Page 29 of The Sin

Another lie outed.

But why?

How did any of this make sense?

Why were we separated in Capra, singled out as special with special treatment and restrictions, and special lies?

For what?

I curled a hand around my neck, massaging the ache, watching the men and women and children mingle. Slowly and surely, ubiquitous awareness spread through me, an innate feeling of rightness about this scene.

These people here weren’t the problem.

I was the problem. Or rather, Capra was the problem.

The breath trapped in my lungs released.

The tension unwound from my shoulders and neck.

I stepped away from the wall and into the melee, joining the flow of foot traffic.

The noise wasn’t loud, but it was incessant, coming at me from all directions. A low hum that hung over the place. A dull, rhythmic banging from somewhere to my left. The chatter of voices, the rustle of people brushing passed each other, the thud of hundreds of footfalls on concrete.

The shadows I’d seen last night were mostly brick, very little plaster, and built in blocks around the series of squares I walked through. Each square had a small patch of shrubs or a small tree, some appeared to be perennial while others were turned to brown stalks with the onset of winter. Desperate, pathetic attempts to bring nature into this brick and concrete world.

I was in The Smoke.

It was crazy.

A few short weeks ago, I’d never been beyond Capra’s walls. I’d never beencloseto Capra’s walls. The stretch of land between the town and the walls was off limits and guarded. If you were seen straying into that area, you were clearly up to no good. And I’d always been good. A model Capra citizen. That was the disguise I’d worn for eighteen years.

But not today.

I wasn’t snooping through my husband’s study or hiding in the lockbox on his truck to find the answers I’d always craved. I wasn’t sparking a fantasy rebellion in my head with all the things I wanted to change one day in the distant future. I wasn’t dreaming of what life could be beyond the walls, or having nightmares about what it most likely was.

I was right here, right now, walking in the open.

I’d thrown my shackles off.

Freedom swept through my blood like a river in surge, wild and turbulent and totally unpredictable. I didn’t know what I’d do with it. I didn’t know where it would take me. I didn’t know if it would chew me up and spit me out.

There was a dry, gritty taste coating my mouth, but that wasn’t the freedom. The air was different this morning. I glanced skyward to the endless pale blue without any traces of cloud. I couldn’t see the black plumes that sometimes billowed up from The Smoke, but it felt like I may be swallowing it.

I narrowly avoided a collision as a door burst open onto the sidewalk and a woman charged out. She looked to be in her mid-twenties, wearing a glamorous suede coat the color of dark chocolate and stiletto boots that disappeared beneath the faux fur trimming. Her hair was sleeked back into a bun and her makeup was artistic, eyelids brushed with silver glitter and black lines swirling from the corners of her eyes.

She noted me staring and frowned.

I smiled and blinked away, picking up my pace as I crossed the square. I’d walked too far down, and needed to start making my way toward the gate entrance. In one of the narrow alleys, I got caught behind a couple, a man and woman holding hands and not in any apparent hurry. Another door opened up ahead and a woman shuffled out.

She greeted the couple with a nod and, “Nasty north easterner today.”

“It’s due to blow out by lunchtime,” the man said.

“That’s what they always say,” she muttered. “I’m keeping my mother indoors today.”

They walked on together and I hugged their heels, not intentionally eavesdropping, but it would be rude to push passed them. The conversation wasn’t particularly interesting. I couldn’t decide if they knew each other or were just strangers passing the time of day, until the woman mentioned her ailing mother again and said, “I’ll stop by the center and refill her prescription, just in case.”

That grabbed my attention. The Center? As in the Processing Center? Was it some kind of medical institution?

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