Page 11 of Blaze & Ajax

“As if! We didn’t fuck! I fucking hate you all!” he yelled and stood before he stormed off outside.

“Asshole,” I muttered under my breath, grabbing my board and walking out in the other direction away from Blaze. Fuck him.

Why did I even care? It was only a stupid kiss to piss me off, and it worked.

Because you reacted to him, my brain insisted.

I pulled the hoodie over my head and lit another smoke as I got sprayed by the rain pelting off the overhang. I paced, unsure of what to do or if I should even fucking care. Why did his reaction gut me so much? I shouldn’t give a shit at all, and it only made me hate him that much more. He was such a fucking coward.

I heard movement behind me and turned to find Pippin, lighting up a smoke. I should’ve skated home, needing to be alone. “What do you want?”

“I just wanted to check on you and see if you want to talk.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t.”

“Okay.”

He leaned against the building with cracked windows and the brick covered in graffiti.

“Just go,” I said.

“Nah, I’m good.”

I rolled my eyes. If he wanted to talk, he could kiss off. I loved my friends, but I wasn’t prone to talking about myself. Besides, there was no way I’d get pissed at Pippin and Nacho, who were the sweetest out of all of us. Even so, they could be protective, too. They’d fight if they had to.

I paced back and forth, unable to stop moving. Why was I so antsy and agitated? How did Blaze make me feel this way all the fucking time?

“Blaze kissed me,” I blurted.

All my words came tumbling out and honest, explaining that I was confused, but I didn’t hate it either. That didn’t change my feelings for Blaze.

“Do you… like him?” Pippin asked carefully.

No. I hated him. But was that the truth? Maybe I was just fucking touch-starved. Ithadbeen a while since I had a guy underneath me.

I sighed. “I don’t know… I was really into it, but fuck, I want to punch the fuckhead sometimes… all the time. Or just lift him over my shoulder and toss him into the harbor. But… Shit, I’d never been kissed like that before, Pip. It was so…hungry. God, I still feel him tingling on my lips.”

Pippin gave me some advice, suggesting I talk to Blaze and see where it led us. I told him I would, but fuck that. Blaze wouldn’t listen, anyway. No, I needed to put that shit out of my head. Nothing would come of it.

After our chat, I went back inside with Pippin instead of heading home. Blaze was nowhere to be found, thank fuck.

Suddenly, all my problems were long forgotten when I watched Pippin walk straight up to Nacho, cup his face, and pull him into a deep kiss.

When they came up for air, Nacho looked dazed and so in love before Pippin told him he loved him.

We all cheered for them, finally admitting their feelings for each other. It was about fucking time.

They’d been foster brothers first, then lived on the streets for two years, and were best friends. No one was better matched than those two.

I didn’t want to give Blaze any more free rent in my brain, and I loathed how my feelings toward him had shifted just enough to where I didn’t want to physically harm him. Okay, maybe I still did a little, but I struggled to shove that kiss aside. I chalked it up to being starved for a man. How long had it been since I fucked someone? I couldn’t even remember, so it must’ve been a while.

As I lay there in bed, still unable to sleep, I gave up trying. I glanced at the clock, which read eleven thirty-five. I needed to be up at nine in the morning to work at the hardware store, but my body refused to give in to sleep.

I got out of bed and tossed on a pair of jeans, a T-shirt, and a hoodie. Patting my ass, I checked to make sure I had my wallet before sliding into my shoes, grabbing my keys, and heading out the door.

The best way to get Blaze out of my head was to put someone else in it. It was time to hunt down a guy for the night. Once I got my release, I would go back to hating him and forget that fucking kiss.

There was a gay bar not too far from me, so I walked several blocks. Inside, I was blasted with heat, stale beer, and 90s music, which was making a revival lately. Faith No More’s ‘Midlife Crisis’ blasted over the speakers and in my ears as I sat down at the bar.

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