Page 29 of Kade

Mouth open.

“KER-BAHHHHHHHHHHHHPP! KER-KER-BAHHHHP-BAHPP-BAHPP!” Her mouth snapped open on each word like her lips were a beak.

Her head returned to its normal position and onward the crab-walk continued until another repeat.

Heather couldn’t walk behind her. She was on the ground, hugging her sides as she laughed so hard she couldn’t breathe.

“What the—” Logan started to say.

“KER-BAHHHHHHHP! BAHHHHHHHHP!” Snap. Crab-walk. Crab-walk.

This was Dinosaur Sam?

She was going to wake the kids. Or some of the kids.

I moved toward her, getting ready to pick her up, but the sliding door from the back of the kitchen opened. Soon after, we heard Quincey saying, “Shoo. Shoo. Come on. You can do it. Let’s go.”

Logan backed up a bunch of steps until he had a clear view of the kitchen. He cursed, his eyebrows shooting up his forehead. He snorted, laughing as Sam let loose with another, “KER-BAHP BAHP BAHPPP! KER KER KER!”

He almost dropped the pizza, and he had to sit in the nearest chair, looking back and forth from whatever the fuck Quincey was doing in the kitchen to Dinosaur Sam.

“Come on. Yeah. Good job, Harold,” Quincey cooed. The patio door slid shut.

I took three steps and plucked my wife up in one arm.

“KER-BA—Oh!” She squeaked. “Mason.”

I carried her into the kitchen to see with my own eyes as Nate’s wife led Harold into the house. She was bribing him, holding out lettuce. He moved forward, reaching for the food. She kept pedaling backward, holding more leaves for him. He kept following.

Sam blinked away some wetness in her eyes. Heather had moved into the house, but only made it far enough to lean heavily against the wall, bent over with laughter.

When she saw Harold, she lost it all over again.

Sam started laughing with her.

Soon both were howling so loud that for a second I blanked on how to handle this situation. I looked to my brother, but he was no help. He’d abandoned the pizza and was out of his chair, his knees almost touching the ground as he wiped a hand over his face. He couldn’t stop laughing.

Hearing those three, Quincey looked around and began trying to hold her laughter in.

She failed.

Logan looked over at me, trying to get ahold of himself. “Nate called it,” he said.

I had no idea how to wrangle these women when they decided to indulge and have a good time. Though, I was glad this was the problem I got. Back on the team, other players’s wives would sometimes get drunk. Loneliness, sadness, maybe basic selfishness came out. They’d want attention so they’d do what they needed to get it. Flirting with other men. Having affairs. Ithappened. It was more common than some of the guys wanted to admit. I was aware some of those same husbands were also cheating, so what came first? The chicken or the egg. It was that same sort of question. Or maybe it was that like attracted like.

Not my wife. Not her friends.

They got drunk and came back impersonating dinosaurs and trying to bribe a giant turtle to cuddle up for the night. I chuckled. I had no idea why Sam chose me, but I wouldneverstop thanking the stars for her.

I pulled her close and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

She blinked a few times, and a soft, gooey look melted over her. “Oh, husband. I love you too.” She reached up, trying to cup my face. Her hand landed over my nose, and she pressed a kiss to my earlobe, sighing into it. “Take me to bed, husband. Fuck me good. I promise I won’t fall asleep. I’ll hold my legs up for you.”

Logan lost it all over again, wiping tears from his face. “That’s just what every husband wants to hear. ‘I promise I won’t fall asleep’—this time.”

“Oh!” We all turned to Heather. “My husband and child aren’t here. They went home?”

Sam scrambled out of my hold. I didn’t trust her. I didn’t know what she would do. She might go to Heather or start keeping pace with the fucking turtle to ‘motivate him.’

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