Page 2 of Riley Goes Home

“Now, Lily.” Carmen wasn’t a doctor at this moment, but a mother, and she grabbed her adoptive daughter’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “Let’s not rush into things.” The doctor came right back to the fore as she studied me closely. “How about you talk me through the science a little more? Trials can be dangerous and…” Her voice broke, but Carmen rallied quickly. “And I don’t want anything happening to either one of my girls.”

Being pregnant was hard. The swollen ankles, the needing to pee every few seconds as well as craving a food desperately only to feel completely nauseous when I tried to eat it, but the one thing that was driving me crazy was this. To my horror, my eyes filled with tears. Me. I was many things, but overly emotional wasn’t a word used often. Candy used to call me Mrs. Roboto and do that weird robot dance most of the time, letting me know when I was being overly clinical by conducting conversations with me in the stilted tones of a science fiction android. So being reduced to tears by Carmen’s response, by the way she clung to Lily’s hand, Lily holding on just as hard, shouldn’t be a surprise, and yet here we were.

Because…

Because despite the fact I had five mates who fussed over me in every way, I wanted what Lily had with every breath. My mother was dead, my father having died long ago, and I was never close to the rest of my family, so that left me here. Watching a mother be mothered by someone who loved her… For just a second, I felt a wave of jealousy so vicious it took my breath away.

I shoved that unworthy feeling to one side because I didn’t begrudge Lily her support network. She’d needed it desperately during her pregnancy with Evie. I just wanted a Carmen of myown, someone who’d been through all of this and could tell me with the confidence of experience that it would all be OK. Of course, that was the moment my babies shifted inside me, forcing me to gasp as my hand went to my stomach, feeling them press against me. It felt like they were already fighting for dominance inside me, my alpha sons.

Sons.

That was the word that broke me and put me right back together. I could talk about fetuses and zygotes with perfect ease, but son? The word could have been daughter. I would’ve treasured having a little Evie of my own just as much, but both words felt like they were heavy, laden with meaning, with dreams and fancies, because each time I thought the word, I saw them. Little boys with fair hair or dark, green eyes or brown–ones with their fathers’ eyes–looking up at me the same way Evie did Lily, and that didn’t seem possible. I knew it was. People had kids all the time but I… but I… I was forced to grab a tissue from the box and dab at my eyes as I fought to recover my composure, and when I looked up, I saw both women staring.

“Oh, I remember this bit.” Lily shot me an empathetic smile. “Crying all the time. Remember when I had a meltdown over that ad?”

“One of those charity drives to help kids dealing with malnutrition in Africa,” Carmen explained with a smile. “Lily was in hysterics. It took a lot of tissues and a big bowl of ice cream to settle her. For me, it was anything to do with puppies or kittens. If they got hurt in a movie, I was a mess.”

“So this isn’t completely unprofessional?”

My voice warbled disgracefully.

“It’s got nothing to do with being good at your job.” Carmen’s other hand slid across my desk and gave my hand a quick squeeze. “I don’t have to explain to you the hormonal changes you’re going through, but I can reassure you thatalmost every woman who goes through this has a similarly intense response to something.” She pulled away and I felt the warm imprint of her fingers left behind. “It’s nature’s way of preparing us for what was to come.”

Caring for my children. I nodded, able to honour my tears for what they were before wiping the last of them away.

“Well, let's talk potential risks,” I said, my voice stronger now. “Because I want to help you, Lily, truly. There’s too many women struggling to have children with those they love, and I can’t stand by and let that happen, but what we’re doing is obviously very experimental. There’s no safety net.”

Lily leaned forward, a determined flash in her eyes.

“Hit me with it, Doc.”

Chapter 2

Riley

Carmen grilled me harder than the ethics committee at Crowe Corp had, and that was a good thing. When I was forced to articulate what decisions I’d made and why, it helped me feel more secure in what we were proposing. But the interrogation had to end at some point, so Lily signed the intake forms for the trial and then she grabbed Evie as they left. I turned to my computer, ready to continue the work to make sure the trial was as safe as it was effective when a call came through.

“Your mother-in-law is on the phone,” Janet, our receptionist, let me know through the intercom. “Do you want me to say you’re out, or…?”

I smiled and said, “No, it's fine. I’ll take her call.”

There was a click and then the familiar sweet tones of Omega Vanguard, no, Eloise, came down the line.

“Riley!”

“Hi, Eloise, how’s things on your end?” I asked politely.

“Boring!” I heard her huff of breath down the other end of the phone line.

“No one ever told me how pointless retirement is, but let’s not talk about me. How about you, darling girl? How’re you and my grandsons going? Are my boys looking after you?”

As if summoned by her, my door clicked open and the lack of noisy entrance made clear it wasn’t Candy sneaking in. Ryan slid through the gap, peeking in to see if I was with patients, then smirked when he saw my office was empty. He had a big bowl of something that smelled absolutely amazing, the aroma having my stomach rumbling alarmingly.

“One of them is, Eloise.” Ryan froze then, staring at me in alarm. “Ryan’s just come in with lunch.” He waved his free hand frantically, as if to stop me from telling his mum anything more. “I’ll put us on speaker phone.”

That earned me a dark look, but I smirked as I tapped the button on the phone, then put the receiver down.

“Hello, darling!” Eloise said. “You’re feeding Riley every couple of hours like I told you.”

---