Page 45 of The Rescue

“I think we’ve had too much wine because this is the furthest thing from being professional.”

I take another sip of wine because I need to do something with my hands or otherwise I’ll be climbing over him.

He runs a hand through his sandy blonde hair, and takes a long slow sip from his wine. His face is soft and relaxed, it’s nice to see him like this after the week we’ve both had involving our fucked up families.

“It feels good to get away,” he sinks back.

“Yeah, it’s nice to see you so relaxed, Especially after the week we’ve both had,” I smile at him.

His broad shoulders tense up and I instantly regret bringing up our problems.

“My mum is never going to reach out, and I’m finally okay with that. I have everything that I want in life,” his eyes burn into me.

“How are you feeling after the conversation with your mum?” He asks.

I’m completely stumped by his question, because I’ve never had someone so in tune to my feelings. He knows when to ask the right questions, and his genuine attitude makes my heart sink. Because I know this will never go further than sitting in this hot tub, he deserves so much better than me.

“I’m used to her comments by now, but I refuse to live my life the way she wants me to. I know she does it out of love but she’s stuck in a generational view of how a southern woman should be. I don’t want my life to consist of waiting on a man hand and foot, and to run a household with the cooking and cleaning. I want my life to have more meaning than that.” I sigh and look up at the stars twinkling in the night sky.

“What do you want?” He asks me, his voice is husky.

My head snaps to him.

His question is so direct, and laced with curiosity. I can see him leaning forward to catch my answer. From all the wine I’ve drank, and with him being so close, I feel heady and dizzy. If he would’ve asked me that question a month ago, I would’ve told him I want to live my life as a single woman and not be tied down, but now I want more. He’s slowly opening my heart, and showing me that not all relationships can be boring and loveless.He’s waiting for me to respond, and I take another large gulp of my wine to be able to have the courage to say what I’m going to say.

“I want a partner who lifts me up, someone who’s excited about my career and all that I do. I want a man who’s completely obsessed with me—maybe that sounds selfish, but it’s how I feel. I want to fall madly in love, and I won’t settle for anything less. But the truth is, I’m scared. I’m terrified of ending up like my parents. You heard what she said, and I can’t live like that. I’d rather be alone than risk being in a loveless relationship.

I can’t believe I just said that, but it just came spilling out. I haven’t even told Dylan how I really feel. I always say I’m not into serious relationships, but deep down, I don’t want to be alone forever. I’m scared to let anyone in, afraid I won’t find ‘the one’ and end up stuck in a loveless relationship like my parents. I glance up at Rabbie. His eyes are locked on me, his expression unreadable. He runs a hand over his sharp jawline.

I suddenly feel exposed, and feel like I’ve said too much and freaked him out.

“Sorry, I’ve drank far too much wine and I’m rambling on. Forget I said that.”

Rabbie floats from his side of the hot tub to mine, he plants his hands on either side of me, caging me in. My stomach drops as he faces me, his face inches away from mine, and his eyes keep landing on my lips.

“Don’t be sorry. They are all valid feelings, and you have every right to be scared. But I think taking that leap of faith is the scariest part. You’re a beautiful woman, you’d have plenty of men obsessing over you if you let them,” his voice is husky as he scans my face.

I grab my wine as a distraction and I gulp down the rest. I’m a nervous wreck with Rabbie being this close to me. His hands are still resting on the hot tub on either side of me. How does hedo this to me? He’s the only man I’ve felt like this around. He’s so easy to talk to, I never really talk about my overbearing mama or my feelings about commitment. After everything he’s been through I’m surprised he’s so open and honest.

“Thanks, you’re too sweet,” I laugh nervously.

“I’ll show you sweet,mo beag,” he bites his lip.

Fuck, the ache between my legs is so intense I squeeze my thighs together and try let the vibrating bubbles ease some of that pent up tension.

“You know I asked Fiona what that means.”

He leans back still not moving his hand from either side of me, and a mischievous grin spreads across his face and his half lidded eyes are smouldering.

“I was wondering how long it would take you to ask someone to translate it,” he chuckles.

“Why would you call me that, if we’re keeping it professional?”

“I think all professionalism went out the door the first day you burst into the cafe wearing those tiny little shorts. And, right now I can see your perfect nipples through that sheer bra. That’s not very professional, mo beag,” he drawls as he slips a finger under the strap of my bra. He leans in close to my neck, and his hot breath makes me shiver with pure ecstasy.

“I offered to change into a swimsuit,” I let out a shaky laugh.

“I’m glad you didn’t,” he whispers in my ear.

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