Page 11 of The Sin

I jumped up and slid open the glass door. The cold air rushed in, whipping my hair around my face. I didn’t mind. I stood there and closed my eyes, enjoying the sting of freedom. My feet itched to run through the swaying trees, to chase that sweet adrenaline rush and clear my head.

I didn’t, and not because I was afraid of Roman. The little things about him that had gotten lost in the fog of yesterday were starting to return to me. Of course Roman hadn’t handed me over to the Guard as a warning, or to teach me lesson. He’d never cared about me breaking the rules, so long as I didn’t get caught.

So no, I wasn’t afraid of Roman and his house-arrest order.

But I wasn’t a wrecking ball either.

The entire Guard squad likely knew about my transgression, and certainly the council did. It would look bad for both Roman and me if I were spotted out and about as if I didn’t have a care in the world.

6

For the next three days, Roman and I circled each other like wary predators. We spoke only out of necessity. He seemed to be working longer hours than normal. I was trapped in this cabin, withering away from boredom.

My anger and resentment rolled through highs and lows with no apparent rhyme or reason. One minute I’d be grateful I had a husband like Roman, a warden with powerful influence, a man who found amusement in Capra’s mentality and didn’t give a damn about enforcing the restrictive rules.

And then out of the blue, fury would spike through me. What was I being grateful for? That my brain wasn’t being rewired to rewrite the truth? That my personality wasn’t being wiped so I wouldn’t give a fig about anything, including the truth? That I wasallowedto remain myself after doing nothing more thanseeingthe truth?

Then I’d find myself watching Roman and I’d remember how hard I’d started falling for him…and why. The warmth of his rare smile sinking into my bones. The tingle of something wicked, maybe even dangerous, when the gray in his eyes glinted silver. All those times he referred to my father indulging me, when in truth, Roman was the one who habitually indulged my troublesome ways.

He was darkly beautiful, arrogant and mysterious, powerful and indulgent, serious and careless, a strangely charming contradiction in my world and a pillar of strength.

And then I’d remember the lies, and the restrictions built on those lies, and it felt like the Eastern Coalition was just a sophisticated cage and we were the animals doing tricks for those in authority, those in the know, those who’d created the original lie and those who’d perpetuated it over the decades.

It wasn’t all Roman’s fault.

Maybe none of it was Roman’s fault.

But he was part of the lie.

That evening, I used the last onion and the last parcel of lamb mince for dinner. The kitchen cabinets were almost as bare as the day I’d moved into the cabin. Roman wasn’t exactly domesticated, but since I wasn’t allowed out to do the weekly shop, he’d have to step up.

When we sat down to supper, I served him my grocery list along with the shepherd’s pie.

His brow creased as he unfolded the note and read.

I smirked. “You do know where the grocery store is, right?”

He sighed, refolded the note and set it aside. “I’ll go in the morning.”

“Wonderful.” We fell into our usual silence as we ate.

He glanced at me a few times, looked as if he had something to say, but each time he merely put a forkful into his mouth instead.

The sentiment was there, though, and I decided it may be time to end the stalemate. I’d mostly calmed down, to the point where I was pretty sure we could engage without drawing blood.

“Have you said anything to my parents?” I asked, drawing his gaze to me. “About what’s happened, I mean? My mom must be wondering why I haven’t been around to visit. And Jessie. I’m surprised she hasn’t stormed the barrier yet.”

I smiled at that. It was a joke. Obviously Jessie would never storm the barrier, not even to see why her best friend had suddenly ghosted her. There was a reason the security wall around Parklands was only six foot high and easy to scale. This was the Council Residential District and no one was stupid enough to risk getting caught trespassing by a patrolling guard.

Roman had finished eating. He pushed his empty plate aside and planted an elbow on the table. “I’ve spoken to your father. He’s aware that you’re not available for the moment.”

Despite my rebellious attitude toward the establishment, the thought of my father’s disappointment in my reckless behavior carried a painful bite. “Does he know why?”

“I didn’t volunteer the details and he didn’t ask.”

He wouldn’t. He’d handed me into Roman’s care at our graduation ceremony. I was now my husband’s responsibility, my husband’s property. If my husband believed I needed to be unavailable for a couple of weeks, he didn’t need a reason. He didn’t need to explain himself. He didn’t need permission.

And just like that, my blood started to heat up again. I took a deep drink on my glass of water, giving myself a moment to cool down. “What about Jessie? Have you said anything to her?”