Page 34 of Dearest Ronan

Awesome, though I’m not even sure if I mean it seriously or sarcastically. The moment I open my mouth to speak, I turn so his fingers lightly graze my hip while Jenny clings to his other arm. Electricity sparks between Ronan and me, but I’m not sure if it’s only in my imagination.

Working with Indy provided me with much needed separation from my former guardian, but California is my home. I don’t want to leave it again to recalibrate my feelings.

So, I address Jenny and ignore the electricity between Ronan and I. “Nice to meet you. I’ll leave you two to it, then.” My mouth dries, remembering that the last time I saw him, he was technically married to another, and now he’s with Jenny.

Before I can swivel on my heel to lick my wounds in private, Ronan grips my elbow. “Butterfly.” My stomach twitches at his former pet name. “To be clear, I’m single. Jenny and I are just coworkers.”

Jenny’s mouth forms an O, and she looks completely embarrassed. “I am so sorry,” she begins. “I promise, I’m engaged.” As if needing to show me the evidence, she thrusts out her arm and wiggles her fourth finger. Her diamond ring gleams under the lights.

“Congratulations.” I give her a close-lipped smile. Pleased, Jenny ventures off, leaving Ronan and I together again.

Tentatively, he reaches into his suit’s inner pocket, revealing a beautiful stemmed rose and a sealed letter. “I—” He abruptly stops, closing his mouth immediately. Rather than continue, a million emotions flash through his face, most of which I have no idea what they mean.

“What is this?” I slowly ask, unsure if this is a welcome back type of gift or something more.

“Just—Just read it when you’re ready. No pressure.” He then leaves me standing on my heels in the center of the room, while he saunters to the corner alone. When I raise a brow in question, he shrugs and quickly looks away, seeming to give me privacy.

I’m ready now. Right this second.

Ripping into the letter, not caring about the paper, I balance the envelope and rose in my hand as I carefully read what he’s written.

Dearest Anika,

A few months ago, I became a divorced man. I didn’t write sooner because I needed a minute to gather my thoughts.

Originally, I planned on writing as it came to me but decided against it. You deserve better than half-assessed ideas.

Every word—no—every syllable and consonant is for you.

You see, I found your letters to me. Your “Dearest Ronan” letters that started when you first came to me, specifically.

It was a lot to handle. Realizing you’ve always had a crush on me was. . . overwhelming. If you’ve always wanted me, did I deny you the opportunity for more?

So, when you left, I let you.

You needed to live. Maybe you still do.

No pressure, butterfly. I’m not looking over your shoulder as you read this. If you want me, I’m here. If you’ve moved on, I’ll still be your best friend.

The choice is yours.

I love you, Anika.If you choose me, I’ll tell you every day for as long as you’ll have me.

-YOUR Dearest Ronan. Only yours, my beautiful butterfly.

Holy shit.

I don’t look up yet. My chest thumps wildly, but I need a second to collect my thoughts. Pretending to read, I consider: do I want to pursue a relationship with Ronan? Yes! So much so.

My chest hurts, and my feet are screaming at me to fling myself on him. Until, tiny hairs on my neck stand on end. Sensing someone watching me from my left-hand side, I peer to the side. I’m met with deep brown eyes and the sexiest jawline to ever exist.

Ronan's eyes plead, but he quickly glances at the floor. Clearly, he’s trying to give me space while also dying inside.

I’ll put him out of his misery.

My dress flows behind me as I sprint towards him. My calves stretch, and it takes ignoring every instinct to not run. No matter how fast as I go, it’ll never be quick enough. We’ve been apart long enough.

His brows lift almost to his hairline, but I don’t give him time to mull over my actions.