Page 4 of My Pucking Mate

She perches herself on my right thigh, looking down at me with big, green eyes that get her pretty much anything from everyone else she crosses paths with. Even I would find her green eyes gorgeous, but there is something that lies beneath them that I just can't put my finger on. It’s unsettling.

I don’t react or speak, just a simple curt nod. She visibly melts, thinking she’s gotten her way this time, so I’ll let her have her moment. She shuffles out of the room, and I can hear her nearly sprinting to my room at the end of the hall.

I allow myself another few moments of peace to finish my whiskey before following after her. Almost to my bedroom, I hear Benny.I recommend everyone clear out. Alpha’s headed to take some steam out on India again. Alpha, please remember to block this time; nobody wants in on that. Well, the twins might never . . .I throw my walls up before he can finish his thought. They know how our arrangement works. They also know that I hope I never actually have to marry her. I’ve been trying to find a way out of it for years.

India has spent her life living as an American socialite for so long that I think she forgets she's a werewolf. She does the social media thing on her phone, obsessed with every click, like, and follow. I think she calls herself an influencer or something. The thought of her influencing anyone, about anything, is unfathomable. Part of our arrangement is that our impending betrothal does not carry into our public lives. To the world, we’re both single. In private, and in Zabella, we’ll be married someday.

She’s already naked on my bed with my blankets wrapped around her when I enter the room.

“Turn around, hands and knees on the bed,” I order as I begin removing my clothing. She knows better than to argue with me when I’m like this. She tried once, resulting in my clothes beingreturned to my body and her leaving town for a couple weeks. I need the control, and I need the release.

I take my time, making her wait, knowing how much she hates the quiet anticipation, but also knowing it makes her even wetter. Without ceremony, I climb onto the bed behind her, my wolf growling under my skin—he hates her with a strength I don’t understand. In a swift single motion, I grip her hips and fully seat myself inside her. She cries out from the intrusion, and my wolf’s low growl becomes a snarl.

Her moaning whimpers only fuel me more as I pound into her without restraint, urging me to take her harder. My release finds me quickly, but I don’t let it enter her body. Instead, I unload it all in her hair, knowing how much she hates it. She complains about how hard it is to wash out. I smirk at myself for the first time today. I'm not a total fucking monster, though. Reaching both arms around her lean frame, my left hand pinches her nipple, while my right hand travels lower. Once I’ve reached her mound, I begin to pump two fingers into her while my palm rubs her bundle of nerves until she swiftly finds her release as well.

I roll around her to drop onto my pillow, lost in thought. I hate to admit that I do feel a little better after hashing it out with India. I guess if I’m forced to marry someone, it helps when that someone can handle me and the demons from my past. I feel myself drifting off to sleep as she crawls out of bed, heading for the bathroom to shower and wash me out of her hair.

I know I’m dreaming as soon as it begins.

It’s the same every time.

I’m almost home when I hear her screaming.

I immediately shift into my wolf and bolt for our small home on the furthest edge of the castle grounds. Even on four legs, it feels as though an eternity passes before I make it to our cottage.

Shifting back into my human body and throwing the door off the hinges as I burst through, I’m met with silence, which is far more terrifying. At least when she was screaming, I knew she was alive. She’s been having that itchy feeling lately, like someone’s watching her. I know it doesn’t make sense, but I learned a long time ago to trust her judgment; I couldn’t find any trace of anyone. No scents. No tracks. Nothing.

I finally find her just outside the back door after frantically searching every room. She’s lying face down in her new clusters of azaleas. She planted them when she realized she was pregnant with our pup. I slowly kneel to turn her over, but I already know.

I can’t feel her wolf, and mine is already howling. Her heartbeat is so light and slow that I know she only has a moment left, so I do the only thing I can. I hold her as close to me as physically possible and whisper all the words I hope she can hear in her final moments in her body.

As our mate bond is snapped, the scream that rips from my lungs is unnatural. It's what I imagine a dragon would sound like if they still walked the earth. I know that there’s little chance the baby survived, as it wasn’t due for another month. Holding my breath, I lay my head on the tight swell of her belly and listen and pray to the Moon Goddess that at least one can be saved. Silence. I’ve never understood when someone said they found silence to be loud. I know now, and I wish I could take away this knowledge.

BENNY!I know he and my other men would have heard me scream, but I need to make sure. I may be the stronger of the two of us, but he’s the tracker. I need him.

BENNNYYY!I scream once more as his cinnamon-colored wolf hurtles into view, howling and crying immediately as he takes in the scene. He’s off and running before I even have to ask; he knows what I need. So I just hold them. My Imogen. My mate. My reason for living and breathing. My world. And my child.

I don’t know how long I sit in the same spot, just holding them as tightly to my body as they can go. Benny returns, slowly approaching us. He loved her as much as I did. He shifts, drops to his haunches, and wraps his arms around us. We sit there like that for only another moment. Benny sits up, looks at me, and says, “The guys are on the way. I’m so sorry, Roman. I couldn’t find anything; not a single trace of anyone being here at all.” I think I can stand and step away from her as my father comes into sight just before the rest of my men.

“ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?” I roar. My whole body is trembling with rage and the effects of losing my mate. The one soul in the universe made just for me. My other half.

My father always hated her and felt she was beneath me. How can anything so perfect be measured by levels of status? Who the fuck cares that she grew up in the village like a normal werewolf and not some royal pompous ass?!

He holds his hands out in front of him as if to surrender. “I mean no harm. I heard and came to check on you. Oh, son, I’m so sorry.”

I can't hear him over the roaring of my blood and the howling of my wolf as I crumble back down to the ground.I can’t do this.Another guttural cry leaves my human body.

I can't do this.I release control to my wolf, who is still howling. The howls morph into snarling at my father as he backs away and finally leaves my sight. As my men approach, I wrap my wolf's body around her. Blood coating my thick, cream-colored fur. Her blood.

I hadn't even noticed the blood before.

My wolf can't handle it either, and I’m thrown back into my human form, screaming and praying that this is also my end and I can be with them on the other side.

I’m still screaming as I jolt awake in the dark. My entire body is covered in a sheen of cold sweat. India lets out a small screech as she holds onto me in the night. “Oh, Roman baby, are you ok? You’re shaking.”

“Don’t touch me!” I shout as I throw her arm away from my body and launch myself out of the bed. “You know not to touch me when it comes to her.”

She bows her head, dresses quickly, and leaves.

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