Page 45 of The Fate of Us

At least I have the songwriting camp coming up next month. But what if I find out I love the city and I want to stay there? Or what if they want me to stay?

I put the money away and head to my room, stripping out of my clothes and jumping in the shower.

If Noah wakes up, he will probably wonder where I am. But I can’t see him right now. I can’t let him see me torn up like this. I’m sure he has the same thoughts too. I see it in his eyes sometimes. I can tell he means it when he says he loves me but the hesitation that is buried deep in him still shows through. Is he worried I will leave him too?

* * *

I wakeup in the most uncomfortable position on the floor of my music room. Sheet music is spread around me and my guitar is somehow half under my back. I groan as I get up feeling like I pulled a muscle.

The smell of coffee infiltrates my nose. I know I didn’t set the auto start on the machine last night. After I got out of the shower I was still so torn about sleeping here or going to Noah’s that I decided to work on music. Obviously that didn’t work too well for me.

I push all the sheet music into a pile and put my guitar back in its case before making my way to the kitchen. Noah is sitting at the table sipping a cup of coffee.

We are supposed to finish moving the rest of my stuff over to his house today. One of the reasons my head was a mess last night.

And after that there is a family dinner at his parents’ house. Another reason I really need to get my head clear.

He rises from the table when he sees me walk in. His arms are around me and I instantly feel better. That should be answer enough for me.

“Hey.” He kisses my forehead. “I was worried when I woke up and you weren’t next to me. But I came over here and found you passed out in your music room. Figured you must have had some inspiration last night and fell asleep. I didn’t want to wake you.”

I walk over to the coffee pot and pour myself a cup. “You should have. I woke up in the worst position.” I grab my back and try to stretch it out.

Noah’s hands are on me instantly. “Want me to give you a massage?”

I scoff at him. “No, I should try yoga. If you give me a massage you will probably have my clothes off within five minutes and then none of my shit will get moved.”

He laughs. “You’re probably right. You still want to move everything today? If your back hurts I don’t want you to injure yourself more.”

I wave him off. “I’ll be fine. Besides the realtor told me there would be showings this week and I would prefer to be gone before all that happens.”

“Okay, babe. Well why don’t you start your yoga and I’ll pack up the kitchen.”

“Okay.”

An hour later I feel refreshed and relaxed. The yoga helped clear my mind and the stress from my body. Even now as I watch Noah pack my things with care I know I am making the right decision. I love him. I love him more than I’ve ever loved anyone. There will come a time when I have to figure out what’s more important, my dreams or my heart, but right now I am sticking with my heart. Besides, maybe I will be able to have both one day.

“I can’t wait for your house to finally look like a home,” I tease him.

“Our house, Mayberry.”

I smile at him, a warmth flooding my body at his words. “Our house.”

“It could definitely use more plants. The one you brought over already made me feel like my house was a home.”

“And just think you can get rid of that nasty old leather sofa in your living room and we can use mine.”

He stops what he is doing and stares at me. “My what? That sofa is not going anywhere.”

I roll my eyes at him. “It’s going to the curb. That thing is hideous. And uncomfortable. Don’t even try to fight me on that.”

“It’s not hideous.”

I shake my head as I reach for Noah. “The thing looks like it’s twenty years old.”

“It’s well loved.”

“It’s gone.”