Page 122 of Sweet Wicked Vows

There was no hiding the sob that escaped or the tears streamingdown my cheeks.

“When she died, I was filled with so much anger. So much unrelenting rage,” he said. “I didn’t know where to put it. My father was to blame, but he was still my father, no matter how useless he was. I think blaming Lexington and making him the villain in my story was easier than facing the truth.”

Another life ruined and for what? Money? Power? Status?

All replaceable things compared to the loss of a mother.

“When Frederic came across the opportunity to get vengeance, the young boy in me still blamed your father. I went along with his plan.” Jaxon’s throat bobbed. “I married you with the plan to use you to get unlimited access to Reynolds. Get in and get out in the year. But the more time we were together, living together, Thanksgiving, Christmas, working together in those offices, that’s when I realized what was happening between us was real.”

Looking up to the ceiling, I blinked back the fresh onslaught of tears, cursing myself for putting on mascara before opening the door.

“Falling in love with you was never part of the plan, but I don’t regret it. Because loving you made me realize that all that rage, all that hatred, it was worthless compared to my feelings for you. Your love healed that angry child inside me.”

My chest cracked open at his words, exposing my mangled patchworked heart. He loved me, any doubt that I had vanished with each agonized word.

And I loved him, too.

His dimples. His scowls. His dry humor and the way he made me laugh. His dark and broken pieces as well as the soft and light ones. I loved everything about him.

I loved him so damn much that it made hating him impossible, but it didn’t mean I forgave him.

“I’m sorry for what my dad did to your family.” It was the truth. “But you telling me all this, it doesn’t change anything betweenus.”

“Let me show you how sorry I am. Let me show you that everything between us was real. What I feel for you is real.”

My phone ringing echoed through the apartment.

No doubt Lola was wondering where I was. We had dinner plans with her brother Mal in the city, and I was already running half an hour late when I answered the door.

“Evelyn, your love has branded my heart and soul. Forever changed and forever yours.”

“I have to go.” I willed myself to close the door before I splintered into a million pieces once again.

“Don’t make me sign these.” He dropped the divorce papers. “Asking me to sign these is like asking me to rip out my heart with my own hands. I can’t do it, not when there’s still a chance for us.”

My own heart dipped. “I don’t think there is a chance for us, Jaxon. You hurt me worse than anyone has before. Despite hating myself every day for how I feel about you, I don’t think I’ll ever forgive you.”

Even Laurence walking out without warning didn’t hurt as deep.

“All I am asking is a chance to earn your forgiveness,” he pleaded. “I’ll get down on my knees and beg if that’s what you want.” He didn’t hesitate, dropping to his knees with a thud. “Just one chance to show you that me and you? We are worth fighting for.”

“Some battles aren’t worth fighting for.”

“You’re worth it, Evelyn. I’ll fight for you until there’s nothing left of me. I’ll fight for you until the sun no longer needs the moon,” he said softly. “I let you walk away once. I won’t make that same mistake again.”

Silence stretched between us as I finally found the strength to close the door.

The final image of Jaxon on his knees, purple rings circling his eyes, and his face lined with fierce determination replayed in my mind throughout dinner, making me the worst dinner guest possible.

Thankfully, Mal and Lola made up for my lack of conversation.

My dinner remained untouched as all I could think about was how my resolve was slowly breaking down.

The grounds for our entire marriage was a farce.

One big lie.

There was no reversing that, no matter how much I missed him.

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