Page 25 of The Female

I nod, glad to finally be getting some helpful advice.

Silas is quickly becoming my favorite.

“We have no intentions of sharing you, and any visitors will be told you’re off limits. Should anybody ask, though, you’re to say you belong to Aziel. If it gets out that you’re Gray’s, he’ll be expected to share you with the other lust demons.”

I gulp.

“If Aziel is a virgin, why would he need a female?” I ask, my voice shaky.

Silas pushes off the wall and clears his throat. “He can’t have sex with you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t theoretically pleasure him in other ways.”

This is information overload.

“You look tired. Get some sleep. Gray will send somebody to wake you for dinner.” Silas turns and leaves without another word.

I don’t move, my body frozen as I wait to ensure he’s not coming back. I count to ten before working up the courage to step forward and close my door. The hinges are silent, but I still move slowly to prevent it from making a noise as it shuts.

My hand shakes as I switch the lock.

I’m sure if they wanted to enter, they could do so with ease, but I’ll take whatever false sense of security I can get.

Spinning, I rush toward my bathroom door and do the same thing, shutting it with a quiet click before locking myself in.

My heart feels like it’s pounding out of my chest as I press my back to the door and catch my breath. If I’d been asked five minutes ago what I wanted, I would’ve said it was to be left alone, but now that I am, I want nothing more than to have the distraction back.

I struggle to wrap my mind around what’s happening as I search the room, ripping open drawers in a desperate attempt to find something of use. I don’t even know what I’m looking for, but in my crazed state, I convince myself I’ll know when I find it.

The place is entirely bare, the entire room void of any personal belongings. Not so much as a speck of dust is to be found, making me wonder if this furniture is new. There’s no way somebody would take the time to clean the tight corners inside the dresser drawers or the tiny screws inside the vanity stool.

Still, I search through every drawer and crevice in the room before sinking onto the bed. I eye the bathroom door, debating whether or not I should snoop around in there, but I decide against it. I don’t know if Gray is inside his room right now, and I don’t want to risk him catching me searching through his personal belongings.

Lying back on the mattress, I sink into the soft sheets and stare at the ceiling. The beginnings of a headache are already building inside my head, the dull pain radiating from my temples toward my eye sockets.

I rub my forehead, grimacing as I massage the skin. Gray’s shirt rides up my legs at the action, exposing the tops of my thighs. I completely forgot I was wearing only his shirt, and I wonder when I’ll be given clothes of my own.

I’d like to have some bottoms, something to put more space between the incubus and me.

The distance gives me a clearer mind, and I wince as I recall our previous interactions. I practically threw myself at him on multiple occasions. It’s no wonder he called me desperate.

He might have hidden his lust today, but I doubt that will last for long. I shiver at the mere thought of being trapped by my addiction to him. It’s only a matter of time.

I allow my eyes to slip shut as my thoughts travel to Aziel. He’s hard to read but given the way he spoke to Gray, I know he’s one to stay away from.

My headache continues to grow as I rest my head on my pillow. It won’t kill me to get a few hours of sleep. I hardly got any last night, my anxiety about today so high, it kept me up. Now that I finally have a moment to decompress, I feel that exhaustion creeping up on me. Besides, I need my energy if I’m expected to join the three of them for dinner.

Being around them is draining, and I don’t know how long I’ll be able to manage it. Even when they pull back on the power their bodies naturally emit, I’m still overwhelmed. It sticks to their clothing and lingers in the air.

I’m hoping it only feels this bad because I’ve never been around it before. Humans don’t emit power the way demons do, and maybe this is something I just need some time to grow familiar with.

My eyes grow heavy. The thought of falling asleep feels scary, but I know it’s not something I’m going to be able to put off forever. Gray’s probably going to sneak into my dreams as he’s mentioned multiple times now, but there isn’t anything I can do about it. I rarely remember my dreams, and I soothe myself with the knowledge that even if he does make an appearance, I won’t remember.

I curl into a ball on top of the covers and shove my face further into my pillow.

There’s nothing I can do.

7

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