Page 104 of Forgotten Pieces

Because I can’t deny it any longer.

I shouldn’t love her.

But I do.

She doesn’t deserve me. And there is no way in hell we can make this work. I would shatter her dreams at some point.

I wish this could work. Maybe another time and place. But I know this needs to end.

I inhale her sweet scent and let myself enjoy this last moment with her.

Chapter Thirty-Three

Tacoma

I’m sitting on Laney’s back porch, margarita in hand, as I let her vent about the school day. I only have a little bit of time with her because I got called into work at six. She spends ten minutes talking at a million miles an hour before she leans back and takes a deep breath.

“Okay,” she says. “I feel better.”

“Good, because I don’t know half of what you said.”

She grins at me and takes a generous sip of her drink. “Soooo Tacoma why don’t you spill about Ryder.”

I spit my drink out. I haven’t told her because I am a terrible friend. And the only people who know are my sister, who doesn’t talk to Laney, and Mac. That motherfucker is going to die. “What about Ryder?” I say nonchalantly.

“How did you ever get a job on Broadway? You are seriously the worst liar in the world.”

“Acting and lying are two different things,” I say hoping to change the subject.

“Um not really. And don’t try to change the subject on me,” she says as she shakes a finger at me.

I put my hands up in surrender. “Okay fine. I’m in love with him, he’s in love with me. He has been for eight years. He broke up with Shelley so we could be together.”

Laney’s mouth hangs open and I am tempted to push her jaw shut. “I think you need to fill me in on what I’ve been missin’. And keep your voice down. I think I just heard Judy lean against the fence next door.”

I laugh at that. Poor Laney is stuck between two gossip queens. So whenever she does anything remotely wild, the whole town knows. It’s why we rarely stay at her house when we drink. We are slightly wild.

I start from the night of her birthday. I tell her how excited I am for Ryder to come over again tonight. I gave him keys to my place last week so he could let himself upstairs on my late night shifts. I was always so tired when I would get to his house at one in the morning. He thought it best if he just came to me. And I am not complaining. He always has hot food ready for me and he is usually shirtless. It’s a win-win.

“Wow, T. I can’t believe this all happened and you didn’t tell me.”

“It was our secret, Laney. I needed to keep it secret. I want to keep it a secret until Shelley finally comes home so she can move her things out and he can feel like he can move on.”

Laney pours another drink from the pitcher I made her and offers me one, but I decline. “Be careful, T. I don’t want you getting hurt like the last time.”

“I know. And it’s so hard to guard my heart around him. We are soulmates, we have to work.”

“It will work. But I think it’s gonna be a lot harder than you think. It sounds like Shelley wasn’t into this whole break up thing from what you told me. She might make it more difficult.”

I check the time and notice I need to leave. “She will make it difficult. She has trouble seeing things from Ry’s perspective. But we are both prepared for that. We know it will be hard.”

I stand up to leave and Laney stands too, giving me a hug. “Be careful, Tacoma. I don’t want to see you hurt again. But I am happy for you. You deserve happiness and I have never seen anyone make you as happy as that man does.”

* * *

I’m antsy as I wait for my shift to be over. It was busy for a Thursday and all I want to do is go upstairs, eat a delicious meal, and make love to Ryder.

I finally close the bar down. I hop and skip to the back door and lock it behind me. I skip steps as I hustle up the stairs. All I want is a taste of Ryder. I hope he is standing buck naked for me when I come in.

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