“That’s great that she helped your mom, but you were practically planning their wedding when James clearly wanted nothing to do withher.”
She flinches. “It was selfish... I just... Look, I don’t want to take over the law firm. You know that. But if James doesn’t, it falls on me. So when Allison told me she thought he might be wavering about joining the firm, I kind of freaked out, and she just had this plan. She was going to keep him on track, and they’d take it over together—you know, eventually replace my parents? And I’d be off the hook. I got carried away with it, and I stopped thinking about what was best for James. So I guess I owe both of you anapology.”
My shoulders settle, and I sink back into my chair. “Well, I’m still pissed, but you did drive all this way to apologize, and you inflicted bodily injury on yourself to do it, so I guess I’ll get over iteventually.”
“I didn’t drive all this way to apologize,” she says. “I drove all this way because you’re an idiot who’s incapable of answering her phone, and my brother is going batshit crazy trying to findyou.”
I slap my forehead. I turned it off when I went to bed and never turned it back on. “I was going to text him. I just hadn’t figured out what to say, and I guess I thought he’d just be sort of relieved I wasgone.”
“Relieved?I’ve never seen him this upset in my life. When you didn’t answer, he fucking drove to New York. He thought you’d gone back to theapartment.”
I groan. “I’m sorry. I had no idea he’d...care thatmuch.”
“Well, he does, and he’s driving back from New York right now, so get your ass in the car and comehome.”
“Look, it’s nice that you guys went to all this effort, but I’m not coming back. James just feels guilty, and he doesn’t need to be. He was always upfront with me about how this wouldend.”
Her laugh is half-humor and half surprise. “Elle, it’s not guilt. He’s miserable because he misses you, and you won’t answer hiscalls.”
I don’t want to hear that. I don’t want to hear anything that might make me feel bad for James when I’m sitting here brokenhearted and nowhere nearrecovering.
“What difference does it make now?” I ask. “I start school in a little over a week, and he’s moving toFrance.”
“No, he’s not. He told my parents he’d stay in law school if they’d help you. So they did. Killing a story about a 19 year old being preyed upon by a middle-aged man was child’s play for them, especially with the voicemails to prove it. They had the whole thing squashed by lastnight.”
“But why?” I gasp. “After everything he went through to get there? How could he give thatup?”
“He did it,” she says with a small smile, “because he’s apparently in love with you. But I probably ought to let him tell you thathimself.”
Chapter 55
ELLE
It’sdark by the time we get back to the beach. James, expecting my arrival, is waiting out on the front step. He looks broken, and I want to weep—half because I feel bad that I worried him and half because only now can I admit how much I missed him, how sick I’ve been, thinking I’d never see himagain.
He is across the yard before I’m out of the car, and he crushes me to his chest the second I’m out. “Never, ever, ever do thatagain.”
“I don’t want you to go back to law school,” I say, my words muffled by his T-shirt. “You can’t give up everything because ofme.”
“The FBI is going to let me start in a year. I’m more use to them with those degreesanyway.”
“But...you spent the whole summer sweating over this. You can’t just give upnow.”
“I already did. Just swear to me that you will never take off like thatagain.”
“I’m sorry. I thought...you’d berelieved.”
“Jesus,” he says, pulling back to study my face. “I’m sorry I let you think that, even for a second. I’m sorry I insisted on hiding this, and that I didn’t say the things I should have said a long time ago. I’m in love with you. Since the moment you walked out on the deck, nothing has been thesame.”
I refuse to cry, because I put on mascara while Ginny drove us back, and I don’t want to look like Alice Cooper. My eyes well in spite of my best efforts. “I love you too. But I think you’ve known that since I was aboutfour.”
He smiles. “I was 10. It meant slightly less to me than it doesnow.”
I start to agree, but then I stop. “But James, what about your mom? Isn’t she going to freak out about my age, and the fact that she hates myparents?”
“She’ll get over it,” he says, pressing his mouth gently to mine. “She has to. You’repermanent.”
Chapter 56