He nods; his eyes have this haunted look. “I didn’t tell her, but I gave her sufficient information to be able to figure it out. The way that Arctic and Anya came up with the code was so fucking sweet. So romantic. It was nice to share it with my fiancée. The future mother of my children. The first two digits were the day that the two of them met. I mean, how fucking romantic to use that in a code. The day they met was Friday the thirteenth. We joked about it a few times when the four of us were together. Anya was convinced it was a bad omen, and it turned out that she was right.” His jaw tightens for a few moments. “The next two numbers were the day they got engaged, and then the last was their wedding day. Thirteen, zero, eight, and twenty-nine. Lake loved it. She was a total romantic…or so I thought. I forgot that we even spoke about it. I didn’t think anything of it. We moved on. We found a ring and set a date. I was oblivious.”
“Of course you were. Lake was your fiancée and the love of your life. Why would you suspect anything?”
“I should never have given her that information because it led to her figuring out the code. It was stupid pillow talk. I got one of my best friends killed over fucking pillow talk.” His eyes are blazing. Every muscle is pumped.
“With the woman you loved. You can’t forget that part.”
“It’s no excuse. I’m an idiot. A complete fool. I broke every rule in the book. I broke his trust. I broke him. Arctic is probablythe only person I know who is more fucked up than I am…and with good cause.”
“What happened after that? How did Lake get escape? What about the shooter?”
“The shooting happened at the change of the guard. He used a silencer. It was a quick, efficient killing. If the killer had even a few more seconds, they would have finished Arctic off, too, but they didn’t have time. Maybe they thought they got him. There was so much blood. The shooter fled and is still out there. There is camera footage, but he was masked. He was dressed in the royal guard uniform.”
“And Lake? I know you look for her, which tells me she got away, too?”
Steel nods. “Yes, she did. The only reason I’m still breathing is because of my search for her…and my need for revenge. On the night of the shooting, Lake told me she was going out with a friend. She kissed me goodbye, my ring glinting on her hand, and left without a care in the world. I sat there like an asshole waiting for her to come home when they came for me. I was arrested and thrown in a cell. I was questioned for days…for fucking weeks. Lake never came home. She was never seen again. There are those who believe her to be dead, but I know otherwise. She’s in hiding, I know it. One day, I will find her and take her in. She needs to be held accountable for her actions.”
“That’s why you search for her so diligently.”
He nods.
“How is it that Ice saved you?”
“I was stripped of my title and charged with several misdemeanors, including treason, for which I was sentenced to death. Arctic handed down the sentence himself.”
“That had to hurt.”
“It was completely understandable. I don’t blame Arctic. I would have done the same if I had been in his shoes.” He rubs the back of his neck absently.
“But Ice didn’t think you deserved to be put to death?”
Steel sighs. “He felt that Arctic was acting irrationally after the death of his wife. He pleaded a good case for having the charges of treason dropped. Arctic was out of his mind with grief. He was lashing out at anyone and anything. He didn’t put up the best argument, and the Council ended up ruling in my favor instead of his.”
“Ice doesn’t seem like the type who would work so hard to save someone.”
“I’ve always been wary of Ice, but we’ve always gotten along. He was my direct superior at the time. We’d worked together for a long time. I naively believed that these were the reasons he defended me.”
“It wasn’t, though?” I lift my brows.
“Nope. As soon as he needed to call in a favor, he did. When he recruited me to watch you, he made it clear that I owed him one.”
“Me?” I widen my eyes. “The favor was watching me?”
“Yep.”
“So, you were fired and thrown out, with nowhere to go, and ended up at The Pit working for Roscoe.”
“Nah. I served some jail time, then I lived off my savings for about a year or so. No one would hire me. I was completely shunned. Then I ended up living on the street for a while. I was angry at the whole world, which meant I got into a lot of fights. That’s how I caught Roscoe’s attention. I’ve only been working for him for about a year and a half. I got off easy, considering.”
“You didn’t get off easy at all. You have to live with the guilt. Steel, the only thing you were guilty of is being a trusting fool. Offollowing your heart instead of your head, and that’s not a bad thing.”
“I should have known better. I gave away classified information, Jen.”
“You were young and blind and completely in love,” I tell him.
“It won’t work, Jen. Thank you, but don’t even try to make me feel better about what happened. My best friend’s mate died in his arms because of me. Arctic is lucky he got out alive. I will never forgive myself for what happened.”
“You told me earlier that I’m too nice. That I only see the best in people. You told me you liked the trait.”