Page 28 of Santa Has Tentacles

“As for your other question, reviewing the information again is understandable. Our ship in space must be maintained. I volunteered for that task so I would be able to more thoroughly research where I wanted to live and what type of humans should be documented.” Saint stroked my head as he snuggled me closer. “You come in a significant variety.”

That was an understatement if I’d ever heard one.

Oh, yes. I remembered.

“I’m glad you ended up here.” Moving didn’t sound like a good idea but petting the tentacle under my fingers got a soft sound from Saint. “Does that feel nice? The science people on TV said you guys don’t do recreational sex but my romance novels and the porn I’ve watched say differently. So I’m not sure what to do for you.”

Might as well make that clear so he didn’t think I was being an ass if there was something I could be doing. All the scientists the networks put on had blushed and nearly had strokes when asked about the fun aspects to our new alien friends…so they hadn’t been that helpful.

“Many of your scientists have a very narrow definition of sexual behavior.” The confusion in his voice was apparent. “We do not have the same need for sexual pleasure as humans and our bodies are not designed for it. However, we derive pleasure from touch and there is significant…satisfaction, maybe, from caretaking a submissive human.”

He made a cute thinking sound.

“One of the human mates I have met said we arewired for it.” The phrase didn’t come naturally to him based on how carefully he said it. “We are happiest when we have a mate. In humans, those that are bonded mates are always submissives of some form.”

Okay, so some of the romance novels were a lot closer to reality than I’d expected.

“Thank you for explaining that.” I’d mentally sort through it later. “But you need to let me know if I’m doing something you don’t like or if I need to be doing something to take care of you.”

Because I couldn’t read him nearly as easily as he read me.

Romance novels were going to make up for that, though. I was just going to have to do some rereading and notetaking.

“I will be forthcoming about any issues and expect the same promise from you, my Colby. Being able to list your physical responses does not always provide me with contextual information.” That frustrated him to high heaven as my grandma would’ve said. “I will learn quickly. Do not worry.”

“It’s not a race.” Or some kind of competition. “We’ll both ask questions and communicate thoroughly. We’ve done great so far.”

Fabulous if I was taking into consideration how wonderfully achy and orgasmed-out I was.

For the moment, anyway.

The gentle caress of his tentacles was making me wish I had a faster recoup time, though.

“You gave me a wonderful orgasm and I loved everything we did. Then you got me water and held me while I napped.” A-plusdate so far. “What would you like to do? What would make you as happy as me? As content, maybe?”

Being around Saint was making me overthink my word selection.

“I’m hoping you know what I mean, but let me know if I need to find my phone and pull up a thesaurus.” I wasn’t sure I was joking about that, but he made me smile when he let out a happy breath. “You like those, huh?”

“Yes.” His limbs tensed and squirmed for a second, giving me the impression of a toddler waving their arms around. “They are wonderful. Human speakers of English have created a fascinating language.”

I was really glad he liked how weird we were.

“We’ve got a lot of words to learn that all mean almost the same thing.” It was weird when you actually tried to logic it out. “I’m glad you’re enjoying learning them.”

“I must learn your language if I am to continue my work.” He wasn’t really specific about what that was, but he was excited about it. “It is what humans call awork-in-progress.”

“You’re doing great, though.” Amazing honestly. “But you’re distracting me. I was trying to make you happy.”

That actually made him laugh again. “Submissives.”

Were clearly cute but I had to try to frown at him even though his near giggle said it wasn’t believable at all. “Doms.”

More laughter escaped my silly Dom, but he stroked my head and rearranged me so I was sitting on his lap. “You would like to please me. Yes. I will not deny you that necessity.”

That was it…he’d done way too much research about subs.

“You must be put back to a clean state and your dessert is waiting.” His thoughtful look made me think he was doing an Angela Lansbury impression. “I will not dictate your submission in this case. Would you like to use water to become clean? I have a human shower as well as a bathtub.”

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