Page 29 of Blaze & Ajax

“Hey, can I take my lunch break a few minutes early? A friend stopped by.”

“Sure, the floor’s covered.”

“Thanks.”

I tossed my apron on my stool by the register and stepped outside on the warm spring day, the sun nearly blinding me after being pent up in fluorescent lighting all morning. I lit a smoke and looked around until I found Cueball leaning against the large store window.

When he saw me, he jerked his head toward the street. “There’s a good ramen place nearby. My treat.”

“Hey, free lunch. Awesome.”

But my little conscience, which had been bitching at me lately because I hadn’t been listening to it, told me that lunch wasn’t going to be free, not monetarily, anyway.

I shoved my hands into my jeans pockets and followed him two blocks away. We said nothing as we entered the small, busy restaurant, waited in line, and then gave our orders at the register.

We brought our food to a long table with stools facing out at a window with a view of the city. Cueball and I still hadn’t said a word as I dug into my noodles, mixing up the onions, bok choy, roasted chicken, mushrooms, and marinated eggs with my chopsticks.

I dug in and took a large bite of the noodles and a sip of the delicious broth with a large plastic spoon.

“Well, are you going to tell me why you’ve ordered me to have lunch with you?” I asked with my mouth full.

“Clearly, this is about Blaze.”

“What about him?”

“You and Blaze have a thing.”

“We don’t have a ‘thing.’ He wants me to fuck him. Nothing more. Nothing less.” But even as I said that, I knew that wasn’t quite the truth. This whole situation was a clusterfuck with a lot of emotions on Blaze’s side.

Cueball took a bite of his pork, not looking at me. “Did he tell you why he went to you?”

“Blaze does what Blaze wants. He didn’t tell me shit, not that I didn’t ask him fifty fucking times.”

“Yet you still fucked him.”

I choked on my bite of egg. When I recovered, I took a sip of my ice water. “Yeah, well, he’s a pushy asshole.”

Cueball gave me a hard stare that made me want to shrink. “Can you stop being a prick for five seconds? I’ve watched you for months now, all of you. You may hate him, but you’re not as… volatile as Blaze. You can’t tell me for a second that you didn’t have doubts about agreeing to this?”

“I didn’t agree to shit.” I wiped my mouth and sighed. “Fine, I had a lot of doubts, but I don’t owe you the reasons I said yes to him. Blaze is a big boy. He can make his own decisions, as I can.”

Cueball wrapped the noodles around his chopsticks and took a bite, along with some broth, with his spoon. “There’s more to Blaze than what meets the eye. He’s got… issues.”

“Yeah? Well, we’ve all got goddamn issues.”

“True, but most of us understand our issues. Blaze doesn’t, or he’s in denial. You’re the last thing he needs.”

Fine, Blaze and I didn’t get along at all, but for some reason, I took offense to that. “How would you know what he needs or not?”

“I know him. You do not. Not really. If you’d get your head out of your ass, maybe you’d see what’s really behind his black eyes. He needs therapy, not sex.”

“Whatever, man,” I huffed and took another bite of noodles. Despite my defiance, I definitely saw something hurting in Blaze, but I didn’t want to.

“Look, it’s not my place to tell you his story, and even then, I only know a little, but the picture is getting clearer. I’m telling you this because he’s going to seek you out again.”

I shook my head and ate some chicken. “Nope. He’s done with me. I upset him, and honestly, I don’t even know what I did wrong, except showing concern about his cut-up hand and him getting all pissy with me about it.”

Cueball wiped his mouth with a napkin and swiveled on his stool to face me. “He will because he wants and needs to be put in his place, to give up his control for someone. Unfortunately, it’s not for good reasons. He sees you as that provider. Blaze needs someone dominant in his life. I think you can do that for him, but not with the way things are going now. You’re clearly clueless.”

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