Page 90 of Blaze & Ajax

“That won’t be necessary. You were just in the hospital. Get some rest and come back tomorrow.”

“You got it!”

I left the store, feeling all that pressure off my shoulders. It helped my mood a little despite the heavy feeling of depression still weighing me down. All was not lost.

It was seven at night by the time I got home. I’d gone to Alpha’s, who refused to let me work tonight and told me not to worry. We argued back and forth because I felt fine enough to work, and I really needed the money. Alpha said he’d help me out for the next week, and then he’dthinkabout allowing me back to work. My mental health was more important to him.

At least he had a spare phone for me. It was old and needed charging, but I could put my SIM card in it and hopefully get it to work. Then, I could save up money for a new one.

How did I deserve such amazing people in my life? Because I cared deeply about them, it made it all the more scary that I’d lose them one day.

My apartment was filled with the scent of chicken, garlic, and onion, making my stomach growl. When did I eat last? Did I even eat? I’d forgotten, losing track. God, Aiden would have my head if he learned I hadn’t eaten one bite. That right there made me smile.

The sight of him cooking and caring for me filled me with such a profound sense of love. And it also filled me with despair and fear, especially after what I’d learned today about having a relationship with bipolar disorder. I had decisions to make, ones I didn’t want to think about yet, but I needed to consider Aiden’s life, too.

“Hey,” I said.

He turned to me and smiled. “Hey! Dinner’s almost ready. Would you believe it? I made fucking soup. Soup! I’ve never made that shit in my life, and it’s from scratch. I needed to look up the recipe, but I think it tastes okay.”

I wrapped my arms around him from behind, looking over his shoulder as he stirred. “Best boyfriend ever. Smells great.”

“B-boyfriend?”

“Yeah, boyfriend. Is that okay?”

He nodded. “Yeah… More than okay. So, how’d it go?”

“Good, I got to keep my job, which is cool.”

“Congratulations, Precious.”

“The Intensive Outpatient Program thing was… intensive. If I hadn’t had any suicidal ideations or Mom hadn’t taken her life, maybe I wouldn’t have been forced to go, but I did. I’ve got an appointment tomorrow with a therapist and one with a psychiatrist for the meds. They’re both in the same building, so that’s easy, at least.”

He turned to face me and rested his hands on my chest. “It’s a relief you’re getting all this help and that the state helps pay for it. I’m proud of you for going and being so strong to do it on your own.”

“Thanks, baby. You give me a reason, too. That and I don’t want to end up like my mother.”

He visibly shuddered. “No, we don’t.”

After dinner, we were curled up in bed, watching TV again. I was fucking stuffed. Aiden made me eat my entire bowl of soup and two slices of bread withbutter. It helped that the soup was fucking good. Aiden surprised me at every turn.

But now that we were settled in, it was time to talk.

God, I was so tired and would rather curl up to sleep for a year with Aiden in my arms, but this was too damn important, especially since he had his own special needs.

I sat up, crossed my legs, and rubbed my face. “Baby? I think there are some things we should talk about now that I’ve gotten some help.”

Aiden turned off the TV and sat across from me, seemingly so eager to listen to me. God, what a night and day difference he was. No. We hadbothchanged dramatically in such a short time.

“Yeah, sure.”

I took his hands in mine. “We need to talk about us.”

He visibly swallowed and nodded, saying nothing.

“I’m worried about us.”

His body tensed, and he tried to pull his hand away, but I wouldn’t let him withdraw from me.

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