JAMES
Ginny and Allisonboth stare at my face, which undoubtedly has the truth written all overit.
I must have been out of my mind to seat Elle next to me. I knew I’d fuck up if I spent too much time around her, but I did it anyway—sat there listening to her laugh and leaning in close to smell her damn shampoo. And if you ever want proof that you’re too far gone over a girl, it’s the point where you catch yourself sniffing herhead.
I should have realized right then that I was taking things too far, that the longer I was there, the more I’d want from her, the more I’d want to submerge myself in the moment and forget everything else, all the other things I want from life—things that don’t include sleeping with my sister’s teenagefriend.
“What the fuck just happened?” Allisonasks.
I tell Allison and Ginny it was nothing. Neither of them appears to believe me. Nor should they. It was the opposite of nothing. It was the shittiest thing I’ve ever done, and I did it to someone I’ve always tried to look outfor.
* * *
We get to the next bar. Max asks where Elle is, and Ginny’s face cloudsover.
“She decided to go home,” she replies, making my stomach sink even further, since I’m undoubtedlyresponsible.
“Can I talk to you?” Allison demands. Reluctantly, I follow her outside the bar, and she rounds on me the moment we reach the sidewalk. “The truth, James. I want the fucking truth. What’s going on with you andElle?”
“I feel like we’ve had this conversation,” I reply. “Maybe because we have. Several times. It’s nice that you want to stay tonight because of Ginny’s birthday, but this is the last time I’m going to defend myself to you, because we are no longer together, and I don’t have to. Nothing is going on with Elle. Nothing is going to happen in the futureeither.”
“You’re a liar,” she seethes, drawing stares from passers-by. “You think I don’t see the way you look ather?”
“My feelings are irrelevant,” I snap. “I’m not going to act onthem!”
Her skin pales, and it’s only then that I realize I’ve admitted more than Ishould.
Ginny walks out to find Allison staring at me, caught between fury and tears. “What’s goingon?”
“I’m leaving, Ginny,” says Allison. “Thanks to your friend. Oh, and remember how I told you about Elle’s mom? How she seduces people, breaks up marriages? Well, James thinks she did it to your parents too. That’s why they separated. That’s why your mom’s been sick all this time. Because of Elle’s whore of amother.”
I’m speechless. So is Ginny. She looks like she’s beenhit.
But Allison just shrugs. “She needed to know before Elle does the same thing to her.” And then she turns and walks toward the parking lot, leaving a disaster in herwake.
Ginny looks small and scared, her eyes welling. “James?” Her voice cracks, and it hurts my chest. “Is thattrue?”
“She shouldn’t have told you that,” I say. “It was just a theory. I have noidea.”
“Oh my God,” she says, clutching her stomach. “Of course that’s what happened. Mom started hating the Graysons right when Dad left, and then the Graysons moved. And then she got all psycho about her weight. You thought that all this time and never toldme?”
“It’s just a theory, nothingmore.”
“Why haven’t youaskedthem,though?”
“I don’t want toknow. What possible good would that information do? Mom’s a disaster, and Dad’s been the only person holding this family together for years. I don’t want to start hating him too. And anyway, it’s all in thepast.”
“It’s not in the past!” She gasps. “Mom was never the same after that summer they separated. All because of Elle and hermom.”
“What does Elle have to do with any of it?” I say, my voice hard. “Are you responsible for our parents’choices?”
She saysnothing.
“And even if it’s true,” I continue, “Elle’smomwould only own half the blame. The other half is on ourfather.”
Ginny finds her voice again. “Dad would never have done something like this on his own. It’sthem. Do you know how many times in my life I’ve liked someone who couldn’t evenseeme because he was so blinded by Elle? Allison warned me about this months ago. I should havelistened.”
“Warned you about what?” I ask, trying to restrain my anger. “That Elle’s pretty? I’d think you’d have figured that out on yourown.”