Page 14 of Courting Clemson

The coaches’ office was connected to the locker room, so I didn’t have to go far to find them. I knocked on the door and waited for them to call out for me to enter.

When I opened the door, two of the coaches turned in their swivel chairs to face me.

“Hi,” I said quietly. “Do you have a minute?”

The team’s head coach was not present, but these two assistants did not look surprised to see me. Although, that could have been my paranoid imagination.

“I figured you might want to talk,” my female assistant coach, Jo, said.

Okay, so it wasn’t my imagination that they weren’t shocked by my visit. Glad to see my perception wasn’t that off.

The male coach said, “We just got the academic probation roster, and your name is on it. Do you want to explain that?”

I stood there dumbstruck. Even though I had rehearsed over and over what I would say to them, I was so embarrassed and uncomfortable. Now that I was standing here, I couldn’t form a sentence in my own defense.

So he took the opportunity to continue talking. “We probably don’t have to tell you what a disappointment this is, Farsay. You’ve become a real asset to our team, and it’s gonna hurt our chances in districts with you out of the pool. Have you spoken to your professors?”

This was good. A direct question. I had an answer for this.

“Yes. I emailed the three professors yesterday. Since we’ve been busy all day today, I haven’t had a chance to check if they’ve responded.”

Of course, that was total bullshit, and we all knew it. Cell phones got emails too, but that was the automatic excuse that came out of my mouth.

I quickly added, “I’m hoping they will give me an opportunity to earn some extra credit or something… I don’t know.”

Jo stood and walked over to where I was frozen in place just inside the door. “How did you let this happen? The expectations of the university and of the team were clearly outlined to you when you accepted your scholarship. Were they not?”

Damn. I didn’t expect her to be the heavy in this exchange.

I nodded. “They were.”

Now, her tone softened. “So what happened? Three separate classes, Clemson? You better pray for a miracle, girl.”

“I’m not really sure. I think it was just too much. You know, the credit load. I didn’t take things as seriously as I should have, and by the time I realized what was going on, it was too late to recover. But you have to understand how much this means to me. Swimming for this school, being a part of this team, learning from this staff. I’m willing to do whatever I have to for a second chance.”

I was near tears by the time all that came out, so I stopped talking and took a deep breath. There really wasn’t much more I could say anyway.

My other coach listened quietly before saying, “It’s up to your professors now. If you had come to us mid-semester and told us you were struggling, we could have done something. We would have had options. At this point, only the professors can change grades.”

“But can you talk to them on my behalf? I mean, if that’s something you are willing to do.” I had to try everything here. My ass was on the line. One fat tear escaped, and I angrily wiped it away and hoped they didn’t notice.

Jo let out a heavy sigh. “I’ll see what I can do, but I can’t promise anything.”

“Most of the professors at this school don’t put a high value on the sports programs,” the other coach said. “I wouldn’t hold out too much hope.”

“I understand,” I said and hung my head. I was so ashamed to be in this situation. Especially because it was my own doing.

“Let us know if you hear back from any of them, and we’ll talk with Coach Monroe about what we can do. Now get out of here,” Jo said in lieu of a normal goodbye, but it wasn’t necessarily mean. She always ended conversations similarly.

The short drive to our bungalow wasn’t enough time to pull myself together. I ended up lapping the neighborhood a few times while I finished crying in private. The gravity of the situation sat heavily on my entire body, and the last thing I wanted to do was chat with my roommates.

There were no cars in the driveway, but that didn’t mean they weren’t here. Being among the few near campus with cars, we all often loaned them to friends. Grace way more often than me, but I did it on occasion too.

Inside the house, all the lights were out, and the blinds were still closed. The only sound was the quiet whirr of the air-conditioner as the old unit worked overtime to keep the place cool. I grabbed an electrolyte drink from the refrigerator and went to my room.

Dropping my bag right inside the door, I face-planted on my bed and stayed there for a long time. I wanted to drift off to sleep and ignore this whole problem but couldn’t quiet my thoughts long enough to get there. And the whole time, instead of stressing about the failing grades I should’ve been most worried about, I couldn’t shake thoughts of that guy from the shelter and his mystical blue eyes.

It made sense why my teammates were so taken with their businessmen. It was so much easier today to have a conversation with Luke than any other guy my own age. He was at that stage of maturation where he was comfortable in his own skin.

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