Page 80 of The Photograph

“But if I hadn’t been so obvious with your grandma … It seems so stupid now. I’m always too fucking blatant. I’ve been told off about it before.”

“That’s other people’s problem, not yours.”

“Is it, though? I should pay more attention to how I come across. I can be a bit much.”

I laugh at this. “It’s not too much for me, and all your friends love you the way you are. You’ve got a big personality, Des. Don’t hide that.”

He nods and props his head up on his hand.

“Anyway, I invited you to meet her,” I add. “I knew what the risks were. In some ways it’s not a bad thing, being forced into it. I could have let it roll on for way too long until they had possible partners lined up, and ended up offending my familyandanother family. Far too often, I take the path of least resistance. Deep down, I think I was hoping I’d never have to tell them, which, of course, is stupid.”

“But I get that. I never told my mom. My gayness was so obvious that it was never in question. I brought a guy home when I was sixteen, and everybody understood immediately he was my boyfriend.”

“Wow.”

“Right? That sounds insanely easy when I say it out loud. My family is crazy, but God bless them in this.” He rolls onto his back.

“Your friends are awesome,” I say.

“You think so?” He turns his head to stare at me, eyebrows raised.

I laugh. “Yeah. They cheered me up no end tonight.”

“They’re a bit inconsistent.”

“Isn’t everyone?”

“What do you mean?”

I roll over to face him, and he reaches out to push a strand of hair off my forehead that’s flopped down in my eyes. “We all change our minds about things all the time: New information comes in and we adjust.”

“I don’t know,” Des says with a sigh, staring out the window at the apartment block behind his building. “Despite what I said about how sex brings us together, it also gets in the way. It’s too easy to hook up with one another sometimes, and you’ve helped me see how it changes the dynamic of a relationship. Jealousy creeps in and gives you no time to enjoy each other as friends—if that makes sense.”

“Yeah, it does.” I laugh. “I can’t believe I’ve made you realize anything with all my awkward fumbling. And I’m certainly envious of how familiar George is with you.”

Des shakes his head. “You shouldn’t be. That boat has well and truly sailed. I think George, when he isn’t in melodrama mode, would admit that, too. But he likes creating drama, and if he can create some around the idea that I’ve got a new boyfriend, then he’ll do it. He was watching every time I held your hand.”

“It doesn’t matter if the boat has sailed, Des, he’s still done way more with you than I ever have.”

Des rolls into me with a groan and buries his face in my neck, kissing me and sending shivers down my spine. “I want to do it all with you, Alex.”

I put my hand on his soft curls, and he draws back, tracing my lips with a finger and giving me a light kiss, mouth curling up against mine.

“God, I’m looking forward to having you living with me. It’s like an unexpected treat.”

A warmth that’s been building all evening explodes in my chest. But so much is still hanging in the air. “All my stuff is there.”

“At your parents? Yeah, I was thinking about that. If you want to collect what you need and don’t want to go back on your own, I could come with you.”

“That’s generous, Des, but they’d probably have a conniption. I’ve got work on Monday, though, and I’ve got nothing with me. No toiletries. No clothes. No anything.”

“We can go out tomorrow and buy you some things. You can borrow whatever you want of mine. I’ve got a couple of suits, some smart shirts.”

I close my eyes. “Sounds amazing.”

30

ALEX

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