Page 20 of Saving Shepperd

“Was that the first time you told anyone? Ever?”

I couldn’t speak. I’d already said enough anyway. I looked down at my feet and studied the pattern on my socks.

“Shep?”

Finally, I just nodded. Tears were fighting to break free and backflowing into my throat. I knew if I used my voice, it would be like turning a dam’s release valve, and it would be hours before I felt in control again.

Without another word, Law stepped closer and pulled me into his arms. He didn’t need me to explain or embellish, he was content with what I already shared. Being in his arms felt so good. So safe and comforting. Quickly the peace I felt turned into exhaustion, and I could barely stay on my feet.

“Hey, hey?” He ducked down to be at eye level. “What’s going on? Do you want to lie down? Are you okay?”

Again, I just nodded, and then a third time. He guided me to the bed and stood at the side while I climbed onto the mattress. Watching him through half-closed eyes, I could see the indecisiveness in his posture but couldn’t muster the strength to alleviate it.

Finally, he asked, “Can I lie down with you? Hold you more?”

Seeing this normally confident, dominant man so unsure of himself turned me on more than hearing him direct me. He showed me vulnerability, and I found it extremely attractive. Made him more real and attainable. Up until that point, I went back and forth trying to figure out what the man saw in me. What could a broken, screwed-up me offer a put-together, confident man like him?

“I would like that,” I mumbled, and he climbed onto his bed and fit his body against mine. He draped his long arm over my hip and clutched my hand in his. Within minutes we were both sound asleep.

Hours later I woke, completely disoriented. The room was lit only by faint lights that were built into the electrical outlets. Law had rolled onto his back in sleep, so just one side of my body was warm where we pressed together. The opposite side had the chill of the still air in the quiet room. My stirring woke him almost instantly.

“I’m sorry,” I rushed out and stuttered as he turned toward me and wrapped me in his arms. The man was so handsome it was arresting. In the dimly lit room, the hard angles of his face were more pronounced where shadows played with his Adonis-like geometry.

“What are you apologizing for? This is my idea of heaven right here.” He grinned and crushed me closer. All I could manage in reply was a blank stare.

“Heaven?”

“Waking up and you’re still here,” he explained while his smile spread to my lips too.

He kissed me softly. At first, anyway. But now that we both had rested a bit and maybe felt a little bolder in the darkened room, the intensity of our connection ramped up quickly. He swept into my mouth with his tongue, and a husky whimper escaped when I parted more for his exploration.

There was a brief moment when my brain tried to ruin things and overanalyze what he might think of the sound I made. But as though he sensed me disengaging, Law ground his erection into my thigh, and I was instantly relieved to see—or feel, rather—that he enjoyed my unedited reaction.

We made out like teenagers for about twenty minutes, then I breathlessly pulled back. “Okay, Danger. You’re earning your nickname with scary precision.”

He laughed, and I was instantly aroused. I’m not sure I’d ever been turned on by a guy’s laugh before, but Law’s was so genuine and pure. It shot straight to my pussy and reverberated there. In an effort to not embarrass myself by giving in to pure desire and mounting him, I squeezed my eyes shut to block out the onslaught of stimulation.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, fading from playful to serious with one question.

“My God, nothing,” I sighed with a grin, eyes still closed. “Nothing at all. I can’t even remember the last time I said that and meant it.”

“Why are you squeezing your eyes shut like that?”

So I gave it to him. I just blurted out what I was feeling like I was overturning a wheelbarrow filled with thoughts and words right at his feet.

“It’s hard to look at you,” I word-vomited. “You’re so good-looking.”

He rolled his eyes, and I poked him in the abdomen.

“I’m not joking,” I continued. “I’m being boldly honest. Looking at you makes my body feel ways.” I paused there, trying to put words to the sensations but came up short. “I’m not sure what’s even happening. It’s terrifying and exhilarating at the same time.”

Immediately I wanted to burrow under the sumptuous bedding and hide from all the thoughts I had just admitted.

His stillness and attentiveness were more unnerving than his usual animated feedback. Instead of saying anything to break the excruciating silence, he moved closer, then closer still until our mouths were less than an inch apart.

“Can I kiss you again? I was rather enjoying that,” he asked in a voice so heavy with intention I had to swallow before my throat would cooperate and produce sound.

“Yes. Please do.” I smiled and willed my erratically beating heart to calm the fuck down. My eyes darted from feature to feature on his beautiful face and tried to catalog the details for later.

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