Page 14 of No One But Us

What I really mean is that I am over all men but one. Albeit, a man who has a girlfriend and often doesn’t seem to notice I’m in theroom.

“You can’t let that thing with Ryan kill your mojo,” she says, heading toward thestairs.

“It has nothing to do with Ryan. There’s just enough drama with my family to keep me busy for onesummer.”

“That’s exactly why you need a man,” she counters. “To take your mind offthings.”

I look down from the landing to the crowd below, wondering if finding someone to take my mind off James isn’t such a bad idea, but I find everyone I can see curiously lacking. I suspect what they’re lacking is that they’re notJames.

“Ugh, gross,” Ginny whispers. “Let’s go around the back way. Martin is here.” Martin is our strange next-door neighbor, significantly older than the rest of us. He doesn’t seem to work and spends most of his day just hanging out on his front stoop, engaging whoever walks by in awkward, unendingconversation.

We wind our way to the back deck and sit with James and Max. I don’t say much, content merely to be near James, and I stare a little when I can get away with it. People come and go all night, but it’s really just the four of us for the most part. I briefly wonder why Max insists on these parties at all—he only seems to want to sit here needling Ginny no matter who elsecomes.

“I still can’t believe,” says Max, observing me, “that idiot boyfriend of yours told you he couldn’t go without getting laid allsummer.”

Ginny snorts. “Right, like you could? You wouldn’t even make it aweek.”

“I could for the right girl, Gin Gin,” he purrs. “Why don’t you dump that tool you’re dating and findout?”

She rolls her eyes. “Please.”

“Oh, what’s that?” asks Max, holding a hand to his ear. “Did you fail to write me into your 10-year plan? I think you might have forgotten the following bullet point: ‘sexual awakening that occurs once I suspect my high school boyfriend sucks inbed’.”

“I already have something that makes me happy. You’re just shitting on it because youdon’t.”

He arches a brow. “Or maybe you just think he makes you happy because you’re too scared of who you are when all of your boxes aren’tchecked.”

“How very philosophical, Max,” she says, her voice dripping withcondescension.

“I like to keep a few of those lines in my back pocket. They’re good for seducing girls from liberal arts schools,” he replies with agrin.

“If the girls you’ve brought home so far have ever set foot on a college campus, I’d beshocked.”

James just laughs. His eyes are softer, almost liquid, in the moonlight. He’s sprawled out in the chair he’s too big for, an easy smile on his face. It’s impossible not to be drawn to him in moments likethis.

Ginny and Max are consumed by their bickering, which I sense they both secretlyenjoy.

“They’re going to do this all summer, aren’t they?” I askJames.

“Yep.” He sighs. “Maybe I should have stayed at that internship afterall.”

“You don’t meanthat.”

“No,” he says. “Nothing could be worth working thereagain.”

“Why did you hate it so much?” Iask.

He takes a quick glance at Ginny, but she’s too busy arguing with Max to notice. “I just didn’t care about the work,” he says. “I don’t want to give up my whole life to help some rich asshole avoid criminal charges. They’ve made most of their money defending jackasses like Edward Ferris, you know? Shit never even goes to trial. My father goes running at anyone about to print a story or say something damaging to his client, usually somethingtrue, and threatens them until they shut it down. It’sdisgusting.”

“You don’t have to do what your parents do. There are millions of ways you can use a lawdegree.”

“The ways I’d want to use it aren’t ways that make money,though.”

“You’ll be fine,” I tease. “You can just room with Max for the rest of yourlife.”

He grins at me. “Don’t think I won’t kick your chair over just because you’re agirl.”

I laugh, and in the moment, being with him feels right, and easy, and slightly miraculous, as if I’ve finally lined up all the notches and ended up in the perfect place. I open my eyes, though, to find he’s no longer smiling. He’s looking at me in a way he never has before, eyes heavy-lidded, mouth slightlyajar.

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