Page 9 of Essence of his Soul

There it was, laid out plain and simple. Mark wasn’t just talking about being Tyler’s father. He was talking about us, about trying to pick up the pieces of something that had been broken for too long. My protective walls shot up instantly, but at the same time, I couldn’t deny the flicker of warmth in my chest.

“You don’t get to just come back and fix everything, Mark,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady and remind myself of all the nights I spent crying, feeling abandoned, wondering where I stood in his world. “It’s not that simple.”

He nodded as if he’d expected that. “I’m not asking for simple. I’m asking for a chance.” He stepped even closer, his presence making it impossible to focus on anything but him.

“Expect me in your life, Essence,” he warned, his tone serious, a promise lingering in his words. An intimate warmth traveled up my arm and spread through my body, leaving me momentarily unsure how we would make this work.

He caressed my cheek, and I was ridiculously weakened by his touch. Mark looked down at me, and I instantly studied his mouth, still feeling those full lips moving confidently over mine. I needed to get away fast.

Mark pressed his lips to Tyler’s soft cheek and then mine before whispering softly, “See you tomorrow.”

I nodded, feeling the weight of his words hanging in the air. “Tomorrow.”

Hearing the front door open and close, I exhaled and realized I had been holding my breath. I kissed Tyler’s cheek, then lowered him back into his crib.

“Well, Tyler, that was your Daddy. What do you think?”

Tyler began gurgling and blowing bubbles all at once.

“Yeah, he has that type of effect.”Even on me.I still felt his touch clear down to the bone. Mark Saunders was back, stirring up all kinds of thoughts and ‘what if’s I rarely allowed myself to dwell on anymore. Nevertheless, I had asked myself several times during the evening if I had told him two years ago that I was pregnant, would things have been different?

I scowled at my thoughts.Why am I even pondering that possibility?I made what I thought was the right decision. Mark had never told me he loved me. He had never promised to keep in touch. Instead, he left and never once looked back.

Then why do you feel so guilty?

Tyler laughed, drawing my attention. He was fascinated by his new Elmo doll.

It was only on nights like tonight when I looked down at Tyler’s smile so strikingly like Mark’s that I found myself contemplating the choice I had made. I genuinely believed that raising Tyler as a single parent was the right decision, despite my older sister Tamara’s numerous lectures to reach out to Mark.

“He has a right to know,” Tamara would insist.

“I know...I know,” I would say.

With that in mind, I had written him three letters. When I never heard back, I felt confident I had made the right choice and never tried to contact him again.

Tyler tossed the toy aside and began to whine. I carried him into the bathroom, preparing for his bath.

I didn’t need any distractions. Tyler was my world. My attention had to be devoted to him. Anything else would be a waste of time. And the only way to keep my attention focused was to keep my distance from Mark. However, now that he knew about his son, that would be virtually impossible.

“What are we going to do?” I whispered.

My son didn’t offer any solutions, and I didn’t have any. All I knew was that Mark Saunders could turn my life upside downwith a glance, and after that kiss… I knew I was headed for trouble. Because if Mark was back in my life for real, I had a feeling nothing would ever be the same.

Chapter 3

After guiding my class to the gym for physical education, I strolled down the hall toward the teacher’s lounge, where the usual crew was gathered, clutching their morning coffee like it was life itself.

“Speak of the devil. Here’s the lucky lady!” Gretchen's green eyes sparkled with mischief as soon as I walked in.

I scanned the room and felt six pairs of eyes zero in on me, curiosity practically oozing from every corner. I couldn’t help but smile. “No wonder my ears were burning. What’s the scoop?” I asked, going to the cabinet to grab my favorite mug.

Tiffany, our always-adorable first-grade teacher who couldn’t let a moment pass without a laugh, let out a playful snort. “We should be asking you that question. Look what someone left for you.”

I followed her finger to a stunning floral arrangement sitting on the table. “Oh, wow,” I murmured, pouring myself some coffee before drifting over to the table, my curiosity officially piqued.

“The card’s right there,” Sandra added, her big, dark eyes locked onto a small pink card nestled behind a delicate sprig of baby’s breath.

I sighed inwardly, aware they’d probably all taken a peek already. I reached for the small envelope, feeling the weight of their anticipation as I opened it and read the words inside.

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