Page 31 of Essence of his Soul

“I’m fine, really,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. “Just… you know, a lot’s going on.”

There was a pause on his end, and I could almost see him frowning, trying to piece together what I wasn’t saying. I groaned inwardly. Malcolm was sweet and predictable, always knowing when something was off with me. But that was part of the problem. Everything with him was so... steady. No surprises, no excitement, just safe.

And maybe that was why my mind kept wandering back to Mark. Mark, with his boldness, spontaneity, and way of making me feel alive in a way Malcolm never could. And those kisses... I shook my head, trying to clear it, but it was useless. Mark was back, and I couldn’t stop thinking about him, no matter how hard I tried.

“Essence?” Malcolm’s voice pulled me back to the present. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine,” I repeated a little too quickly. “Listen, I need to set up my classroom before the kids arrive. Can we talk later?”

“Sure,” he said, though I could hear the doubt in his voice. “I just wanted to let you know we are finally drawing up the contract for this real estate deal. If everything goes as planned, I’ll be back home in the early part of next week. There’ssomething I want to discuss with you.”

“Of course,” I said, forcing enthusiasm into my voice. “We’ll talk when you get back. I’m looking forward to it.”

“Me too,” Malcolm replied, sounding a little reassured. “Take care, Essence. I’ll see you soon.”

“Bye, Malcolm,” I said quickly before hanging up and shoving my phone back into my pocket. I let out a long breath, leaning against the wall momentarily. My mind was a mess, torn between the man who had been a rock for me the last few months and the man who had returned, again turning my life upside down. I didn’t know what Malcolm wanted to talk about, but its weight hung in the air, adding to the pressure I already felt.

But I couldn’t think about that right now. I had a classroom full of kids who needed me to be present and focused; right now, that was the only thing I could control.

Straightening up, I grabbed a cup of coffee, then walked to my classroom and forced myself to focus on the task at hand. But even as I arranged desks and prepped my lesson, Mark was still there, lingering at the edges of my thoughts, refusing to be ignored.

Chapter 8

I pushed open the front door, letting out a deep breath I didn’t even realize I’d been holding. The familiar weight of the day slid off my shoulders as I shrugged out of my coat, hanging it on the hook alongside my purse. Mark’s SUV was gone. My house was almost too quiet, but in a way that made me feel like I could finally exhale. Stepping into the kitchen, I noticed a note stuck to the refrigerator.

Went to the mall to see Santa Claus again.Dinner is in the oven.

A smile tugged at my lips as I approached the stove, finding a pan of mouthwatering lasagna waiting for me.

“Now we’re talking,” I mumbled while reaching into the oven to pull it out. Mark was really trying to win me over with his cooking—like that was all it would take. But still, it was sweet.

When my cell phone rang, I was preparing to wash my hands and cut a slice. I retrieved it from my purse, cradling it between my shoulder and ear. “Hello?”

“Hi, sweetheart,” came my mother's familiar voice.

“Hi, Mom.” I kicked off my shoes and settled into a chair at the table, already feeling the comfort of our conversation. Talking to her always felt like wrapping myself in a warm blanket on a cold day.

“I haven’t heard from you in a week. How have you and Tyler been?”

“Fine,” I replied, but I knew she could hear more in my voice.

There was a pause before she asked, “What’s going on?”

I hesitated, unsure if I wanted to dive into everything swirling around in my head. There was no point in pretending;she always knew when something was up. “Mark’s home,” I finally said.

“Oh!” Mom’s surprise was apparent. “And how is that going?”

“Actually, better than I imagined. Mark fell in love with Tyler the minute he saw him.”

Mom chuckled softly. “Well, that’s easy to do... he is a little ham. How does Tyler feel having his dad around?”

I smiled, resting my chin in my palm. “He already knows the word ‘da-da.’ Mark gave Liz the holiday off so he could take care of Tyler.”

There was a brief silence, and then my mother asked the question I dreaded. “And how do you feel having him around?”

I sighed, the mixed emotions I’d been wrestling with bubbling up. “Relieved, happy, confused,” I confessed, the words tumbling out before I could stop them.

“How so?”