Page 106 of Manny

“The club will accept it,” Manny says. “The question is if you really have thought this through. We all know Riot is gonna flip if it comes out in the open.”

“Why can’t we keep things as they are?” Bandit’s walls sound like they’re going back up, brick by brick. “They don’t need to know.”

“They don’t right now, but if we want to be open with each other out in public,” I start.

“We can’t,” Bandit’s tone is brusque. “Not while Eli is a kid.”

“Don’t use that as an excuse.” I cringe when Manny and Bandit’s eyes meet and I’m in the middle. “We both know that Eli probably wouldn’t care less, say okay, and go about his business. He’s a kid, like you say, and we’re not doing anything wrong.”

Bandit isn’t exactly known for his quiet temperament. “We’ve had sex twice as a threesome, I don’t think we need to get ahead of ourselves.”

“We don’t mean anything to you? Is that it?” Manny looks hurt, his eyebrows knitting together.

Bandit shakes his head. “I didn’t say that.”

“Well, what then? You’re actin’ as if this is wrong or dirty,” Manny goes on. “Like we should be ashamed of ourselves.”

“Again, puttin’ words in my mouth.”

“Stop it,” I sigh. “No fighting in bed. We just need to cool off and not get hot headed. Bandit has a right to how he feels, and things are moving really fast, so it’s bound to feel awkward, we need to respect that.”

Manny runs a hand through his hair. “Well, excuse me if I don’t buy that. We’re all feeling how we’re feeling right now, and that’s pretty damn good, but he still has walls up that he won’t let us climb over. Maybe he never will. It’s just how you like it, right,Beefcake?Nobody can get close enough to hurt you ever again.”

“Fuck off.” Bandit snarls. “You might wanna give it five seconds. I’m still comin’ to terms with the fact that I sucked your dick tonight and I wanted to do more, give a man a break because I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing anymore. This wassupposed to be fun, a roll in the hay, and I was up for that, but this?” He juts a hand toward the two of us. “I didn’t sign up for this.”

“But yet you told me I was yours and you wouldn’t let me screw anyone else,” I say back to him as gently as I can. “You can’t have your cake and eat it, too. You can’t just tell me I’m basically club property?—”

“Myproperty,” he grits.

“And then walk away because things are getting hot in the kitchen. If you don’t want this, then all you need to do is say so. Before it goes even deeper..” I know this is hard for him, but living in the shadows isn’t healthy either. He can’t deny his own happiness because he thinks he doesn’t deserve it.

“Little late for that,” Manny mutters.

Silence falls between us.

“I should go,” Bandit says after a while. He shifts and I turn, yanking on his arm. “Please, don’t go.”

“I need to think.” He presses his face into my hair.

“Can we just cuddle?” I don’t want to sound needy, but I’m not ready to let him go. “Don’t leave mad at us just because we’re being honest.”

He wraps his arms back around me and I sigh, my beating heart getting the better of me as it races in my chest. The alarm I felt when I thought he’d leave overwhelms me.

“She’s right. We have a lot to think about, but just because you’re scared or unsure, or if things are moving too fast, doesn’t mean you have to split,” Manny says.

The closeness between them may have dissipated a little. Bandit doesn’t say anything else, but he doesn’t leave. I like to think that’s a little victory, but I also know that in the light of day, things always appear differently. When all the lust and heat has gone, it’s just us, and that’s enough for me. I’m just not sure if it’s enough for the two men in my life. The fall that waits togreet me is daunting, but I also know that I wasn’t lying about how I feel around them. I don’t want it to end.

I fall asleep with my men cuddling either side of me, and I’ve never felt more at peace.

It’s been six days, and aside from a few texts, I haven’t heard from Bandit. Manny says we need to give him time to cool off, that confronting his feelings is a load that takes time. We can’t go stampeding in to fix it when he’s still battling with how he feels. That seems worse somehow. I drop by the clubhouse to see Manny when Amber, one of the bar staff, grabs my attention.

“Hey, Lace?” she calls across to me.

I wave, making my way over to the bar. “Hey, Amber, how are you doing?”

“Aside from hiding out here all day, I’m fine.”

“Why, what happened?”