Page 92 of The Photograph

“Fine,” Jo says. “But I need to know within the week.”

Holy shit.That’s far too fast.

36

DES

By the time I leave the office at 7 p.m., the constant checking for Alex’s call has given me the jitters, and for once in my life I turn my phone off. A full-blown tantrum is building in my chest. To be left hanging like this … Goddammit. This is not the first time something like this has happened with a guy by a long shot, but Alex seems to think this is only affecting him.

I hoist my bag on my shoulder and walk the four blocks to the gym, pushing myself through a punishing workout on the treadmill and lifting weights until I’m red-faced and shaking. Afterward, the deli’s twinkling lights across the street draw me in and I buy the most ridiculous amount of food, shoveling a donut into my mouth as I stand at the crossroads weighed down by bags. It’s 8:30 p.m. by the time I reach my building, and I step into the lobby to find Alex sitting on the couch in his work suit and thick blue shirt, dark hair in some wild disarray like he’s been running his hands through it.

“Finally!” he says.

This makes me explode. “What the fuck do you mean,finally, Alex? You promised me a call this morning.”

He has the good grace to look a little shamefaced. “I got caught up in some meetings.” Then he rallies. “I’ve been waiting since 7 p.m. I’ve been blowing up your phone.”

“Shit, really?”

Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I turn it back on. “I was obsessively checking it all day and switched it off when I left the office.”

As it powers into life, sure enough, there are five missed calls and a whole flurry of texts.

“I went to the gym, then got some food. Sorry,” I mumble.

Alex lets out a long, controlled breath. “I’m sorry I didn’t call you this morning. There’s a lot of pressure at work at the moment. People are very jumpy, and they wanted me in early for some reason.”

Something soft worms its way through me as I study his sharp jaw and tired eyes.

“You wanna eat and talk about it?” I say.

“Yeah.”

We head into the elevator, and I eye him in the smoky mirrored walls.

“Are you staying over?”

He glances at his watch and grimaces. “I can’t,” he says. “My parents are watching me like hawks.”

And here we are, right back here again. My jaw tightens so hard it cracks.

Mitzi goes nuts when we walk into the apartment, and Alex bends down and combs long fingers through her fur, bringing a lump to my throat. She writhes on the floor in ecstasy.You and me both, girl. I’m already sad about the fact he’s no longer living here, and I didn’t make it to the gym this morning without him. Our little routine lasted for a snap of time, and now it’s crumbled to dust. I want him back here, curling around me at night as Ilook out of my bedroom window at the lights on the building opposite with his heat at my back.

I put the bags on the counter and pull out the food, handing Alex a bottle of wine.

“Open that up. I think I’m going to need it,” I growl at him, and he blinks at me. “For heaven’s sake, Alex, do you not think all this messing about isn’t affecting me, too?”

Frowning, he opens the drawer, searching for the corkscrew.

“Messing about? I’m just trying to get on a good footing with my family,” he says somewhat mutinously.

“You’re never going to get on a good footing with them, Alex! Do you recall that conversation with your dad when he came here? Do you remember what Dimitri said?”

“I had a lovely time with them last night. I can’t throw them all away for someone I met on Grindr, Des. They’re my family.”

A sharp knife slices into my ribs.Somebody he met on Grindr?That’show he sees me? Not a guy he lived a magical happy-dudes-together life. I suck in a lungful of air.

“Oh, excuse me for just being ‘someone you met on Grindr,’” I say, making quotes around the words. And here I was, thinking he was the love of my life. Silly me.

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