the things that has been lacking in all the women who became pets because of their transgressions and had babies were missing biological fathers. Not all, but most were either raised by stepfathers, or aunts and uncles. A lot of the women who are still alive, are now covenants with families. The Saints want us to find the children before talking to any of them. Almost thirty years of Saints and non-Saints children lost because of that retched woman.

My life was much simpler when I was just a drug lord who dabbled in real estate, but being born into this world, yet not growing up knowing or learning about it, not being the one chosen to lead it. For the first time in my life, I feel like I have to prove myself worthy to exist. The Saints want us to continue with business. They just want us at the head of the table where my dad can completely retire. They have already designated someone to run things as I would who reports to me.

Me and the guys are supposed to stay on the legit side of things with real estate yet make all decisions with the drug trade. When inreality we are now heading up the team to find all the missing kids and their mothers. The Saints know they have a mess to clean up and since we are all personally vested, it’s our problem to fix. Plus, they want us to weed out the bad seeds as we find them. Vivian and Sylvia had help from other Saints, we will find them and shut them down. All of them.

I should be holding my wife in my bed, instead of torturing myself in the library because there is no one left to torture in the caves. Today marks thirty-six weeks of pregnancy. She has been blissfully happy since we left the caves that night. She hasn’t spoken of them or what happened that night, no one has. Cami told Charlie after they were all dead that she wanted him to help her cast a protection spell and cleanse the caves of the evil left behind. He said that when they began, the cave had a darkness to it he had never seen down there, and knew she was right. Charlie helped her sage and set crystals and when they were done, he said it was as if a white light had surrounded the cave for a moment. I still can’t imagine it, but if chanting is anything like praying, then I’m sure the caves are now blessed and protected. On that thought, I down my last swallow of bourbon and place the glass in the sink. I head into the bathroom and grab my spare toothbrush from under the sink. Savvy can’t stand the smell of alcohol on my breath right now, and I want to hold my wife. I know she is as excited as I am to be able to be with each other again.

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