Page 88 of Bleeding Blackheart

I move my hips against his for a few more seconds, feeling ready to explode any second. “Just keep going a minute longer. I’m right there.” Gunner’s body trembles behind me while he waits patiently for me to come. My body halts moving while a fire starts at my toes, moving all the way up through my stomach. I hold my breath, feeling like I’m sinking underwater as my ass clenches as hard as possible around him before pulsating quickly, over andover. Gunner lets go of my wrists to lean against the bed, pounding my ass while he spills deep inside it.

He stays still until I’ve milked every drop, and then he pulls out delicately, holding me steady so I don’t fall.

When I turn around and look into his eyes, I see he’s smiling just as much as I am, and I can’t wait to see that smile every day for the rest of my life.

37

Gunner

Ilay in bed with Montana in my arms, her back to my chest while I sniff her hair that I just washed and blowdried. I’ve never seen it straight before. It’s even longer than it is wavy, hitting right where her bra would.

This day has been the first day in forever that I’ve relaxed. After reconnecting with Montana, I washed us both up, and I made her lunch. There was more work to do outside, but she didn’t want me to leave her upstairs in bed all alone, so I got Dallas to come back over and do my work for me. I also had him get us a pizza for dinner, and now that the sun is starting to set, my fawn is getting tired enough for sleep.

Her naked butt wiggles against my boxers. “What are we going to do tomorrow?”

Montana’s been feeling better for five minutes, and she’s already trying to wear herself back down. I comb my fingers through her strands, kissing her exposed neck. “Whatever you want. As long as it doesn’t involve that goddamn horse or any other extreme sports you have in mind.”

Montana snakes her arm behind her head so she can stroke my hair. “Well, there’s something I want to do, but I don’t know if you’ll let me. You don’t have to come with me either if you don’t want to.”

I wrap an arm around her stomach, locking her in place. “Montana, I am nowhere near ready to let you out of my sight. You can forget about going anywhere on your own for the foreseeable future. If you are going somewhere, I will be there. Where do you need me to take you? And why are you trying to go alone?”

She slides her hand out of my hair, bringing it lower to rub my neck. “I’d like to go visit Margaret’s grave.”

A sharp pain shoots through my chest. “What for?” I bite my tongue, regretting the tone I just used with my girl.

Her hand slips off my neck and wraps around her front. “I’m sorry. I didn’t—I don’t mean to overstep.”

I roll her onto her back so I can look at her directly. “Remember what I told you about apologizing? It’s unnecessary. And you’re not overstepping. I just—I just want to know why. I need a really good reason to go back there, Montana. I haven’t been back since that day, and if you want me to take you, I’ve got to know what for.”

Her tiny throat bobs when she swallows, and her compassionate hazel eyes meet mine. “I want to bring her flowers. I want to thank her for loving you before I knew you and for helping you become the man that you are today.”

My love for my Margaret will never fade, but my love for my Montana grows each day. I don’t know how a girl who’s been through so much suffering has so much love left to give. When I’m in her presence, the pain of my past hurts a lot less. She fills me up daily, slowly repairing the holes in my heart. There was a time in my life where my only goal was to survive. To keep pushing forward despite how badly I wanted to give up.

Montana’s helped me realize that I want to live. That the things I thought I didn’t want or deserve are things that I’m suddenly open to.

I never thought I’d visit Margaret’s grave ever again. I had no reason to, and I didn’t want to. Had Dallas ever asked me, I would’ve said no immediately. And even though I’m terrified that I might break down in tears as soon as we get there, I don’t want to tell her no. Just like Montana feels like she needs to do this, I feel like I need to do this to to finally forgive myself for what I did wrong and give my heart over to Montana completely.

I brush my thumb across the scar on her head that I’ve healed twice since I’ve met her. “We can go. I’ll take you first thing.”

Her eyes illuminate, and she wraps her hand around my wrist. “Are you sure it’s okay?”

I lower my face to hers and kiss her nose and lips. “Yes, it’s okay. I want to go with you.”

Montana tucks my hair behind my ear. “What was her favorite flower?”

“Daisies. Margaret loved daisies.”

She grins. “Daisies. Beautiful. We’ll need to get some before we go.”

I lay back down beside her, pressing my face in her hair again. “I’ll make sure we do. What’s your favorite flower?”

She looks over at me, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth. “Tulips.”

Tulips. I make a mental note to get daisies in the morning on our way to Margaret’s grave, and tulips on the way home for my little fox.

When I wake, sunlight pours through the curtains, and I squint, pulling the blanket back over my head. I stretch myfingers out to pull Montana against me, but her side of the bed is empty.

I shoot up, causing my head to pound. “Montana!” I swear to God. If that girl—