Page 91 of Oh, Flutz!

“Don’t worry about it. You look fine.”

“You look fine,” I mock. “Wow, Young, you really know how to make a girl feel special.”

He just smiles, then shakes his head ruefully. “I can’t believe I never noticed before.”

“You thought it was natural?”

“Obviously!”

“Oh my god. You’re such a boy.”

“What, because I can’t tell when a girl islying?”

“It’s not lying,” I protest, and he grins, reaching for my braid and tugging lightly at it.

“Whatever. It works for you.” He grows quiet, then flicks his eyes over at me. “When did you start getting them?”

“The headaches?”

He nods, and I chew on my lip, leaning back in my seat. “I don’t know. A few years ago?”

“Did you see a doctor?”

I shrug. “They said as long as it didn’t interfere with training, I shouldn’t worry about it.”

“Well, you can worry about it now.” He blinks. “Not that youshould. I’m just saying you can. Like, if you need to.”

“I know what you mean.”Should I say it?I sigh. “I used to…take the pills when I felt one coming on.”

I can see theshitlook fall across his face, guilt written all over. Yeah, I probably shouldn’t have said it. I don’t want to make him feel worse for something that wasn’t his fault in the first place.

The only reason I was ever angry with him at all was because it was easier than being angry with myself. Easier than admitting the truth—that I have a problem, that it’s been making me worse, and that I had to do something about it.

I can’t keep taking everything out on him. I wish I could stop myself.

Bryan’s silent for a bit, shooting me a look. “You know…you know I didn’t do it to get at you, right?” he says quietly. “I was just…”

Worried about you.The words hang in the air, unspoken.

All I can do is try to smile. “I know.”

I also know that I owe him an explanation, one long overdue. “Listen, can I tell you something?”

“Shoot.”

“I’ve…pretty much been alone since I was a preteen,” I say, and he sits up straighter.

I swallow.Just tell him. Trust him. “I mean, I have my family, of course, but there’s only so much they can do from halfway across the country. World, now. And my friends at the center, well, there was only so much time for friendship when you’re training eight hours a day, and even less when you’re supposed to try to beat them in competition the next week.” I’ve never admitted this to anyone. I don’t think I’ve even admitted it to myself. I wipe at my face, then clear my throat. “I’ve never had a…a partner. Someone I’m supposed to rely on. Trust blindly.”

Something about the look on his face makes my heart full even before he opens his mouth. “You’ll learn fast. You’re a lot smarter than you look.”

I can’t help it, I laugh, and he just grins at me, shoving another bite of toast in his mouth. “Trustme, Andreyeva. It’s the only thing you’re ever gonna have to do.”

Iget a fulleight hours of sleep after our practice for the first time in recent memory. When my alarm goes off in the morning, I don’t even feel like a bear dragged out of hibernation.

I fumble for my phone, get out of bed, chug a glass of water, and get dressed. I’m halfway out the door and shrugging my jacket on when I feel a weight in one of the pockets.What the hell?I think, reaching in.

When I pull it out, I’m staring at a gargantuan, bulk-sized bottle of aspirin that weighs about the same as a week-old baby, trying to calculate the possibility of me having finally lost it and this one of those hallucinations Sanjiv told me about when I see the post-it stuck to the cap.

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