Page 91 of Gift from the Nexus

“Those were your memories. I was seeing through your eyes the entire time, yet you still hide who you are from me. You’ve been with all of us almost every step of the way. You knew my mom, but you said you didn’t know her feelings about me. You had to have known. You seem to know everything that’s to come.”

“Me and your mother were only allowed brief moments with one another. Enough time to know we played a role in each other’s lives and we should trust one another’s decisions unconditionally. I don’t know how she truly felt, although I can imagine it was a mixture of things, but she knew about you and Lyker from the time her gifts emerged.

“Unlike how you’re experiencing your own journey, your mother was shown all paths right from the start, and she made her decisions based on that. It’s how her spirit was never broken. She knew what would come and she prepared. Mentally, emotionally, and physically. I’m sorry I cannot tell you everything all at once, filia mea. That’s just not the way this works. You know that to be true. I have no control over the sequence of events. I can only say and do when the time is right.”

Yes, in my mind, I know that to be the truth. Just speaking from the experience I’ve gained from my visions, I know there’s an order of operations that have to be followed in the paths laid out. But my heart. In my heart, all this hurts. At every turn, people are having to be dealt impossible hands.

“Willow.” My name on Lyker’s concerned, sad voice causes me to sob unexpectedly.

All I can hear in his tone is an eight-year-old boy calling out for his momma, begging his daddies to go after her, protect her. He’s using the same strong but saddened tone with me now that he did then, and I’m going to drown in the river of sorrow it brings.

“Don’t take another step toward her until we figure out what’s going on.” Draken growls, forcing my heavy lids to open and see what he’s so worked up about. I’m shocked to find there’s a wall of people between Lyker and me.

I’m kneeling on the ground with my fist balled in my soaked shirt while Tillman holds my face tenderly, but the rest of my men, Gaster, Oakly, and her Nexus are standing in front of us. Blocking Lyker from getting to me.

“Let him through to me, please,” I choke out, trying my best to swallow my emotions down.

As gut-wrenching and heartbreaking as that was to watch, it’s not my memory or story to tell. It’s unfair of me to sit here and break when Lyker has no clue why or what’s truly going on. I don’t know if I’m strong enough to tell him either. I came here thinking I’d have to tell him what a monster our father is, but instead, I have to tell him what a warrior our mother was.

I don’t know if he’ll accept that, though. She chose to leave him and in turn, produce me. Yes, for the greater good, and he obviously was told, prepared for it, but that’s a hard pill to swallow. One I’m certain I’d choke on. I choke on it every timesomething else happens and CC as well as Elementra leave me high and dry with no answers.

When the wall breaks apart, Lyker rushes through them and kneels on the ground with me. With a small nod to Tillman, he lays his lips softly to mine before standing and giving us our space.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know touching you would cause something to happen,” Lyker says worriedly.

“Lyker, I…”

“Ask him if he will take you to his spot,” CC says softly.

“Will…do you mind taking me to your spot?” I ask quietly.

His face turns beet red at the mention of it, his mouth opening and closing with indecision. Turning his head to his Nexus and Aria, they all glance at the two of us with a mixture of concern and confusion.

Way to go, CC, that was obviously a personal secret.

Their laugh grates on my nerves this time because I’m highly upset with them, despite how illogical that may be. I know they’re doing everything they can for me, and realistically, I know Elementra doesn’t have much of a choice either, unless she decides to destroy the realm, but I need someone to be upset with right now. And they fit the bill.

“I didn’t know that was a secret. I’m sorry,” I say.

“How did you…never mind,” he says before blowing a breath out. “I will. But it’s a couple miles run out of the pack lands. I’ll have to transport everyone. Will you tell me what’s going on?”

“I will once we’re there. I wouldn’t have been told about your spot if it didn’t play some sort of role. It must have some significance to our story.”

He’s nodding, but it’s a timid agreement. He’s nervous and overwhelmed. “We’ll transport as one.”

“Can you take all of us at once?” I ask.

That’s sixteen of us. That’s a shit ton of people.

He scoffs, looking down at me like I just personally offended him and his capabilities. That small little teasing gesture makes me chuckle but also makes me want to cry.

Fuck, I hope he forgives me for my part in this.

My guys surround me, each giving me soft kisses and tender eyes before laying a hand on Lyker. They know without me having to tell them that I saw something bad. They’ve witnessed it enough times to know my reactions, so they aren’t going to pressure me to talk. They’re going to be supportive as always until I can say it.

“Ready?” Lyker asks.

Everyone murmurs yes, but me. I don’t know if I am. Not that I have much of a choice now, though, because he’s already opening the transport and pulling us all with him through the fabric of Elementra.

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