Page 12 of Blaze & Ajax

“I’ll take whatever special you have on draft,” I said to the bartender when he asked me what I wanted.

Once I had my beer in hand, I spun on my stool to check out who was available. It was Sunday night, so the crowd was small.

I saw one guy with curly, dark brown hair similar to Nacho’s, but he kept his cropped into a fade, and he was as short as Blaze.

Fucking Blaze. He needed to get the hell out of my brain pronto.

The dude looked promising. I had this pent-up lust I needed to get out. My libido was off the charts recently, and my hand was getting annoying.

I walked over to him, who leaned against the wall, smirking with his bubble-gum-pink lips. He wore a red hoodie, cropped short, exposing lean but strong abs, and paired with skinny jeans.

He stood straight and looked up at me as I approached, licking those plump lips. The guy sure was pretty, but he looked like I could break him in half.

My preference for men had always been bigger dudes because I liked to be rough in bed, and I wanted someone who could take it.

I ran my hand over the back of his head, feeling his soft curls. He melted into my touch as he rested a hand on my chest. The bar was too dark for me to see the color of his wide eyes staring up at me, but they were light, like green or blue.

“Hello, handsome,” he said.

He felt all wrong. There was no lust or desire there until Blaze’s face flashed into the periphery of my mind.

Godfuckingdammit.

“Sorry,” I sighed, letting him go before dropping my unfinished beer on the counter and heading home.

When I walked inside my studio apartment, I stripped myself of all my clothes, opened my blinds, and leaned on the window as I stroked myself. My place was dark so that no one could see in, but I pretended they could. I’d always wanted to be watched, but I never had the guts to do it.

I spit on my hand and ran the wetness across my length. I didn’t waste time, going at it fast and hard, desperately tryingnotto think about or see Blaze. But as I got lost in the burning pressure with the need to come building, my mind drifted to that hungry fucking kiss. It had hurt, too, but it turned me the hell on as it did him. I remembered how hard he’d been, pressed up against me.

If anyone could take a pounding from me, it would be him, despite his size.

Soon, my body froze, and I spilled in my hand and on the laminate floor.

I panted for a minute before cleaning up the cum and myself, then I took someAdvil PMand climbed back into bed, still naked.

After tossing and turning for another hour, I finally fell into a fitful sleep.

It had been twoweeks since that fucking kiss with Ajax, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Every time my mind wandered, there were his damn plump lips, consuming the hell out of me. And fuck Cueball for calling me out on it in front of everyone! I didn’t talk to him for a week after that, but as always, he pulled me back into him without having to say a damn word.

I closed my eyes, still feeling Ajax’s hand pull my hair and fucking own me. He’d been so angry when I’d pushed him away, only to shove me onto my knees. Fuck me. I shuddered at the memory. If he’d shoved his cock into my mouth, I would’ve sucked him down without a thought. How’d he make me feel that way when I couldn’t stand him? It was like he knew what I needed, just like my Domhad all those years ago. And that shit pissed me off. I really wanted that again—Ineededthat again—but not with fuckingAjax.

I tried not to think about my Dom, to forget about all we’d been through, since he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. I tried to erase his name and what he meant to me for so long from my memories. No one fucking wanted me. After all that shit went down that day, I wondered if anyoneeverwanted me. There was no wondering. No one did—not my father, not my mother, and nothim.

As usual, when I thought about him, the memories would filter through, no matter how hard I fought them off.

“Who do you belong to?” he asks. He has me bound by ropes that bite into my skin. I love the stinging pain. Pain and pleasure combined are the best.

I’m face down, my legs bent underneath me with my ass in the air. Even as vulnerable as the position is, he always makes me feel special and loved. He takes care of me when I’m good and punishes me when I’m bad. Despite him controlling my body, Ifeelin control of my life. He knows when I’m spiraling and sets me straight and back on the right path.

When I don’t respond fast enough, he smacks an ass cheek.

“You!” I cry out. “I belong to you. Always. Forever.”

“Good boy,” he says, rubbing the sting away. “And I belong to you. You’re my special boy.”

I rubbed my chest over my heart at the memory, missing him, hating him. They all abandoned me. Lied to me. They never loved me.

Fuck himandmy mother.

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