Page 121 of Sweet Wicked Vows

Yes.

No.

Damn him.

How could I have been so sure that I wanted nothing more than to put as much distance between us only days ago, for it to vanish into vapors the second I laid eyes on him?

“Because I know one thing for sure.” His voice lowered with a hint of desperation. “I don’t want to lose you. I know I fucked up in a colossal way, but I want to try and make it right.”

“You didn’t just fuck up, you completely and utterly betrayed me. Everything between us was built on nothing more than a lie. From the very beginning, you’ve lied, and you kept lying.”

His face twisted into something unrecognizable. Guilt? Shame? Heartbreak? Whatever it was, my stomach plummeted.

“If you let me explain, you’ll see that not everything was a lie. Please, can we talk?”

I shook my head. “It’s best for the two of us if you sign the papers. You made it clear from the start that you didn’t want this. God, I was so blind. You never wanted to marry. Why didn’tI see it from the start? You never wanted me. You only wanted to destroy my father. What was it you said? I was a means to an end, nothing more? Well, now I am giving you your chance to stick to your words and walk away.”

“I can’t walk away. You’ve changed me. I know I betrayed your trust, but I was going to tell you everything. I know you won’t believe me, but it’s the truth. That day you overheard us in the office, I was planning on telling you then.”

I scoffed in disbelief. “You had months to tell me the truth. You used me, led me to believe that you wanted to help me and that you cared about me. All the while, you were scheming with your brother behind my back.”

“It was no lie when I told you I cared for you. I love you,ma douceur.”

I love you, ma douceur.

I swallowed the strangled cry trying to rip through me.

“You’re right, I never wanted to marry. I was perfectly content being alone,” he said. “Then I met you. After all I have done, I know I don’t deserve your love. But I need you to know…”

My bottom lip trembled. “Please, stop.”

“I regret hurting you, and I hate myself for it, but I don’t regret falling in love with you. Not for one second.”

“Jaxon, I really can’t do this right now.” I stepped back, ready to close the door on him. “I have somewhere to be.”

“Can we talk about it over dinner?”

I shook my head. “That wouldn’t be a good idea.”

Spending time with Jaxon was like standing on the edge of a cliff during a storm. There was only so much I could do to fight against the winds before I’d eventually fall.

Stay strong.

“Did you know your father and my father worked together as new business partners? Not just that, but they were best of friends when I was a child,” Jaxon said.

I shook my head at yet another thing I didn’t know about the man who raised me.

“They met at the University of Toronto and decided to start their own vintage jewelry business in Monaco. It was a success within its first two years. But somewhere along the way, your father believed that mine was holding him back. Lexington thirsted for more, whereas my own father possessed no such drive.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because you need to understand the reasons I started on this journey.” His foot breached the doorway. “When Lexington realized that there was no future working with my father, he drove my father out of business by secretly investing in shitty stocks and making risky financial decisions with the company’s revenue. He bankrupted my family. But that wasn’t enough. Lexington started a smear campaign against my father, blacklisting his name against the high and mighty that he now rubbed shoulders with. My father became a social laughingstock, and his name meant as much as the zeros in his bank account.”

My father was no saint. I was learning that more and more each day. The amount that he hid from us, the secrets he tried to bury that allowed him to climb all the way to the top, it was too much for me to bear.

I wanted to remember him as nothing more than my dad, not as the man who ruined lives and got away with it.

“After Lexington took everything, my father turned to soothing his bruised ego with alcohol. While he was busy drinking away the pain, he leftmamanat home by herself raising four boys. We were broke, and those we once called friends abandoned us.” Jaxon’s shoulders tensed. “Mamancouldn’t take it anymore, she struggled to adjust to our new way of living and her lack of a supportive husband.”

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