Page 161 of 1001 Dark Nights: Bundle Forty-Seven

“I’ll grab drinks!” Buck offers.

“I can help.” I follow him into the pool house. “Something is going on today. My mom is acting strange. Stranger than usual, even.”

“My dad has been the same for the past couple of days. He’s been all smiles since Skye came over Sunday night. Usually, when I’ve done something stupid and irresponsible, he’s grumpy for a couple of days, but it hasn’t been the case this time around.”

“Huh. Well, I feel like they’re gearing up for the big reveal of whatever it is.” Buck passes me a bottle of white wine and a grape soda, then grabs a beer and an orange soda for himself. He doesn’t spike it with vodka this time.

Sidney and Mom are sitting at the outdoor dining table, the appetizer platter set in the middle. Mom’s hands are folded together, and she’s still wearing that creepy, weird smile that looks like it belongs on one of those awful dolls with the eyes that blink. I give her a questioning look, but all she does is continue to grin.

Buck passes his dad the beer and pops the cork on the wine bottle, then pours half of it into a stemless wine glass for my mom. She murmurs a thank you and takes a seriously hefty gulp.

“All right. What’s going on?” I cross my arms. “Mom, you’ve got your creepy smile thing going on. Someone needs to spill the beans, whatever the beans are.”

Mom and Sidney look at each other. “We have some news we’d like to share.”

“Oh shit! Skye’s preggers, isn’t she!” Buck holds his hand up to his dad for a high five. “Your swimmers still work!”

Sidney stares at Buck’s outstretched hand.

I knock it out of the air. “My mom isn’t preggers. She’s drinking a bowl of wine. You can’t drink when you’re pregnant and she has an IUD.”

“What does drinking and driving have to do with getting pregnant? Unless those things all happened at the same time,” Buck’s eyes go wide.

“Not a DUI, an IUD, intrauterine device. It’s a form of birth control,” I explain.

“Oh. Well, that makes a lot more sense. So no one is pregnant?” Buck looks from me to my mom and back to me, eyes widening again.

“I’ve never even made it past second base with anyone but myself, so no, no one is pregnant.”

Sidney coughs.

Mom thrusts her hand out like this is some kind of sports circle where they all put their hand in the middle and do the whole “we’re going to kick some ass” thing. Buck clearly thinks this is what’s happening because his hand shoots out too.

But before his giant of a mitt covers hers, I spot the massive rock decorating her finger. I slap Buck’s hand away and grab my mom’s wrist. In the process I knock over my chair and my grape soda, which, by some miracle, Buck catches before it makes a mess.

“Oh my God! That’s an engagement ring! You got engaged? You’re getting married? Fuck! I should have put money on this! I knew something big was going down!” I shout.

I release my mom’s hand and trip over the leg of the chair as I try to round the table. I go sprawling across the patio, scraping both of my palms and my right knee and my glasses go flying.

Buck, being the ridiculously agile and not-clumsy soon-to-be-stepbrother that he is, picks me up and sets me on my feet, then hands me my glasses.

“Thanks. I wish my feet were better at their job.”

Sidney, being the smart, thoughtful guy he is, quickly stands and pulls my mom’s chair out for her so she doesn’t suffer the same fate. We both step to the edge of the table, throw our hands in the air, and scream obnoxiously loud.

“You’re getting hitched!” I shout.

“I am!” she shouts back.

We rush each other, our boobs slamming together, causing us to grunt in discomfort, but we wrap our arms around each other and hug and jump up and down until we step on each other’s feet. Then we just sway back and forth.

“You’re okay with this?” Mom whispers.

“More than okay.” I squeeze her tight.

It’s been the two of us for a damn long time. We’re ready to add some testosterone to the estrogen fest.

Buck and Sid are standing side by side, wearing matching smiles. Buck looks like maybe he’s on the edge of getting emotional. Dude is a huge freaking fuzzy yeti-bear.

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