Page 71 of Drowning Erin

A few minutes later, I am ushered into his office. It’s clear by the look on his face that he has no idea who I am. I introduce myself, mentioning that we met a few times at events in honor of Olivia, who’s probably the only ECU graduate to go on to even marginal fame. That softens him up a little. Olivia, in the years since she left, has put our athletics department on the map. He asks what he can help mewith.

“I have the marketing campaign you asked for,” I tell him, trying my best not to sound as pissed as I feel. “These pieces are a little rough, since we didn’t learn until yesterday that you needed them, but I thought I’d bring themby.”

It only occurs to me as I slide the pieces forward that I’ve just bypassed our workplace hierarchy. I’m going to be written up for this, at the very least. Probablyworse.

The chancellor looks confused. “Marketing campaign?” he says. “I didn’t ask forthis.”

I stare at him in confusion for a moment, and then my body goes cold. I think of all the last-minute requests Timothy’s made, and realize most of them coincided with times he wanted to punish me for something. I wonder ifanyof those requests came from thechancellor.

I can’t believe I’m just figuring this out now. And I can’t believe I just risked my job for no reason atall.

“I’m sorry,” I tell him. “Timothy gave us this project late yesterday and said they were needed today. I thought it must have been something important, given the turnaroundtime.”

“I didn’t ask for any of these,” he says. He looks at the pieces again. “How on Earth did you get all of this done sofast?”

My rage is gone, and the exhaustion hits me so suddenly I think I could curl up in this chair andsleep.

“We stayed up all night—me and one artist,” I say, rising with dejection pressing down on my shoulders. “I’m sorry I interruptedyou.”

I did all this work for nothing and may very well have gotten myself fired the first time I tried to do something aboutit.

“Does this happen a lot?” he asks. “Last-minute projects likethat?”

“It happens everyweek.”

He nods slowly. “And do you see much of Olivia thesedays?”

“I went up to watch her run Western States a few weeks ago, and I’m godmother to her kids, so I’ll be back for her daughter’s christening in a fewmonths.”

He tells me to say hello for him. I get the feeling my connection to Olivia matters far more than the marketing pieces I just left on his desk. I can only pray it matters enough that he doesn’t rat me out to myboss.

* * *

ItellBrendan the story later thatnight.

He groans. “Please explain to me why the fuck you’re stillthere.”

“Normal people require this thing called money, Brendan. I have bills.” I don’t expect him to understand, though. Brendan comes home each night raving about the tour he gave that day, spilling over with plans for bigger and more extensive adventures. His income is almost an afterthought because he has a job he’d do forfree.

“But you act like that place is the only job in the entire world,” he argues. “There are lots of jobs, and there are lots of jobs you might enjoy, or have a chance of getting promoted at, or not have to deal with a tool like yourboss.”

“But I like ECU. In terms of marketing jobs, it’s a good cause. What if my next job is marketing cigarettes to children? Orcocaine?”

He cocks a brow. “I haven’t seen a whole lot of cocaine advertising directed atkids.”

“And I might not make what Rob makes, but I’m sure I could make less. If my dad gets fired again, my parents will need help. And Sean always needs something. That’s not changing anytimesoon.”

He slaps his palm to his face. “Are you fucking serious right now? You’re talking about two grown-ass men who can handle their ownshit.”

“I’ve just made a lot of huge changes at once,” I tell him. “People do that when their lives suck, but mine didn’t suck. It just needed improvement. And I’m worried that if I keep changing everything, I’m going to look back and regret what I’vedone.”

“Are you talking about work?” he asks, not looking at me. “Or are you talking aboutRob?”

“I don’t even know anymore. I don’t know what I’mdoing.”

Three months ago I had job security and a fiancé and a very nice home. I had 20k in savings. Now I have none of those things. Sometimes people burn a bridge because they must. But you’re not supposed to burn them all atonce.

* * *

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