Page 58 of Bound By Secrets

“I don’t know if I love or hate that guy,” Brad mutters, passing me and breaking me from my awed stupor. I almost laugh at his comment but the pain radiating across my face stops me.

“Are you all going to be okay staying here by yourselves?” Nate questions, leaning against the door frame.

“We’ll be fine. Much rather stay here now that those fuckers have disappeared.”

“Yeah, I’m in agreement with Grumpy. For once, I actually feel like I can relax whilst I’m inside this house.”

“Well, my dad told me that the two officers would be outside within the next hour, and they’ll keep an eye out for anything suspicious. They might also knock every few hours just to check that everything is okay.”

“We don’t need them,” Connor huffs, abruptly standing from his chair and storming towards the doorway that connects to the living room.

“What he actually means to say is thank you. He’s just complicated and angry at the world. I’m sorry.” Callum walks to Nate and pats his shoulder before following after Connor.

Nate clears his throat, glancing around at everyone who remains in the room. When his eyes stop on me, I see the sadness and concern in his eyes, and it guts me. I’m thankful for his concern, but I don’t want him to see me as some fragile, broken doll now that he knows so much and has seen what my father can do to me.

“We’ll get out of your hair in a minute, but, uh, Callie, can I speak to you for a minute, please?” My brows raise slightly in surprise but I nod and quickly drink some of my coffee before setting the cup in the sink.

As I walk past Ryker, he reaches his arms out in front of me, halting my movements. He places a soft kiss on my temple and smooths his thumb across my wrist.

“I’m going to head home. Give you some space. I’ll be back tomorrow, okay?”

“I’ll be okay, I promise,” I tell him, trying to ease the worry that I know is coursing through his veins. He presses another featherlight kiss to my head this time, inhaling a deep breath as he does so and then steps back.

“Nice to meet you all, and I guess I look forward to getting to know you all better now that you’ve wriggled your way into Callie’s life.” With that, he lifts his hood and waves as he strides out of the room.

Leading Nate upstairs, I can feel my palms starting to grow clammy due to the nerves currently thrumming through my body. I’m not sure what he wants to discuss, but I have an inkling that it’s about what happened between us at my father's fight club.

As I’m about to reach for the handle of my bedroom door, I decide against going in there and quickly swivel around to face Callum’s door instead.

My emotions are already overwhelming me at the moment. I don’t think I could handle sitting in that sordid room whilst we have a conversation.

I push the door open, letting Nate into the room first so that I can wipe my hands against my top without him noticing. My eyes scan the room for a place to sit. I see Nate heading towards Callum’s unmade bed and I decide to perch myself on the desk chair over by the window. Not too far from where Nate will be sitting but far enough to hopefully keep myself together whilst I’m internally falling apart.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” I ask, swivelling myself side to side on the chair.

He shifts uncomfortably on the bed and clears his throat before speaking.

“I just wanted to apologise about what happened between us. Now that I know everything, I understand that it was all probably a bit too fast for you and I don’t want you to feel pressured or anything.”

“Nate, you have no reason to apologise. I was enjoying myself with you and I would’ve loved to continue it at the time, but I had a momentary freak out because my head is all fucked up. You did nothing wrong. I didn’t feel pressured in any way, and you made me feel comfortable and wanted. It was different.”

His body visibly relaxes and he blows a breath of air out of his mouth.

“The reason you tensed up, was it from something that I did or said?” I roll my lips inward as I contemplate how to tell him the truth without hurting him or making him feel guilty.

He cringes when I take my time replying, leans his elbows on his knees, and drops his head into his open palms.

“It was the biting and mentioning how tight I was,” I mutter. He lifts his head, eyes meeting mine and I can see the guilt that he’s feeling at my admission. “I don’t want you to feel bad about it, Nate. You didn’t know and I assume it’s a normal thing for guys to say and do-”

“Okay, okay,” he says, interrupting me as he stands from the bed and walks over, crouching down in front of me. “Well, now I know, and I promise, if we’re ever in a situation like that again, I will remember not to do that. If I ever do anything that you don’t like or anything that reminds you of him, you tell me, and I’ll make sure to remember.”

I nod in agreement. “Yeah, okay, I can do that.” He smiles up at me and brushes his thumb across the edge of my jaw.

“You know it’s not your fault either, right?”

I close my eyes and drop my head, reopening them when I’m looking down at the floor.

“I know it’s not my fault that it happened, and I know that I couldn’t really do anything to stop it each time, but I do know that I’m in control of my brain. I’m the one that’s allowed it to mess with my head. I could’ve been stronger, blocked it out better-”